Country singer Jana Kramer responds to mommy-shaming with an important reminder

Learning to care for another human being is hard enough as it is without the added pressure of mommy-shaming. After all, there’s no such thing as the perfect parent or the perfect child, which can in turn make parenting a journey that’s both difficult and daunting. This is something country singer and actress Jana Kramer can relate to.

After revealing that she prepared for motherhood by doing her fair share of research, Jana states, “Along with that research comes advice. Some you ask for, some you don’t. Regardless, there is never a shortage of advice for parents. Home birth, hospital birth, natural or drugs? And then when the baby comes: To swaddle or not to swaddle?” She explains that questions such as these lead to countless opinions – with only some of them being solicited and comforting.

As for the unsolicited comments, Jana came face-to-face with them after she posted an image of baby food on her Instagram. She captioned the photo: “And it begins #babyfood.” In response, the new mom explains that she received comments such as “Make your own. It’s cheaper and way healthier ;)” and “You can always make your own. … To do what’s right for your baby don’t listen to anybody else’s opinion.”

Jana’s Instagram comments made her realize that raising a child can be surrounded by tension. “Breast milk or formula? Well, like so many moms I didn’t have that option. Shame on me #1: I could only offer Jolie a bottle. She is now 4 months, and I am happy to say she’s doing just fine, despite the lack of breast milk,” wrote Jana on Motto, adding that she also felt shamed after going to the grocery store to buy products she felt were right for herself and her daughter.

“Did you know that we are now expected to birth our children, nurse our children and then make their baby food from scratch?” asks Jana. “Hmmm, maybe I should also farm the fruits and vegetables? I should wake early, tend to the garden, get on the tour bus, go to sound check, pick my produce, puree the food, freeze it and then feed Jolie, hit the stage—and do it all over again after only a few hours’ sleep. Oh, and while we are at it, let’s be pretty and sexy, as well.”

While Kramer admits that the above example is extreme, she’s trying to make an important point: That parents everywhere should do what is best for their families. “I hope for one thing and one thing only: That my child can grow to be healthy and happy,” states Jana. “That when she turns 18, she is kind.” The singer continues by saying she hopes her daughter will never shame someone for doing their very best.

Jana concludes that all parents and children are different, but there is beauty in that. With this in mind, all human beings should stick together in the name of support – not shame.