Apocalypstick's ApocaLISTTop 10 Sexiest Male MusiciansAlmie Rose

Do you feel like gazing at photos of hot musicians and then arguing over who really is the hottest and who I left out? Great, read on!

10. Mick Jagger, The Rolling Stones

mick jagger young

Totally normal.

To be honest about this whole situation, I only feel obligated to put him on here, he doesn’t really make me swoon. Although, okay, fine, he had about four years where he was actually totally sexy.


9. Kanye West

kanye west

Needs more layers.

Yup, I put Kanye on here. Stop throwing up, I don’t care if you don’t understand.


8. Serge Gainsbourg

I defy you to find a photo of him where he is not holding a cigarette.

Let’s be real, dude’s got a face like the Aggro Crag, but his voice is so sexy and he’s so smart and talented and well-dressed that it doesn’t even matter.


7. Ludwig Van Beethoven 

ludwig van beethoven

Dat ascot.


6. Beck

beck suit

Beck's mom reminded him it was picture day.

For about 20 years Beck looked like a teenager and then BAM, 40. Still hot. Mostly. This one time I saw him in concert and my feet hurt. I think that’s all I got here.


5. Roger Daltrey, The Who

roger daltrey hot

Oh God, he's got the dent thing, I can't resist the dent things.

The Who are not respected enough in this country (USA) and that upsets me, but they kind of walked into that when they sold out to “CSI” and their 6,000 spin-offs. Hopefully they…won’t get fooled again. YYEEEEEEAAAAHHHH!!!


4. George Harrison, The Beatles

I mean, obviously.

He’s got cheekbones that can file your nails.


3. Jarvis Cocker, Pulp

jarvis cocker pulp

I want to sleep with common people like you.

His dance moves are so good that watching him somehow got me pregnant. So weird.


2. Paul McCartney, The Beatles, Wings

Words fail me here, just look at pictures.

paul mccartney with martha

Screw you, dog.


paul mccartney with a baby

Just looking sexy smuggling a baby, no big deal.


paul mccartney drinking

Look I'm just enjoying a vanilla milkshake, or maybe it's a glass of milk, who cares, it's none of your business, look into my eyes.


paul mccartney in the studio

He was a hipster before there were hipsters, boom, hipster paradox.


paul mccartney shirtless

Abs, someone look at his abs.


1. David Bowie

I don’t have to explain this one, just look at all the evidence.

david bowie young

And screw you, Kurt Cobain.


david bowie smiling gif

Fhghgffccsjhf goooo.


david bowie shirt

Oh hey guys, it's just me wearing a t-shirt of me, and then I'm going to put this on a t-shirt.


the man who fell to earth

David Bowie demonstrates proper gun safety.


thin white duke

I don't even know what day it is, who cares, I'm David Bowie, days don't even matter, someone get me a lighter.


Wasn’t this fun? For more photos of hotties, check out Top Ten Old People I’d Like To Date and Ten Photos That Will Make You Want To Fall In Love.


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  1. I really liked seeing Paul, George and Beethoven on the list. Just missed the Bob Dylan :((

  2. I’m so glad you had David Bowie as number 1, and oh gosh, Jarvis Cocker, my god, yes! I love all of these, I love your taste in men. Wow, thank you :)

  3. When I saw The Who on the Live Aid DVD I nearly swooned at the divineness of Roger Daltry!

  4. YES! George Harrison! And YES! David Bowie. Yes a million times!

  5. Ok so David Bowie is spot on. But this list still needs some Cat Stevens.

  6. Jim Morrison!!

  7. YAY for #’s 1 and 2! <3 And I agree with Brit De- where's Morrissey???????!!!!

  8. Morrissey and Freddie Mercury should’ve been on here. Mercury had an 8 octave range and a killer mustache while Morrissey was called The Hair. The Rolling Stones may have been an iconic band, but who would ever really touch Mick Jagger? And seriously? Beethoven? Who are we kidding?

  9. WHAT?!? There is no way Paul McCartney is hotter than George. No offense, Paul, but look at this! http://capslove.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/4.jpg

  10. This list was really not what I expected ;). However, I do think Fyfe Dangerfield should be on this list!! He’s so adorable http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yATtdheYPzg
    Also, Matthew Bellamy?

  11. David Bowie a.k.a. my future husband.

  12. My favorite part about this article is when you say “face like the Aggro Crag.” Also Paul McCartney. They’re kind of tied for my favorite part.

  13. Bono. There is something about Bono. ♥ And I agree with pretty much all of these!! There’s just something about them. And Beethoven’s ascot? I just died. :)

  14. I’m so happy to see that David made your #1! :) I have to wonder if I’m the only one that would add Iggy Pop to the list?! I’m also thinking Morrissey, Bono, Jared Leto and Adam Lambert.

  15. Elvis, Jim Morrison, Chris Cornell, Kevin Griffin from Better than Ezra, Mark Foster from Foster the People ( but the whole band is good looking), Mark McGrath from Sugar Ray, Joe Perry from Aerosmith. You did good with Beck and Bowie.

  16. Hugh Laurie & Elvis :D

  17. Great list, but I think you forgot Lou Reed! ;)

  18. Of course everyone will feel like someone is missing from the list…we all have different standards of what sexiness looks like. I am glad that this list has some unexpected names (Beethoven…it just cracked me up to see him listed!!) and although if I made my own top 20 list only about 3 or 4 of these guys would make it on there I can respect and understand how you would put each of these guys on the list, especially after seeing some of the photos you chose to represent them (ex. Mick Jagger from years ago).


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