Kenya Foy
October 16, 2017 2:48 pm
20th Television

Calling all people who are paying the price for boozing it up excessively over the weekend: We know you’re probably feeling too effed up to pay attention to us blathering on about all the sensible things your body wants when you’re hungover, but they might be the complete opposite of what you think it wants. Yes, we’re here in defiance of your typical drunk eating habits, even though we know firsthand that the best greasy food is basically all you crave when you’re hungover.

As any inebriated person will attest to, will power is no match for the potency of heavy alcohol-induced cravings that will have you ordering two of everything off the value menu and gleefully scarfing it all down while drunk texting your ex.

Unfortunately, you could come to regret both of those decisions in the morning, although that ex situation is a little bit out of our wheelhouse at the moment. This is more of the “Oh-sh*t-I drank-too-much-now-what” advice for your body.

In other words, these are the things your body *actually* wants from you when you’re hungover.

1Potassium

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Whenever you hit the bottle really hard, your body’s potassium levels diminish, right along with your ability to stand up straight and form coherent sentences. Although it’s not a cure for drinking too much, increasing your potassium intake can certainly help ease hangover symptoms.

Some potassium-rich foods that will help your hangover include bananas, tomatoes, coconut water, watermelon and Greek yogurt. While we’re at it, here’s an ultimate hangover sandwich recipe that we would gladly eat while sober (srsly, there’s an avocado and bacon involved).

2Water

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Obviously, you should strive to drink enough H₂O at all times, but this certainly applies if you’ve gone extra hard on the alcoholic beverages, which deplete the body of water, basically turning you into a desert in human form. According to Women’s Health, plain ol’ H₂O is just as effective as electrolyte drinks at restoring hydration after a hangover.

3Amino acids

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If you’re nursing a hangover, here’s an easy breakfast of champions your mauled mind and body will really appreciate: eggs. As Shape reports, eggs are great at helping hangovers because they contain amino acids taurine and cysteine.

4 Carbs

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According to Business Insider, researchers believe that carbohydrates helps ease some symptoms of a hangover, because they contain glucose that helps to restore blood sugar levels, which drop drastically with every boozy drink you sip. The positives? You’re feeling good and buzzed out of your mind. But the payoff is stiff: Low blood sugar levels make you moody, sluggish and more than likely unbearable to everyone (including yourself).

5Rest

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Because alcohol does a number on your sleep patterns, you’re more prone to not resting well during the night. Between tossing and turning and endless trips to the bathroom, the hangover nightmare tends to continue well into the next day when you can barely keep your head up or your eyes focused.

This is precisely why a lot of experts say don’t go to the gym if you’re hungover. Any attempts to “sweat out” your hangover can only lead to further dehydration, cramps, muscle strains and pulls, Glamour reports. Instead, give your body extra rest and resume your workouts when you’re feeling more like your steady, sober self.

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