Maybe my bed has some magical powers that I’m unaware of, but opening my eyes and getting out of bed is a painful experience for me. I love to sleep. My bed is so comfortable, and I cannot deal with having to get out of bed and live my life.
The worst part is that I trick myself into that I can get ready in a short amount of time time in the morning. According to my semi-conscious brain, I need 20 minutes to get ready in the morning. This 20 minutes includes: make-up, hair, breakfast, getting dressed and teeth brushing. In reality, I would say I need about 45 minutes, minimum. I refuse to accept my 45 minute reality because that means 25 additional minutes spent out of my bed.
I know that this sounds like I may be dealing with some form of depression. Trust me, I’ve considered this option, but the truth of the matter is that I am a lazy and self-indulgent person. I should be ashamed about this, but I’m not because ‘Baby, I was born this way, and God makes no mistakes’ (All credit goes to Lady Gaga for that sentence).
Here are my thoughts on what would happen if the world decided to sleep-in as much as possible.
1. Fewer car accidents. People who are sleepy crash into things. I’m not entirely sure how I survived college, considering I spent those 4 years in a state of constant sleep deprivation.
2. Absolutely nothing would get done on time. Why face your responsibilities when you can go back to Dream Land?
3. This could actually be potentially fatal. I know doctors have to get woken up in the middle of the night for emergencies. Can you imagine if they were like, “Ummm, no. I’m going to go back to sleep. The patient can wait until tomorrow. I’ll deal with his ruptured spleen then.” No bueno.
4. Rested people are happy. I would be happy. You would be happy. We would all be happy.
5. We would all be very happy and probably unemployed.
As much as I would like my day to start around 11am, I realize that this isn’t possible. It is unfortunate that life starts around 7-8am for most of us. Horrendous hours, if you ask me. The only solution that I can think to this is that I will make myself into a morning person. I’m too scared to take one of those 5 hour energy things (I don’t trust them, I don’t know why), so I’m going to find a way to turn myself into a morning person. By the end of the year, I’m going to embrace mornings like they were my long lost sister (unlikely).
P.S. I hope you liked the image I chose. I don’t know about you, but I do like to think of myself as Sleeping Beauty. Unfortunately, I look more like one of Maleficent’s minions in the morning than Princess Aurora. Keeping my fingers crossed for a handsome prince.
Image via KissMeTender