“Cuffing Season” Is A Thing, As It Turns Out

At first when I saw the term “Cuffing Season” on the Internet, I thought, “Aw, that’s kind of cute. There’s a season for cufflinks!” I promptly added “dinosaur cufflinks” to my Christmas list for my boyfriend, not realizing cuffing season is definitely not about cufflinks. Cuffing season is a portion of the year when men shed their summer bachelor skin and start to feel lonely as the weather turns colder. I guess it’s been sociologically studied by the Internet, so that must mean something.

Supposedly guys, hung-over from summer’s laid back whimsicality, decide they don’t actually want all that “freedom” by the time winter comes around. In order to find a girl to keep from freezing their asses off alone and eating microwavable steak every night*, they “begin to do what their species often refer to as, ‘cuff,’ a classic spin move where August bachelors court Autumn bachelorettes in hopes of securing a ‘cuddle buddy.’”

This is how cuffing works:

Toward the end of summer and the beginning of fall, you might notice that dude you were talking to at your friend’s beach party has been stopping by the café in which you work. This might seem weird to you, since there are literally twenty coffee shops in your town, but you’re most likely not over-analyzing. He might just be trying to stake his claim before anyone else does.

Is your ex sending you photos of his dog? Asking you how the school year is going? Classic cuffing behavior, apparently.

The last few weeks of October are supposedly when the most aggressive cuffing behavior occurs. Maybe it’s all the pumpkin spice getting to his head or the chilly Halloween weather. This is prime time to cuff, so keep your wrists safe. If you don’t want to be a “cuffing victim”, then avoid answering his cute text messages and flirty e-mails.

According to several studies**, cuffing season lasts from November to March. During this time period, your now boyfriend is taking you out to dinner, introducing you to all his friends and maybe even his parents. He’s even using the term “girlfriend” which makes you wonder if he means it.

However, you start noticing he isn’t as good at responding to texts as he was a couple months ago. His e-mails are generally comprised of one or two words, such as “ok” and “cool”. He starts becoming more and more busy, working late hours and studying by himself. Alas, cuffing season is over.

Obviously, this whole phenomenon is caveman logic, and even though I’m sure it actually happens, it doesn’t mean you should let yourself get taken advantage of. Also, not every guy who happens to be interested in you is abiding by the cufflink season rules.

However, if you feel like dipping into a temporary fling because a)it’s cold, b)you dumped your summer fling, and c)you just damn well feel like it, then I encourage you to do whatever you want. Cuff a guy. Go out with him for several months. Enjoy his company. Don’t let yourself get attached. Or do. Remember, there are no real rules for dating.

*Totally joking!

**These don’t actually exist

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