7 reasons *not* to have a destination wedding, as fun as it sounds in theory

We get it: Destination weddings seem like a lot of fun, but if you love your friends and family, please think twice before doing this to them. Fun as they are, there are so many reasons why you shouldn’t have a destination wedding that it can be hard to know where to start. If you’re going to have a destination wedding, there are a lot of things to consider, and you might not like all of them. Trust us, your guests might be grumbling about things, too.

A destination wedding can be a huge burden to other people — and to you and your partner.

Of course, people want to celebrate you and your marriage! They aren’t jerks. But they have lives, too, and nothing is more bridezilla than insisting people travel across the country (or further!), at their own expense possibly, to attend your wedding.

If you really want to get married somewhere far, far away, maybe you should just elope? Don’t be offended, but here’s why we think you should reconsider that destination wedding.

1You’re asking a LOT.

A destination means that you’re asking people to travel. As much as they love you, getting off of work for more than a quick weekend could be really tough for some of your guests. It’s not that your grandma wouldn’t want to go to Mexico, but travel is not easy for some people, Granny and maybe your friends who are new parents or pregnant. Before you decide to have a destination wedding, maybe take a moment to consider how doable it is for all the important people in your life.

2It’s expensive.

One of the reasons it can be asking a lot is that your friends might not have the cash to travel to the south of France for your wedding, or they have to put away cash they would spend on their own vacations for you. Maybe that’s fun for them; Maybe it’s not. To ensure that everyone you love can make it, you might have to pony up for some of your friends’ or family members’ travel expenses. You have to make sure that goes into your wedding budget.

3Your wedding might be small.

Because you’re asking a lot and the price can be a barrier to entry, your wedding might be smaller than you want. That can also be a perk of a destination wedding, depending on your expectations. You might have to dig into your bridal party reserves if some of your squad can’t make it.

4You risk not being at your best.

Travel can seriously mess up your immune system. No matter where you go, you risk coming down with a cold before your big day. Not to be a Debbie Downer, but that’s a real concern. Make sure you’re beefing up on your vitamins and sleep before your travel date so you aren’t sneezing and nasty on the day of the actual wedding.

5There could be fewer gifts.

Because people are spending a ton of cash upfront just to be there, or the wedding is small because you and your partner are paying for everyone, you will definitely be getting fewer presents if you move the locale somewhere far away. And what the heck is the point of a wedding if you can’t get things and money from people who barely know you? Yes, a travel experience is worth more than a Vitamix — or is it?

6That’s a lot of family time.

If you love your relatives, we’re happy for you. But a destination wedding means mucho bonding time. Can you handle your parents and extended family for that long? It’s possible enough cocktails served in coconuts will make it easier, but that’s totally your call.

7And you cut the honeymoon short.

If you go away for your wedding and bring the whole family, you sort of cut into honeymoon time. And do you really want your parents on your honeymoon? Always do what you want, but remember that destination weddings are a big commitment. And honestly, doesn’t your wedding have enough commitment associated with it already?