Bumble, a dating app that lets women make the first move, is here to tell the world that they won’t put up with sexism and straight-up jerk behavior. A particularly insulting exchange was brought to Bumble’s attention when David Cruz III, a Millionaire Matchmaker cast member, tweeted about the absurdity of a Bumble chat between a guy and girl.
The story goes like this. Ashley and Connor began talking innocently on Bumble. He asked how she was doing. She said she was doing pretty good, and that things were a bit slow at work. Next, she simply asked what he did for work.
“Is that always the first question following your opener from you?” Connor replied.
“No but I figured sense I mentioned it was slow at work I would be nice and ask you what you do,” Ashley replied.
That’s when the rampage started. Connor goes on to accuse Ashley of asking about his job in order to use him for his money. “I’ve gotten tired of girls like you who shamelessly attempt to pry into my career (and really the kind of money/earning potential I have),” he wrote.
Ashley stood up for herself and said that the “tantrum you just threw is no way to find out about me.”
He went on to say, “I don’t have time for entitled, gold-digging whores.” Whoa.
“I don’t fall victim not prescribe to this neo-liberal, Beyonce, feminist cancer which plagues society and says a guy can’t as so much as give constructive criticism to and call a girl out on her bullshit,” he continued. (So I doubt he enjoyed Lemonade.)
Connor wrapped up the convo with the following: “Go take your $40,000/account manager job & asu degree elsewhere. My $300,000 job and Notre Dame finance degree has no use for you.” Just, wow.
Bumble is founded by Whitney Wolfe — the co-founder of Tinder who sued the company for sexual harassment — has always been vocal about her no-tolerance-for-bullying policy. She wants Bumble to be a safe space for women to date people who respect them and treat them right. So of course when the Bumble team caught wind of this horrific exchange, they stepped in to make a loud and positive statement.
They wrote an open letter to Connor, which politely but firmly let him know that this kind of behavior was not to be tolerated. Bumble kicked off by letting Connor know that Ashley, like a lot of other women, work, a fact that is usually used as a jumping off point for small talk.
“[Ashley] wasn’t hoping to figure out if your wallet was sizeable enough for her to move into your house and start cooking dinner for you after vacuuming your living room while you clock in a 9 to 5 work day,” they wrote. “Instead, Ashley was (wait for it, Connor, because this is where things really get interesting), viewing herself as an equal. It might sound crazy, but people connect over the basic routines of life. You know… the weather, working out, grabbing a drink, eating, and working.”
“And while you may view this as ‘neo-liberal, Beyonce, feminist-cancer,’ and rant about the personal wounds you are trying to heal from classic ‘entitled gold digging whores,’ we are going to keep working,” Bumble said. “We are going to continue to build a world that makes small-minded, misogynist boys like you feel outdated.” Yas, yas, yas.
“We are going to hope that one day, you come around. We hope that the hate and resentment welling up inside of you will subside and you’ll be able to engage in everyday conversations with women without being cowardice to their power,” they wrapped up. “But until that day comes, Connor, consider yourself blocked from Bumble.” Mic drop.
Bumble employees aren’t the only ones showing support for Ashley. Twitter saw some new clever, all-telling hashtags — #ImWithAshley and #LaterConnor.
Virtual high five to the Bumble employees and big hug to Ashley for having to be put through such rubbish!