Sophia Elias
December 07, 2014 9:45 am

Let’s begin by stating the obvious here: Holiday shopping can be stressful. TOO stressful for what it is. What was once a fun and thoughtful experience has now turned into the adult version of a book report. Maybe it’s because we’re doing most of the spending now, or perhaps as we’ve grown older we’ve learned the mall is a scary, scary place in December (and our laptops back at home with new episodes of Scandal are much safer).

Worst of all, holiday shopping has the power to take away your better judgement. You may find yourself buying a GoPro, laser hair removal, a Vitamix, and a brand new purse on a single credit card. . .in one day. Aside from being stripped of all rationality and financial planning skills, shopping can also instill you with self-doubt, paranoia and dread. You are better than that. You are bigger than that. You just have to take a deep breath, step out of the mall, and think outside of the box.

Fortunately, we thought outside of the box for you (you’re welcome). Even if these items aren’t quite what you’re looking for, they’ll get your gears turning.

For the history buff
Edwardian Panties, Five Go Mad, ~$32

As Bullett Magazine so eloquently put it on their Instagram, these are “very important period panties”. Ha. Get it? I know that might be little TMI for some, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that this pair of underwear is funny as hell. If Elizabeth I doesn’t float your boat, the panties are available in Henry VIII, Shakespeare and Ann Boelyn.

For the eccentric music lover
Mason Jar Speaker & Amplifier, Uncommon Goods ($65.00)

This quirky little mason jar is basically a portable party hub. Hook it up to your smartphone or any electronic instrument, and have yourself an impromptu jam session. When the party’s over, tote it around and tell people it’s your pet.

 For the fair weathered friend
Handmade Shark Slippers, Uncommon Goods ($42.00)

How can anyone resist these? These are the cutest, most non-threatening shark slippers I’ve ever seen. Bonus: There are no-slip grip pads on the bottom shaped like fish. Double bonus: They come in baby, toddler and adult sizes.

For the aspiring cat DJs (and their parents)
DJ Cat Scratching Pad, Uncommon Goods ($35.00)

As a dog mom, I understand that we want the best for our pets. That said, if your cat “wants to be a DJ” (that’s a euphemism for “scratches everything to hell”), this scratching pad might be the best decision you’ve ever made. Your cat will be making guest appearances at Hakkasan as DJ Tunamelt in no time *air horns*.

For the handy dandy candle lover
DIY Soy Candle Kit, Uncommon Goods ($30.00)

You know what they say: If you want something done right, you just have to do it yourself. Unless it’s a complicated plumbing problem. Undertaking this sort of DIY project can be a fun and gratifying experience. Not to mention, candles are a nice way to make your winter days more romantic.

For the suave entertainer
Cheese & Crackers Serving Board, Uncommon Goods ($48.00)

If you’ve ever made a cheese plate, you know how complicated it is to artfully stack the crackers. This is a very cute (and functional) solution to all of your dinner party woes. It’s also a great incentive to buy more crackers and cheese.

For the environmentally conscious doodler
Reclaimed Sketch Book, Colossal Shop ($16.99)

Who doesn’t love getting a little messy with their doodles? Reclaimed paper gives you permission to get as wild as you want —nothing is precious! Did I mention you’re also saving trees? Double whammy.

For the Sriracha lover
Sriracha Flavored Candy Canes, Perpetual Kid ($7.99)

If you want your candy canes to pack a little punch this year, look no further than this 12-pack of Sriracha flavored candy canes. If you can keep from eating them all by yourself, this might be a great accessory to these Sriracha socks.

For the punny mathematician
The “I Eight Some Pi” Plates, Uncommon Goods ($35.00)

The person at the receiving end of this gift should, at a minimum, like math. If they need some dishware and love pie, well —you might be the best gift-giver ever.

For the modern gardener
Rainy Pot, The Colossal Shop ($24.00)

Don’t flood your plants with water, flood them with evenly dispersed love —and water. These adorable wall-hung planters do the work for you. Once you add water to the Rainy Pot’s cloud basin, it’ll release water for you in small, even increments. Now, if only we could do this with our weather.

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