Chipotle is closing every single location, but don’t freak out
What if you woke up and found yourself in a world where there was no Chipotle? Well, that’s going to be a reality on February 8th when every single Chipotle location plans to shutter its doors to have a national all-employee meeting about the E. Coli outbreak that’s been taking over their delicious burritos.
Before you rush to your nearest location to stuff your face (E. Coli be damned) before the fateful day, do not worry. The chain will reopen again on the 9th, hopefully with an airtight plan to rid their food of bacteria (and prevent it from ever showing up) so we can once again enjoy carnitas and guac without fear.
Despite the dire circumstances, Chipotle is confident that this nightmare will soon be over. CEO Steve Ellis explained his optimism in a statement:
This meeting also precedes a new marketing campaign which hopes to bring back potentially wary customers. Details are still unclear, but we know they’ll be hitting our TV screens, newspapers, and even our mailboxes. If any of the campaign efforts involve free burritos, then say no more. It will be like we never even left.
(Image via MANDEL NGAN / Getty Images)