Girls can be mean especially to each other. We are especially critical on each other when it comes to looks and appearances. We can be catty by calling other girls “ugly” or “fat.”
I have always hated the word “fat” it is such an unkind, hateful word. It is a word meant to bring people down. I have never been one to be overly critical about other girls or comment about other girls’ weight. However, I’m human and have sadly said some unflattering things about other girls. Something I always regretted instantly.
Girls who are constantly critiquing other girls’ appearances have always rubbed me the wrong way. I never really knew why but it always left a bitter taste in my mouth and wanting to punch them in the face with a fork.
Then one day the reason hit me. I was at lunch with a good friend when a girl walked by in a dress that was just a little bit too tight.
“Ugh, she is way too fat for that dress,” my friend said.
This friend, who had an amazing body in my opinion, has always been overly body conscious. I realized in that moment when she was calling another female fat, it was just her insecurities coming out.
I think to some of the girls I know who made a habit of calling other girls fat and they were probably some of the most insecure girls I know. It’s simple psychology really. Someone who constantly feels the need to belittle others is the real one who is struggling with something inside.
Now every girl suffers from some sort of body image issues and I am no different. There was a time when I would purposely avoid mirrors so I didn’t have to look at myself. However, time heals all wounds and I have not only accepted my body but learned to loved it.
Once I learned to love myself and my body, I quickly stopped caring about others’ appearances. I no longer felt intimidated by others or cared what others thought. I also no longer felt the need to comment about other girls’ weight or looks.
When you call someone “fat” “chubby” or “ugly”, you are not really saying something about that person. You are revealing something about yourself. You are saying this person intimates me so I am going to insult them or I’m going to insult this person to make myself feel better briefly. So, congratulations, not only do you seem like a bitch but an insecure one at that.
Remember every after school special about bullies? You never could understand why that character behaved the way they did. Then, they got to the bully’s backstory and their parents were getting a divorce or something like that. They took out all their frustrations on someone who they perceived as weaker than them. In reality, it had nothing to do with the person being bullied and everything to do with the bully. It’s kind of like that.
Calling someone “fat” is taking all of these repressed bad feelings you have about yourself and throwing them onto an innocent victim. It’s you trying to deflect your own problems by pointing out somebody else’s.
If another girl’s appearance or weight bothers you that much then stop looking at them! Turn around. Problem solved.
Also, shouldn’t us females stick together? It’s bad enough when the media calls Kate Upton or Olympic athletes fat. Shouldn’t we try to bring each other up instead of tearing each other down. Where is our “Girl Power” spirit? The Spice Girls would be so disappointed in us.
At the end of the day, this type of behavior just isn’t nice. Who wants to be known as the mean girl?
My challenge to you ladies is the the next time you feel a mean word on the tip of your tongue, take a step back. Think to yourself why you really feel the need to cut someone down.
Anyway, aren’t we all beautiful in our own way?
(Image via Shutterstock).