Everything I need to know, I learned from Rory Gilmore

In case you are not a human that hangs out on the Internet (or in coffee shops!), I should probably let you know that Gilmore Girls is coming back to our beloved Netflix for a four episode revival. We get to see the Gilmores again! During the holidays! All of the holidays! Who is pregnant? Which terrible boyfriend is Rory dating? Are Luke and Lorelai still a thing? (Okay we basically know they are.) How is Emily without Richard? (Terrible, like the rest of us!)

So obviously, I’m going to talk about Rory — but first, if you guys pay VERY CLOSE ATTENTION TO ME, a stranger on the web, you might know that I actually had never watched Gilmore Girls until very recently. So I am new to this — all of this — just in time to jump on the bandwagon for the revival.

WARNING: I love Rory, but she drives me crazy — so these lessons might be a little condescending at times! Okay go!

EINTKILF Rory Gilmore

Books are cool

Though I have my issues with Rory, one of the things that I truly love about her is her love for books/school/academia. Listen, like a lot of girls my age, I actually do not relate to Rory in this aspect. I do love books, but I was not a “nose stuck in the books” kind of girl. I am not Hermione, I am not Belle, and I am certainly not Rory. That being said, it doesn’t mean I can’t admire her for her drive. Rory went to college — choosing between Yale and Harvard — for journalism, working through academic struggles like being told she “doesn’t have it” by her boyfriend’s established father, being the editor of the school newspaper, and, you know, stealing a yacht and dropping out for a while. Like you do.

I was never the “Smart One” of my friends, but I was the “Driven One” in my family. Rory matters because (though Alexis Bledel is and always has been stunningly beautiful), nerdy girls are important for us to see. BOOKS ARE GREAT.

Moms are also cool

No one in the world has a relationship like Lorelai and Rory — and even if you think you and your mom do — you still probably don’t talk as quickly as them! I love my mother, but we are nothing like Lorelai and Rory. Lorelai is a young mom, they’re both cute and funny, and the show is fictional — it’s a magic combination that really works to their advantage.

Jokes aside though, the way that Rory loves, admires, and respects her mother is something we can all be inspired by. Though this show frustrates me on a lot of levels, Rory’s love for her mother can always spring a tear in my eye.

How to be a friend

Okay, don’t be mad at me, but I actually think Rory was kind of a bad friend to Lane. Lane has literally just discovered she is pregnant after her very first time having sex, and Rory is sitting in a bookstore complaining about not being sure how to send a sexy text. I mean, okay, that’s what friends are for. My own best friend told me she was hungry after I told her something much more important than that — but I still think Lane was kind of ripped off in their friendship balance.

However Rory was, for the most part, a really good friend to Paris. Paris is insanely difficult to be friends with — and I say that with love in my heart because she is a character I always, always love, no matter what. Rory had no reason to be friends with Paris after their initial “getting to know each other” period, but she was always there for her. She helped her dress for dates when she was too insecure to do so herself — in fact, she hides in a closet because Paris assumed her date would be more interested in Rory. She puts up with Paris’ well, everything, and in turn, Paris puts up with Rory. And honestly, what are friends for?

Family matters

So obviously Rory and Lorelai love each other very much. That is not up for debate, even though they fight sometimes, and even when they don’t talk for a while. But without Rory, Lorelai would be even more dysfunctional than she already is. Though initially a bargain for her mom and dad to pay for Rory’s private schooling, Rory is the reason Lorelai reunites with her parents, the lovely Emily and Richard Gilmore. Their Friday night dinners exist because of Rory, and they continue because of Rory. When Rory and her mother are fighting, she turns to her grandparents. She eventually chooses Yale (her grandparent’s alma mater!) which means everything to her grandparents, especially to Richard.

Beyond even that, though Christopher is the worst, Rory is the focal point in ensuring that he mostly sticks around. Christopher is really the worst though — so maybe this is a negative point.

Dating is not easy

Before I watched Gilmore Girls, I was under the impression that Rory bounced back and forth between Dean and Jess; everything I had ever heard was “Team Jess” or “Team Dean.” I literally never knew a person named Logan existed in this fandom until a few months ago — WHICH IS WEIRD YOU GUYS because Logan is the only person she even seriously dates!

I know Dean was a big thing in the early seasons — but he was a high school boyfriend, and everyone knows those guys matter less and less the older we get! But anyway, I get why Jess is appealing. And though I hate Logan, he really is the only person anyone should be “Team This Person.” Are you mad at me yet? Okay, wait for it.

I like Jess the most if I have to choose — but that’s really only because he’s the cutest. And because he’s related to Luke. And because he reads books and wears leather or whatever. But he wasn’t a good boyfriend to Rory. This all being said, Rory does not do anything wrong here. She is incredibly young, and many of us date people we shouldn’t have dated. Even more so, we date people that don’t make sense for us at the time in which we meet them. And that’s okay! Everyone running across the room to stand under a sign with “Team [Insert Man’s Name Here]” is just having a good time with a TV show, but it should be noted that dating sucks and that also none of these guys are all that great, if great at all.

I often think about my life in terms of television. I always have. If I were a show, who would everyone be rooting for? My fear — and this is the only time I’m a Rory — is that everyone has picked a guy to root for only because that’s what we do in television shows, and not because that is the right answer.

Anyway, I am one of you now. I am very excited to watch Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life.