That's Ba-Nanas

‘The Rachel Zoe Project' Episode 2: Launching Rachel's Line

Ironically, right before watching this week’s TRZP, I watched the series finale of Entourage in which Rachel Zoe helps Vince pick out an engagement ring (and manages not to use any of her usual catch phrases, I might add). Weird. Okay, moving on.

The episode starts out with a team meeting consisting of everyone but the team captain, Rachel. Rodge tells Mandana that she looks “very ‘Material Girl’ today”. She responds, “I don’t know what that means,” and the joke flies over Jeremiah’s gelled tresses as he tries to explain to her that she’s dressed like Madonna.

As Rodge continues discussing Rachel’s fall collection, showing it to Women’s Wear Daily, etc., I wonder just how much he misses his balls. I’m not trying to be mean, don’t get me wrong. I think it’s cool that Rodge saw an opportunity for them to make Rachel’s business successful and to have a marriage where they actually see one another. But he doesn’t really give a banana bunch about fashion, so all of this must be kind of hard for him to take seriously. It would be like Rachel running a hedge fund. Okay, not at all, but you get what I’m saying.

In any case, I’m glad he got Rachel to sleep in.

We learn that Jeremiah is tasked with pulling jewelry for the editors’ event. You might think he were going to be birthing Rachel’s baby the way the sweat is pouring down his face. Though I do have to hand it to him for texting pics of his picks to Mandana. Too many an assistant has tried to prove himself on reality TV by not asking for help and doing the task oh-so-wrong. This happens every time I get a new assistant. It’s insufferable.

Next, Rachel’s getting ready for Day One in NYC where she shows her line to WWD.

“Don’t kill my baby. Stop!” comes a girlish cry that turns out to be Rodge. His hair is everywhere. I think he could use some Elnett himself.

Everyone manages to pull themselves together and they cram into a car. Rodge takes this opportunity to give Rach a pep talk:

“At this point, if it doesn’t work out, I’m not sure what the next ten years look like.”

“Ahh, I keep styling?” Rachel says.

“Yeah, but you know, you’re gonna be with a couple kids in your fifties.”

Very supportive Rodge. Go team.

When the WWD writer comes over to talk to Rachel, I can tell how nervous she is. She’s clearly worked very hard on the line and I just want to carry her baby until the whole thing is over so she doesn’t migraine it to death. Really, I don’t, but I would at least hold her hand. The only thing calming me down is that (spoiler alert!) I know she gives birth to a healthy baby boy.

Jeremiah talks about how amazing it is to be there. He keeps saying it’s his first day. Isn’t this at least his third day by now? Maybe he got to skip math cause he was so cute.

That night, Rodge and Joey have a man date and Rodge tells Joey how loved he is. Joey divulges that he just got out of a relationship and looks like he needs a hug. Why won’t Rodge hug him? Why do I want to hug everyone in this episode?

Rodge tells Joey that if he came out to LA for the rest of Rach’s pregnancy, he’d let him drive his car. Joey’s back, lookin’ alive. Oh wait, he didn’t mean the Porche, just the Mercedes. It’s like being told you’re getting a new iPad2 and then you get version one. Gawd.

Next morning, Joey and Rachel have the WWD article in hand. “Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.”

They look at the pictures for forever. What does it say? I’m freaking out for Rachel and she won’t read it. Pictures, pictures, pictures. Okay, time to get ready!

Finally Rodge reads it. It’s good. Rodge says so.

Rachel and Joey have a moment while he’s doing her makeup and we see why she needs him in LA. Because not only is he her gay husband, but he always has a joke that makes her laugh when she’s upset.

“Joey? What if people don’t like my collection?”

“Your life is over.”

“Well, I still have my baby coming so that’s something to look forward to.”

Silver lining!

It’s chaos at the studio. Rach is exhausted. Her sis comes and gives her a hug. Thank you, Pam! A sister always knows.

Meanwhile, Jeremiah moved furniture around in the presentation room. He’s sweating and freaking out. He’s in charge of jewelry and furniture. I can see how he’s breaking under the pressure.

Rachel decides not to use any jewelry after all and Jeremiah looks like he’s gonna cry. He’s learning that he’s essentially useless and will probably get fired.

It’s time. Everyone’s there. The models come out in groups. I die. Legit, her clothes look amazing. Editors come up to rave.

“I’m always gonna be the girl that thinks nobody’s coming to her party and that nobody’s gonna like anything that I do,” Rachel says.

I heart Rachel right now. I have my own powerful inner tortured artist and second guessing the things that I create is my life. Maybe we could be sisters, Rach.

Rach has a moment in front of the crowd and she says her thank-yous to everyone who helped her make this dream a reality. Jeremiah is surprised that she forgets him. She didn’t forget you, Jeremiah. It’s your first day, so how exactly has your furniture arranging helped Rachel’s dream come true?

The next morning, Joey meets Jeremiah for breakfast. I wonder if Rodge knows he’s cheating. Uhhh, they are wearing the same exact outfit. This always happens to me on dates, too, you guys!

Joey essentially tells Jeremiah that Rachel’s going to forget who he is. Nobody’s being possessive here. But actually, it seems like this already happened. Get on your game, Jeremiah.  Those looks ain’t gonna last forever.

I have to point out here that it’s getting to where I know what Rachel’s gonna say before she says it. Just saying. It’s major.

Good news. Bergdorff buys almost the WHOLE line. Is this old news? I only go to Bergdorff’s once a year to look in the windows.

After a long few days, Rachel kicks back with Pam. “There is a child slash alien slash vampire growing in my stomach,” she announces. This is most likely true.

Pam and Joey register for baby clothes for Rach at Bonpoint. “Every baby needs a Jesus sandal,” Joey informs us. Even if they cost $105. Which they do.

I can’t wait to see next week when Joey’s in LA. Will he sleep in Rachel’s bed and drive Rodge’s car?

Top image via RealityTea.

All other images via BravoTv.

Need more Giggles?
Like us on Facebook!

Want more Giggles?
Sign up for our newsletter!