Brogurt, a yogurt for men, is FINALLY here

Today in existing food unnecessarily marketed to men, we bring you: brogurt, the macho version of yogurt dudes can eat without wanting to die of embarrassment! And no, we are definitely not joking (come on, April Fools’ was two weeks ago!).

What constitutes as a masculine yogurt? Well let us tell ya. It’s yogurt but served in larger containers with manly logos like bulls and mammoths. Also, brogurt contains more protein because guys work out WAY more than ladies (OBVIOUSLY) and they need all the extra protein they can get. Powerful Yogurt, for instance, holds eight ounces and has 21 grams of protein, while Chobani only has a dainty 5.3 ounces of yogurt and only 15 grams of protein.


New Zealand apparently has developed its own dudely yogurt called Mammoth Supply Co. Its slogan, according to Food and Wine, is “This is men’s yoghurt and you are a man. Now find a spoon, fork or spade and dig in.” Mammoth yogurt, however, is not as mighty as Powerful Yogurt —it only has 14 grams of protein (says MyFitnessPal).


It doesn’t stop there though. We not only have brogurt, we have brodetergent. That’s right. You can wash your clothes AND do it like a MAN at the same time. Behold: Hero Clean. It’s “built for men.”


Obviously, the gendered (and sexist) products are pretty unnecessary. Plus, we can ALL agree that Fage and Tide would beat any brogurt or brosoap outta the water.