Ellie's Top Tweets Top Ten Tweets I Like: Aug 27 – Sept 2 Ellie McElvain

After an excruciating week without the top tweets, I’m back. You guys, I had STUFF to do. I’m a very busy and important lady. Tell everyone you know. Very busy. Very important. Definitely not lazy and bad at task-managing. Without further ado, I present my favorite tweets this week courtesy of some truly fantastic human beings, so read and laugh and follow and tie your shoelaces:

Follow @yoyoha

Follow @molls

Follow @mulaney

Follow @mollyfitz

Follow @iamenidcoleslaw

I urge you to follow @peteholmez and read all about his fake wife Helen.

Follow @jasonmustian

Follow @mollymcnearny

Follow @conanobrienswyf

Follow @dadourianbow

This morning I realized that a toaster oven isn’t just another name for a toaster, but actually a baby oven! Which then opened up a million possibilities: cookies, bacon, a very small sylvia plath doll, ANYTHING!!! Does everyone know about this toaster oven situation? I hope so.

Random Word of the Week: Toaster Oven

Damn straight, I support all working ladies treating themselves to a nice, new toaster oven. Men are temporary, baby ovens are forever.

That’s the scoop for this week! Have a happy weekend, and remember: my opinion totally matters.

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  1. Im pretty sure my toaster oven skills are what made my man fall in love with me. One of my specialties is cooking up dinosaur chicken nuggets.

  2. These tweets make my sad life a little bit better. Thanks for keeping me alive!
    PS. I’m still a little upset that there weren’t any top tweets last week, but I forgive you