Extra Crispy
October 04, 2017 2:00 pm
J. Countess/WireImage via Getty Images

When it comes to the intersection of celebs and food news, we’re usually being lectured by Gwyneth Paltrow on why you should be drinking more smoothies, or maybe marveling at Scott Foley’s bizarre-yet-not-bad peanut butter scrambled eggs. But now, the weirdest of the weird has come together for the ultimate internet meme snack: Nicolas Cage-themed junk food in Japan. No, this isn’t just the pipe dream of a Redditor.

Sora News 24

reports that Nic Cage is indeed becoming a snack food in Japan in the form of a “Nicolastick.”

In a throwback to the golden days of weird star-studded advertising, Nicolas Cage’s unique, unmistakable face will appear on the Umaibo Nicolastick in a promotional tie-in for the Japanese release of his upcoming film, Ore no Emono wa bin Laden, or Bin Laden Is My Prey.

Related article: This Japanese milk ad will haunt your dreams

You may know the film from its original title, Army of One, which premiered in late 2016 in the US; the film is hitting Japanese theaters this December, according to Sora News 24.

So wait, what in the hell is a Nicolastick? And will his face be on the actual food? Nah, you don’t have to be terrified that your food will scream insanely at you. His face will only be on the packaging for Japan’s beloved Umaibo puffed corn sticks, a favorite of junk-food lovers in Japan. The corn sticks come in various flavor options and often sell for less than 10 cents, according to Sora News 24.

Related article: Pancake pudding is coming to Japan

Unfortunately, though you may want to stock up on these babies for your Nic Cage-themed party, they’re not available in stores; in order to get them, you’d have to purchase advance tickets for the Japanese showing of the film when they go on sale on October 13. It’s currently unclear how many Nicolasticks you’d get for a $14 ticket, but you should probably get the popular corn chowder flavor.

In my opinion, they should have come up with a signature “losing your shit” flavor.