Your Friends' Babies are YOUR Babies Too

Are your friends having babies? I feel like all my friends are having babies. I support this wholeheartedly and with enough enthusiasm to power an old-timey locomotive.

Now, a lot of people get uneasy when everyone around them starts breeding. This is because they are short-sighted, unimaginative people who are too busy lacking vision to see the big picture. While they’re concerned with how they’re aging, as seen through the lens of their friends’ maturity, and indulging their self-pity because they aren’t the ones having the actual babies, they are, in fact, missing a great opportunity.

Hi. Babies. B-A-B-I-E-S. All-access pass to Cuteville without the hassles of gestation, lactation, and 3am diaper changes. All we have to do is be the fun aunt (or “aunt” if your legit family hasn’t reproduced yet), spoil them, make them love us, watch them gurgle joyously and give them back when their little lips start to quiver and their little eyes bulge in little baby-panic.

Even their sadness is cute. Don’t they know that their earth-shattering fear and discomfort over anything and everything is baseless? If I was a baby, I’d enjoy having no real worries and being hugged and comforted for freaking out every time I thought my mom disappeared when, in fact, all I did was close my eyes for a minute. They don’t even have to burp! People rub their little backs and do it for them!

Then they go through this phase. Glimpses of it show up later, in toddler hood, but around the six-month mark (or whenever their vision stops being blurry), they get this Look. You’ll be holding them and having a silly old time, and suddenly they’ll give you the Look. Their eyes bore straight in yours, with this piercing gaze like they hold the key to the universe and understand how it relates to your measly little adult life.

They size you up, wordlessly communicating that they know all about your past, present and future with that Look, but by the time they start figuring out how speech works, it is gone. Maybe it’s because their newfound ability to focus leaves an impression on their little vision centers, creating the illusion of insightful gazing. Maybe they’ve watched too much Baby Einstein and have become disillusioned with the initial excitement of defined shapes and lines.

Or maybe babies are just MAGIC.


Julia Gazdag is a writer, photographer, and breakfast taco whisperer. She hails from Budapest and has lived in New York, LA and Austin before moving to Portland, OR where she is now enjoying pine trees and bridges. She is quite fond of dinosaurs. She also prefers eggs, potatoes, and pico de gallo in her breakfast tacos. She writes for The College Crush and Off Our Chests. You can find her on twitter (@juliagazdag), facebook, and vyou. Her photos can be found on


  • Zsófi Steiner

    true! Having children of your own takes away the opportunity to enjoy the best parts and leave the hard things for someone else. It’ll come back with the grandchildren I hope. But untill that we love the aunts and “aunts”, uncles and “uncles” who give us a few minutes rest :) By the way, the beauty above is my little princess!

    • Julia Gazdag

      Thank you for letting me photograph her endlessly and incessantly for this past half a decade. Hopefully I’ll have a better lens by the time she graduates high school.

  • Americo Polk

    Just found out one of my best friends and his wife we I adore are pregnant and he and I like to have a good time and he was so relieved with how happy I was for him and his wife and I think a lot of dudes need to read this

  • Jenny Lonussen

    I agree! I’m an auntie and my nephew, niece (& unborn nephew) are a little bit my babies/kids too. I often babysit them, hang out with them, I even have my own secret handshake with the kids (my nephew is 3 & my niece is 10).. Sure when I babysit I try to discipline them too, I mean ya gotta have limits but you really get to enjoy the funside of having kids with little/none of the bad/difficult stuff.

    And I agree babies are magic :-)

  • Zsófi Steiner

    excusez-moi, she is not half a decade old yet! Just turned 4! 😀

    • Julia Gazdag

      I was rounding up, oh-KAY?

  • Rebecca Lynn

    My best friend’s four-year-old decided last week that I was “mama” and she was “Becca” and asked if he could move in with me. I reveled. And when he decided he didn’t want to take a bath that night, he was all hers again. Oh, the beauty of having kids who have friends.

  • Heather Askew

    I agree wholeheartedly and completely know the “look” you are talking about. I will always remember that look from my friend’s daughter Maya the day I met her when she was 6 months old. You are a great writer my friend!

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