It’s pretty well understood that the ’90s were basically the best decade ever. Current 20-somethings grew up with the best music, TV shows, slang, and fashion. Something else that we definitely had the upper hand on is definitely toys. The toys I had growing up were entertaining, educational, and super cute. I know I’m supposed to be spending my money on adult things, but really, how much does Polly Pocket go for these days? These toys taught me important lessons, which were as simple as, “leave your mom alone for a few hours,” and as complex as, “this is how you take care of another life.” The ’90s were intense, you guys.
TBH, I still could use some of the childhood toys I left behind all those years ago. So here’s my ’90s toy store wishlist for 2015.
The Easy Bake Oven taught me how to make pre-mixed cakes with excellent precision, which continues to be the extent of my baking skills. Additionally, my baked goods now are still basically as inedible as the brownies that came out of this fire hazard oven. I think it was supposed to teach me how to decorate cupcakes as well, but really it just taught me that I’m terrible at decorating cupcakes.
Tamagotchi/Nano Pets/Giga Pets
These things were little balls of responsibility and anxiety that I was not ready for in 2nd grade. They constantly needed to be played with, fed, and cleaned up after, and for some reason my parents let me have THREE. Now there were multiple creatures I had to keep alive: a cat, a dog, and a baby, while also learning my times tables. It was tough, and I’d be lying if I said they never died, but eventually I figured it all out.
Lite-Brites were my whole world. I obsessively filled in all of the pre-made designs and then just started making my own. I remember making a special design to commemorate the birth of my niece, because I was obviously a true artist. It functioned as an ongoing art project and a night light at the same time, so it was the perfect toy.
Skip It taught me how to enjoy exercise and also how to tend to wounds. I’m not sure how spinning a heavy plastic ball around your ankle seemed like a safe idea to anyone, but I constantly had scraped knees, hands, and face due to Skip It-related injuries. Despite all that, it definitely beats the treadmill as a form of exercise. Can someone please get me one for Christmas?
While my Barbie Jeep taught me the very important lesson of how to drive a car, it did not prepare me for making car payments on time or how obnoxious gas prices were. It was a much simpler time, when I could freely drive as far as I wanted (but not past the driveway), and the only thing I had to worry about was charging the battery when it died.
Pogs turned me into a maniacal businesswoman. I knew which ones were valuable and which ones were worthless, and I was frantic in my pursuit of the valuable ones. I had to bargain like a pro to get what I wanted, and I would not rest until all of the Power Rangers pogs were mine!
(All images via Amazon)