Jessica Ellis
March 01, 2016 1:05 pm
Twitter

The future is here! And as promised by many a sci-fi world, food is now cube-shaped! Well, not quite food, but coffee is now cube-shaped, gummy, and chewable, so honestly we’re improving on those dystopian forecasts already.

Go Cubes, manufactured by forward-thinking, slightly mad-scientist sounding developers Nootrobox, are in fact chewable caffeine gummies with other ingredients geared toward boosting brain power. These include sugar (not surprising) but also B vitamins and amino acids, which give you office work superpowers (although the FDA has not confirmed that correlation or evaluated the statements about Go Cubes’ abilities.)

BuzzFeed recently took these coffee-replacements out for a test-drive and reported their results. Sounds like the initial mouthfeel was tasty enough, “Coffee connotes a performance aspect that lemon just doesn’t,” explained Nootrobox co-founder Michael Brandt, if “synthetic,” as one BuzzFeed editor put it. The writer/guinea pig did experience some caffeinated boost from the cubes, as did another BuzzFeed tester who commented, “WHAT SORCERY IS IN THOSE WEIRD CUBES ON THE TABLE. I’M SO AWAKE AFTER BEING SO TIRED.”

A bit of a caffeine crash apparently followed, but writer Nitasha Tiku claimed the ups-and-downs “flattened somewhat,” after a few days of testing. “But I still felt like the cubes were effective.”

Go Cubes were launched as an IndieGoGo campaign in mid-2015, and are rolling out in the next few weeks on Amazon’s experimental products platform, Launchpad, just to complete the round of Millennial market saturation. Their website suggests they’re also good product for people really on the go, like backpackers and astronauts. We also think they could be a decent way to cut back on caffeine gradually, since each cube contains about half the caffeine of a cup of coffee (not to mention potentially reducing the temptation of the calorie bomb that are frappucinos.)

But are you guys ready to give yourself over to the cube-food revolution? Is Nootrobox jumping the shark on future-y product development? What are the odds that there will be cubed kale before the year is out?

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