How To Look Like You Showered When You Really Didn’t!
Grungy goddess K-Stew may wear more eyeliner and Converse sneakers than I could ever pull off, but dayum, the gurl’s got the “dirty hair, I don’t care” look down down pat! I mean, I can’t go even two days of my full-fledge rebellion against the ‘poo without my locks going into complete grease trap hell. However, since the beauty gospel tells us we should shampoo only two to three times a week, here’s my latest how-to on managing the greasies and looking like you effin’ showered when lord knows you really didn’t.
Rita Hazan Root Concealer ($24, sephora.com)
Okay…the rumors are absolutely true! I’m not a natural blonde. What can I say? I always liked to think I was a blonde trapped in a brunette’s body, anyway. Yes, I admit I like to bask in my peroxide glory a little too much, (confidence ain’t snobbery, ya know) but I’ll also tell you that daily shampooing kicks my color in the ass! Between brassiness and black roots sprouting up like weeds, I’ve been DYING for a beauty breakthrough to get me through the purgatory of waiting between dye jobs. That was my life before I met the Rita Hazan Root Concealer.
Luckily, this small tube of nirvana has been absolute godsend these past few weeks. Concealing even those hideous macaroni and cheese looking strands, (yep that’s what happens when gorgeous blonde color fades) this temporary root covering spray is amazingly perfect as it adds just the right amount color you need and stays put until your next shampoo. Phew! My blonde hair fund can breathe a little.
Batiste Dry Shampoo ($8.99, batistehair.com)
Please don’t worry, I won’t let your gorgeous head of hair get Severus Snape greasy cause not only is that really really gross (never knew how old Severus managed it) but duh! That’s how breakouts start, Gigglers! Now, dry shampoo may look like a million and one other things than actual shampoo, but don’t fret, beauty queens. I promise it won’t hurt you and turn your hair a very awkward shade of purple. As a matter of fact, most dry shampoos (especially this adorbs Batiste one) tackle greasiness almost instantly and add a soft and clean scent to hair when shampooing clearly isn’t possible. Beauty traditionalists, let me remind you again: don’t panic! Dry shampoo won’t replace the old shampoo and conditioning routine, but it will get your tresses through that homestretch until you and that new bottle of Herbal Essence shampoo get all lovey dovey again.
Effortless Hair Extensions ($79.99, effortlessextensions.com)
You’re neither a Kardashian nor a Real Housewife, so why wear extensions? Well if this whole ‘dirty hair, don’t care’ thing is giving you some serious heebie jeebies, I say, WHY THE HECK NOT? Sorry Charlie, I can’t curl my hair J-Simpson style, so when I let my coif get super laz, I look to these synthetic extensions to help cheat my way a little bit. Correction. Maybe cheat a whole lot. With a totally tubular application (look at that awesome hook yo!), those dirty-‘do days just got a little more reality-diva glam.
Kelly & Jones Sample Flight ($15, kellyandjones.com)
If you’re still reeling from my lack of mentioning that you could be prone to potentially smelling during this whole ‘screw the ‘poo’ thing, then your wish is granted. This sample pack of wine-inspired scents is getting me through the worst of shampooing withdrawals. Whether it’s Sauvignon Tuesdays or Merlot Wednesdays like your every-day-of-the-week undies, there’s a scent for every stinking day of the week. Dear Kelly Jones: You’re A Goddess! Smelly girls (like me) everywhere are for ever in your debt.
Lavanila The Healthy Deodorant ($18, lavanila.com)
Part deux of smelling fabulicious? Gotta be deodorant, babycakes! Call me a deodorant elitist, but any odor slayer has to be Goldilocks just-right in order for me to use it. That means no added chemicals, aluminum or ingredients mankind probably can’t pronounce. Yup, that means you cyclopentasiloxane. So yeah, did I mention that any of the Healthy Deodorants by the geniuses at Lavanila are more than qualified to join my league of extraordinary deodorants? Not only are they free of toxiest of toxic chemicals but they smell like one big happy cloud of vanilla. Sighhhhh.
Goody Double Wear Collection ($9.99, target.com)
I shall not tell a beauty lie kids, a good headband can get you through anything and I mean just about anything. Not too long ago, I fell head over heels for the budgetista approved Double Wear collection by Goody. How does it help you feign a nice shampoo? Easy! Sculpt your hair into one adorable topknot and dress it up with one of these too-cute-to-handle headbands. GORGEOUS!
*Images Courtesy of Rita Hazan, Batiste Hair Care, Effortless Extensions, Kelly&Jones, Lavanila and Goody Hair.
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