An ode to sweatpants

Dear Sweatpants,

I’m just going to come right out and say it. I love you. I always have and I always will. The way you make me feel is unrivaled by any other piece of clothing. What else do I wear that is as warm, as soft, or as cuddly? It is a joy wearing you.

After a long, hard day, I know I can count on you to make me feel comfortable and relaxed. This is why, when I come home, I often put you on immediately.

I don’t have to do anything special for you. Skinny jeans are like someone I’ve just met at a party, or a new neighbor: We have to engage in pleasant small talk with while we get to know each other. But you and I, Sweatpants, share the easy intimacy of childhood best friends or a longtime-married couple. We don’t have to put on airs or try to impress each other. We love each other just as we are. We have a great time simply hanging out, being ourselves together. Reading a book or watching TV with you is especially fun.

You aren’t rigid or stubborn, demanding that I adjust to your specifications. You are admirably flexible. You work around me. That is so sweet and accommodating of you, Sweatpants.

I love how you come in a multitude of colors and styles. Sometimes you have words or numbers on you, such as the name of a sports team or the year a person was born or graduated. I’ve even seen you adorned with a bunch kittens playing with a ball of yarn! Too cute, Sweatpants. Sometimes you have pockets. Sometimes you have paint splotches on you because you are great to wear during home decoration projects. You are so unique, Sweatpants!

Your approachable, crowd-pleasing qualities are far-reaching. You look adorable on little kids. You look just right on airplane travelers or fatigued road-trippers. You are well-received by people young and old, rich and poor, male and female. Some people mostly enjoy you in the winter, when the snow is falling and the fireplace is roaring. Other people appreciate you year-round. (Guilty as charged! You’re just too lovable to be kept in a closet for months at a time.)

Despite your popularity, you are still humble and modest. You are very considerate of my wallet, and are never too expensive. When you are brand new, it feels like I am wearing a cloud! Even when you get older and lose some of that cashmere-soft quality, I still don’t want to give you up. I’m attached. You’re loyal to me, and I’m loyal to you.

This ode to you is just my way of saying thanks, Sweatpants. Thanks for the good times that I’ve had with you in the past and for the good times I’ll continue to have with you in the future. Now let’s go watch TV together.

Holly Archibald is a freelance writer, lover of music, enjoyer of dogs, admirer of nature, drinker of coffee, frequent wearer of sweatpants, and viewer of cute animal videos on YouTube. You can follow her on Twitter (@hollsthesmalls)

[Image via iStock]

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