Mia Galuppo
November 14, 2013 5:00 pm

Amazon.com has announced that it will team up with the US Postal Service and will start to deliver packages on Sundays.

Am I the only one that thinks this is kinda unnecessary? Don’t get me wrong, I am as impatient to receive my Electric Fondue Maker as the next girl but, honestly, I could wait an extra day or to before I cover all of my fridge is melted gouda.

I firmly believe that that all technological, industrial, social, metaphysical and anecdotal advancements have their appropriate users, no matter how ridiculous they may seem. Even so, a few of them still seem pretty ridiculous.

I don’t want to come off as the person standing in the corner of a Radio Shack with their circa-2005 iPod Mini muttering to themselves, “Kids these days.” I am hip on the times. I mean, Justin Bieber’s hair is still a thing, right? Sometimes I just look at supposed “improvements” and find myself unsure of their effectiveness and, furthermore, their necessity. Below are six examples of advancements that make me skeptical of the modern definition of convenience.

1. Siri

Apple’s personal assistant is completely unnecessary.

We don’t have the time to talk on the phone, so we text. Now, we don’t have the time to type out a text so we talk to our phone.

And maybe I just don’t know to use it properly, but I don’t think Siri is all that helpful in the first place.

And she is kinda bossy

2. Transitions Lenses

Just go for the prescription sunglasses.

As a person who once had Transitions, there is nothing more frustrating than sitting in a TGIFridays and looking like you think you are too cool for school because you are wearing sunglasses inside, when in reality you are just waiting for your sunglasses to transform into your reading glasses.

3. Moving Walkways

You usually end up going the same pace as the people walking beside you. Although, when you actively walk on a moving walkway you feel like a kind of superhero or, at least, like Flash’s disappointing younger brother.

You are invincible. You are unconquerable. You are infinite.

That is, until you reach the end of the conveyor and your hubris goes crashing to the ground, along with your body. You underestimated exactly how fast you were traveling and your legs forget how to function on a stationary floor.

4. Lists

Cause everything is easier to read with a number in front of it, am I right?

5. Grocery Delivery Services

For the busy parent, I can see the necessity in such a service, but for many others I am not sure that I understand the need.

Although, I do understand the temptation. Sometimes you just want to buy your three-gallon container of cottage cheese and not be judged by the other customers in the checkout line.

6. Doritos Locos Tacos

Gone are the days where you would have to order a Taco Bell taco and then go to the drug store and buy a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos and then take a bite of each in order to achieve the desired flavor combination. Now they just combine them for you?

Where is the ingenuity? The imagination?

Kids these days.

Featured image via.

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