Lies I Tell My Daughter

"We Have To Take Our Food To Go, The Restaurant's Closing"

I admit, I dread taking my daughter to restaurants. Once in a blue moon, she’ll behave, but for the most part, she doesn’t sit still, drops food under the table and tries to pick it up and eat it, and after I order whatever it is she asks for she looks at it and says she wants something else.

When our waiter comes up to take our order Sunny will say, “I want coffee and a piece of cake please”. If we’re in a restaurant with booths, she hangs over the other person’s side of the booth and just stares at them while I frantically plead with her to sit down.

At least while she’s staring at the people whose booth she’s practically joined, she’s quiet. But I really don’t know what’s worse- the temporary moment of her quietly staring at the old people eating their Denver Omelets or randomly announcing at at the top of her voice, that she needs to poo poo while people are eating.

You know what’s not fun? Watching Sunny take all of the Splendas and tearing them open and pouring them out one by one. Also, I know this is weird, but she begs me to drink her apple juice out of a wine glass so it looks exactly white wine and I’ll be getting mean looks from people who think I’m drinking wine with my four year old daughter at a Cheesecake Factory.  Then sometimes when we’re out, she’ll say really loudly, “Mommy, where’s my wine?”

Of course, if you ask her, she loves going to restaurants. Her favorite part of being in a restaurant is sitting and having a leisurely meal. She feels really grown up and like a character out of one of her “Fancy Nancy” books.

Do you blame me for wanting to take things to go???


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