— wedding bells

I know wedding rings won't automatically keep a marriage healthy — but I still love mine


“I don’t understand the point of wedding rings,” I’ve overheard several people say recently. “What are they supposed to do? It’s not like they magically keep people from cheating.”

Whether it’s a simple gold band or a giant gem worthy of the movies, the act of wearing a ring doesn’t automatically make someone’s relationship more secure or committed — and it certainly doesn’t keep a person from cheating on their partner. Wedding rings don’t save marriages, and they’re not a sign that a relationship is healthy or loving.

I can understand why some couples decide wedding rings aren’t really their style. I mean, it’s not like having a ring on your left hand can really do anything. To my great disappointment and confusion, sporting a wedding ring doesn’t even seem to scare off the creepy men aggressively asking for my phone number or a date.

But even though wedding rings don’t make a marriage, I still love mine.

wedding rings
GraphicaArtis/Getty Images

My blue topaz wedding ring belonged to my great-grandma, and my husband’s ring has been passed down through several generations in his family. Our rings help us feel connected to our families — specifically, family members we’ve lost.

My great-grandpa gave my great-grandma the little gold ring with a blue stone on their one-year anniversary. It was just the beginning of their adventures.

“We had a lot of adventures together,” my grandma told me once.

And they did — walking on the Great Wall of China, taking a tiny boat up the Inside Passage in Alaska — and when they got tired of suburban life, retiring to the country where they lived sandwiched between apple farms and ranches.

When I miss my grandparents, it helps to have a piece of jewelry that reminds me of them. Plus, it reminds me how they were so happily married for such a very long time. It’s an encouraging example of what a marriage can look like.

But even if my husband and I didn’t have rings that had been passed down through our families, I’d still want to wear a wedding ring.

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