Mollie Hawkins
February 27, 2015 7:18 am

A few days ago, actor Billy Zane revealed what he wants to see happen when the new Twin Peaks returns in 2016. (Hint: It has something to do with the return of Billy Zane’s character). Well if Billy Zane can make a TP request for director David Lynch, so can we, ay? OK, maybe it’s a little different, but still. . .

There are a few things in particular that I hope to see from the beloved Pacific Northwest crew, which I will share with you now because you’re so sweet, but I will warn you: if you haven’t finished the show, full-on spoiler alert right here! Do not continue! Read this post about puppies instead.

And now, for the rest of you, here’s what I’m ready for.

Audrey Horne and her impeccable fashion sense.

Audrey Horne did more than charm us with her oxford shoes, her perfect high-waist skirts paired with cashmere sweaters and red fingernails; she was an ambitious philanthropist, always fighting for justice—not unlike our favorite Special Agent. And speaking of Mr. Cooper: I’d really like to see these two finally share an on-screen kiss. Especially now that Audrey is technically no longer jailbait.

The log lady still being exactly the log lady.

I have a soft spot for the Log Lady; she’s like the quirky aunt that I never had, the one that offered me tea and cookies (but no cake) before telling stories about what her log saw that day. In Brad Dukes’ bookReflections: An Oral History of Twin Peaks, Catherine Coulson (the Log Lady herself) admits that she is still in possession of the famous Log. Not only is that adorable, but also a great indicator of the kind of dedication the actors of Twin Peaks will bring back with them. All we ask is: stay weird, Log Lady. Be your fabulous self. We want to hear what your log has to say.

A modern-day Double R Diner. . .

The Double R Diner is a very real place in North Bend, WA (the actual “Twin Peaks”), only it’s called Twede’s Cafe and fret not: the coffee and pie are just as delicious as you’d expect them to be (or at least they were in 2014 when I last visited). But what will the Double R look like in 2016? Will it have a hip new coffee shop next door that boasts free WiFi? Lynch is known for his dreamy vintage sensibilities, so I’m cool if the town diner is still exactly the same, jukebox and all.

Bonus points if Norma and Shelly are still rocking those amazing throwback tiffany-blue waitress uniforms.

An update on a few people. Seriously, is Josie still a doorknob?

Leo Johnson was trapped by a giant spider (how long do those live? Nevermind, I don’t want to know); Annie was possibly stuck in an alternate universe, dead, or maybe just breaking up with Cooper in a really awkward way; Bobby was on the brink of growing out of his rebel-football-player phase; Nadine may or may not still think she’s an 18-year-old trapped in a middle-aged-body (I want to believe she finally made her fortune from those silent drape runners); Laura Palmer is. . .let’s not even open that can of worms yet.

But the question remains: Josie, our beloved-if-not-homicidal temptress, may or may not be trapped inside the furniture of the Great Northern. We need to know!

Lucy and Andy’s kid.

Don’t pretend you weren’t totally stoked when Lucy announced she was pregnant with—probably—Deputy Andy’s kid. Lucy talks too much, and Andy tends to be overly emotional, but both of these characters were perhaps two of the most genuine and loving of the entire town. Whether they ended up having a boy or a girl, I can’t wait to see the beautiful person they created. Please let them be a sensitive cop (like there’d be any other kind in this town).

Dale Cooper’s coffee-and-pie passion.

We know he’s coming back to lead the cast of characters, but will he be is old pie-eating self? Because our love springs eternal, and we can’t get enough of the Special Agent, or his insatiable lust for pie. We’re rooting for you, Coop.

[Images viavia, viavia]

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