21 funny names for “vagina” that will make you laugh, no matter how hard you resist

By Brianne hogan

March 2, 2018

By Brianne hogan

March 2, 2018

If you think about it, “vagina” is a pretty funny name on its own. But still, it’s a name that a lot of people have a hard time saying out loud. So, instead, we’ve resorted to calling it a slew of things that are ridiculous and silly, but also pretty funny.

In fact there are so many funny names for “vagina,” there’s a whole monologue about it in Eve Ensler’s famous play, The Vagina Monologues. In it, Ensler lists regional terms, like “mimi” and “schmende,” food names, such as “split knish” and “tamale,” and even ones that just make no sense — “possible” and “fanny boo,” for instance.

Perhaps your family had its own funny names for “vagina,” or you heard one from a friend when you were a kid. Or maybe you’ve created your own ~alternate~ word because you just can’t get comfortable with “vagina,” or want an option that’s not quite so clinical.

If you’re looking for some funny names for vagina that don’t involve saying the word “vagina,” then here are some ridiculous terms for our “lady bits” that will make you laugh, if nothing else.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUDjB0cjots

Vulvarine

Popularized by the gals on Broad City, this term sounds either like a weird fruit or a badass superhero.

Pink/Bearded Clam

Who knew a sea creature was so not sexy? (Everyone.)

Red Wagon

Miranda Lambert sang about. Why is it red? Is it irritated? Inflamed? Well, either way, we won’t look at our childhood mode of transportation the same.