Job Titles of the Future: Chief Detonators Wanted

Note: This is an interactive post… Well, read first, be entertained and inspired and then respond.

I recently found a website in a book that is really interesting. The main reason I went to the website was because it was mentioned that the website listed “job titles of the future”. Sounded entertaining. Plus, these days the titles “janitor” or “human resource manager” aren’t very thrilling, exciting, or something that makes you jump out of your seat and say “I want that job!” What if we all had cool job titles? What if we changed our job titles? By how much would our work ethic, our effort increase if we had a title we enjoyed? This is not to say that we aren’t productive now, but I bet somewhere there is a study that correlates a person’s job title and their satisfaction and/or productivity in that position.

For example, I am a teacher. I once taught elementary school Spanish. I was pretty satisfied with “educator” or “Spanish teacher”. I have qualifiers in that title and we are ALL “teachers”. It would be pretty cool to be called a “cultural specialist” or “language advocate” or something. Presently I teach a global studies class. What would the future title of that job be? While I think on that, check out these titles I found at Fast Company…

• C3PO – Chief People, Progress, and Potential Officer (translation – human resource manager)
• Director of Bringing the Cool People In (translation – staffing director)
• Chief Zookeeper (translation – CEO – this title in particular related to some kind of website related to a zoo, however, aren’t all companies in some ways, a zoo?)
• Minister of Comedy (translation – graphic designer – this was a guy who made videos/print material for a company and used his gift of humor to do so.)
• Idea Ambassador (translation – Vice President of Accounts – basically, the job is to champion the good ideas.)
• Head Monster (translation – CEO – this guy started a company named Monster Cable Products)
• Necessary Evil (translation – manager – this person worked at a tech company making sure things got done on time – knew tech geeks there might not be thrilled, hence the name.)
• VP of Happiness (translation – VP of organizational development – keep the people happy, sing to them when they’re down.)
• Katalyst (translation – innovation director – inspire and motivate new ways of thinking.)
• Keeper of the Magic (translation – director of programming – someone who makes things happen like streaming online education…who do you trace it all back to?)
• Master of Madness (translation – chairman – using title to cultivate creativity.)
• Director, Ethical Hacking (translation – consultant – helps companies find places of vulnerability within their business.)
• Vibe Evolver (translation – publisher/manager – leader has to keep good vibes in the work environment to keep development up.)
• The Truth (translation – project manager – maintains and is aware of all elements of a project and no one can contradict what the truth knows…)
• Troublemaker (translation – policy analyst – as in, if there’s a mistake or something has to be checked and someone or something is wrong, they’ll cause a ruckus and point it out.)
• Chief Detonator (translation – PR manager – because after all, isn’t the job of a manager to set off and ignite great ideas?)
• The Voice (translation – web designer – job of a web designer is to be the voice of a company, right?)

Pretty awesome and amusing. There are more if you look up “job titles of the future” in the search box. Does this mean a children’s director in an organization could now have the title “Big Kid” or could a writer be called an “Escape Artist” for their way of transporting us to different places and times in their stories? Would a history teacher become a “Time Traveler”? Is a lab worker a “Mad Scientist”?

So I’m curious: What is your current job title and what should be the job title of the future for your position? What is the job title of the future for “Spanish teacher” or “Global Studies teacher”? Right now I’m thinking I’ll call myself a “Tour Guide/Director” though “Flight Attendant” and “The Gatekeeper” have a nice ring to them as well…

You can read more from Lindsey Gallagher on her blog.

Feature image via.