11 hilarious best friend quotes from “Broad City”

If there’s ever been a show that perfectly captured the joys and hilarious struggles of female friendship, it’s Broad City. Abbi and Ilana’s friendship is SO real that we can’t help but watch our favorite episodes over and over again. And lucky for all of us, its fourth season just premiered on Comedy Central. It’s been said before, but it deserves repeating: Yas, kween.

Although it would be nearly impossible to pick all of our most-loved Broad City moments, we rounded up some of the most memorable. And just FYI, you’re gonna want to send these quotes to the Ilana or Abbi in your life.

1BFFs just know

Ilana: “I know you from your ass better than I know your face.”

2It’s a Damon/Affleck kind of friendship

Abbi: “We’re technically homeless right now.”
Ilana: “Ben Affleck was homeless for a night for a charity…We’re, like, doing that, just involuntarily.”
Abbi: “Yeah, we’re just a regular Matt and Ben.”

3BFFs give the best compliments

Ilana: “Your ass looks incredible…”
Abbi: “Yeah?”
Ilana: “Your head and body too. But we all know who’s the star of the show here.”

4No one thinks they’re a Charlotte

Abbi: “You know what? I’m really a Miranda-Carrie too, I think with a little bit of Charlotte, even though she really annoys me.”
Ilana: “Who am I? Honey, I have a cyst on my uterus and I need to get fucked until it pops.”

5There is no TMI among besties

Ilana: “You want me to FaceTime from the bathroom?”
Abbi: “Yeah.”
Ilana: “Cool…Just switch to wifi.”

6It’s OK to have a secret crush on your best friend

  • Ilana: “Let’s get married!
  • Abbi: “What was that?”
  • Ilana: “What?”
  • Abbi: “You said something.”

7No jealously here

Guy: “You have a friend?”
Ilana (about Abbi): “Yeah — chocolate-brown eyes, ass of an angel.”

8Best friends will state the obvious, if need be

Abbi (to Ilana): “You just pulled a bag of pot out of your vagina.”

9You gotta tell your bestie when they need to relax

Ilana: “I think you deserve, like, an ‘Abbi Bueller’s Day Off.’”

10Drinking buddies forever

Ilana: “Dude, I would follow you into hell, brother!”
Abbi: I would take you on my shoulders, like, I’d strap you up, and I’d be like ‘let’s go to hell.’”


Ilana: “To my frond…to the ond.”