There’s a brand new “Harry Potter” chapter — except this one was written with predictive text

Wizarding world fans, rejoice! A brand new chapter from the beloved Harry Potter series has just been released — but it comes with a major catch: it wasn’t actually written by J.K. Rowling.

Harry Potter and the Portrait of What Looked Like a Large Pile of Ash — if the hilariously bizarre title weren’t enough of a hint — is a new chapter from the magical series completely written using predictive keyboards. Robotics company Botnik used keyboards trained in the style of Rowling — as in, they were trained in Rowling’s dialogue and narration style using all seven Harry Potter books — and created a whole new Harry Potter chapter. The result is both harrowing and hilarious.

In Large Pile of Ash, Voldemort and a group of Death Eaters have infiltrated Hogwarts for a secret meeting. Naturally, Harry, Ron, and Hermione decide to eavesdrop on the meeting, and a confrontation between the Death Eaters and our favorite Hogwarts students ensues. While this definitely sounds akin to something that could have taken place in the Harry Potter books — and is actually not too far off events that did occur  — the added level of outlandishness certainly adds something to Rowling’s world.

Here’s a preview of the hilarious chapter:

"'What about Ron magic?' offered Ron. To Harry, Ron was a loud, slow, and soft bird. Harry did not like to think about birds. 'Death Eaters are on top of the castle!" Ron bleated, quivering. Ron was going to be spiders. He just was. He wasn't proud of that, but it was going to be hard to not have spiders all over his body after all is said and done. 'Look,' said Hermione. 'Obviously there are loads of Death Eaters in the castle. Let's listen in on their meetings.'"

The action-packed, four-page chapter is filled with everything: A confrontation between the Death Eaters and the main trio, tension between Harry and Ron, a stand-off with Voldemort, and an end of term feast in the Great Hall. We seriously recommend checking out the bonkers chapter for yourself.

Sure, this may not be canon, but it’s pretty damn close — in some respects. Rowling hasn’t yet responded to the new chapter, though we have a feeling she’ll approve of it and maybe even give it “ten points to Gryffindor for sheer cheek.”

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