The Pregnant Lady's Perspective

The One in Which Maybe We Leave Jessica Simpson the Hell Alone

So, I went for a doctor’s visit the other day because I’ve been having trouble with kidney stones (oh my God, have you ever) and after walking through the door and checking in, I realized, with a sinking feeling, that I’d have to hop on the scale, since it was my first visit to my primary care physician since I had my baby – almost three months ago. I didn’t need to get on that scale. I know how much I weigh. I don’t bug about it, because it’s my business and I’m not going to rattle my own cage over something that’s going to work itself out anyhow, so I did it to placate the nurse, and for the sake of “tracking healthy weight” within my medical record. You get it.

With a sigh, I heaved myself up on the unforgiving digital (!) devil and shot an apologetic glance out of the corner of my eye as the impassive nurse penciled in a number that made me roll my eyes. She didn’t even say anything, but then, she didn’t have to, because I said it all: “You know I don’t normally weigh this much but I gave birth just ten-and-a-half short weeks ago and I had a c-section, so duh, like, obviously sit-ups were out for awhile and you know things have been busy -” and I stopped. I stopped and I shut the hell up. Because really, why did I owe this lady (whom I didn’t even know) an explanation about the three meaningless numbers that popped up on the office scale? Why did I owe any explanation to anyone about the weight I’d gained during my (very well-fed) pregnancy? It was nobody’s business but my own, and the fact that I’d caved to the pressure of “Oh my God, she must think I’m a lazy heifer” really disappointed me and I came to a realization: we’re all being conditioned to be the same Gisele Bundchen-type when, in reality, not all of us are.

Later, I got to thinking about how poor Jessica Simpson must feel, having to uncomfortably laugh off her pregnancy weight gain in every single interview and in every single photo shoot she’s done since announcing her fetus-carrying earlier in the year. And you know what I thought? I thought, IT’S NOT FAIR. What the hell do I (or Jessica Simpson) owe to anyone? I mean, were you there rubbing the knots out of my back when cramps practically destroyed my muscles? Did you turn on the nightlights when I had to pee (sixteen times) every night? Were you holding my hand when I was told that I needed that emergency c-section? No, you weren’t. So why you feel you have any right to discuss how many damn pounds I put on while I was carrying either one of my children is beyond all comprehension, and I’ll bet that Jessica probably feels the same – she’s just too polite to say so.

Jessica Simpson is probably the most real, most down-to-earth celebrity going, and in the day and age of celebrities gaining twelve pounds during their pregnancy (7-8 allotted for the baby and 4-5 specially reserved for placenta, water weight, breast swelling and pure pigging out you little swine, you), it was a travesty that – heaven forbid! – Jessica Simpson experienced what your average woman experiences at least once during their 2.4 lifetime pregnancies: a bit of weight gain that has nothing to do with baby and all to do with an unverified excuse to eat what you want. Honestly, do you know how many things come up when you Google “Jessica Simpson pregnancy weight gain”? A TON. And most of the headlines sound like this:

Pregnant Jessica Simpson’s Weight Gain Bashed

Jessica Simpson Gains Excessive Weight During Pregnancy

Has Jessica Packed On Too Many Pregnancy Pounds?

Jessica Simpson’s Excessive Weight Gain Has Doctors Worried

Oh, okay, I see – women are supposed to feel like failures if they go above and beyond the 25-35 pound recommended weight gain during pregnancy, is that right? Come on.

You know what I’m sick of? The thinly-veiled condescension for pregnant “fatties” disguised behind a false layer of “concern” for the mother’s well-being, her risk for gestational diabetes, whether or not the children will have ADD in ten years because mom packed on the pounds while she was carrying him and how pregnancy obesity is driving your health insurance rates. You know what? Get over yourselves and mind your damn business. I’d like to see how some of these non-famous, non-personal-chef-having, non-eighty-grand-costing-home-gym-owning childless average women (and men! MEN!) react when they see what can happen to your body during a time of complete upheaval should they have to go through it themselves.

Maybe – just maybe – their tunes will be a bit little different then, hey?

  • Victoria Thomas

    well said – absolutely beautifully put…..xo

    • Lori Wojciechowski

      Hell, yes.

  • Chelsea Jonkman

    So true!

  • Thu Ngo

    Nothing any celebrity does is any of my damn business, and I really don’t have the energy or time to care, you know?

  • Jamie Brown

    I’ve never been pregnant. However, isn’t it true that a lot of the time, the bigger you get during the pregnancy the healthier the baby is speculated to be? If she looked like a size zero with a small cantaloupe stuffed in her shirt, that would not look like she was taking care of herself, from my perspective. People should just be happy that she and the baby are healthy.

  • Tiffany McCormick


  • Laryssa Marie Grguric

    Well no, if you gain too much weight you can run into problems with pre-eclampsia, gestational diabetes .. total weight gain during pregnancy should only be about 25 lbs and calorie increases should only be around 400 calories.

    • Robert Remillard

      My wife is an OB/GYN. She gives her patients sound advice about diet, weight gain and how this could affect two lives. This advice is mostly ignored and many of her patients end up with complications that increase risk and run the total bill up significantly. We have one child. My wife gained 13 pounds total and was in a bikini within 6 weeks.

  • Shahzad Saleem

    hello,,,,your so beautiful lady.

  • Âbđëł Kàřîḿ Dőùŋġä

    tu es trop belle et sexy

  • Saa Naa

    to post a comment

  • Karen Valenzuela

    Thank you for this! :)

  • Nicole Landini

    And seriously, any woman who can look that fabulous, prego, in heels, gets an A+ in my book.

  • Samantha Wardle

    great post! I totally agree! And yes, girls got 6 inch heels on, good for her!

  • Candice MacNeale Lazecky

    As a mother of two I completely agree with you. It’s not anyone’s business. On the flip side, if you make your living selling your personal life to the masses, you have to be prepared for a little intrusion. It’s unfortunate that people put themselves in these situations, and that there are so many of us ready to jump on the bandwagon.

  • Franchesca Cox

    Thank you!!!!!

  • Harvey Hausmann

    I love it!! Jessica Simpson is a beautiful woman who probably doesn’t have a mean bone in her body! I’m tired of people making fun of her intelligence and pregnancy weight gain. She seems to be such a genuine person. I have no idea how she can take all this crap and not kill someone!!!! I love Jessica Simpson for her incredible patience and poise in the face of all this unwarranted criticism!!

  • Amy Atkins Contreras

    And of course, people always defend it with “Well she’s famous, she offered herself up to it!”. Yes and No, people 😛 And LOOK at her. My mother had seven kids and that image evokes her for me. She let her body do what it would, ate healthy yet often, and was NEVER seen in public without a proud shade of lipstick.

  • Julie Carter

    Awesome rant. And I feel for you, because of the kidney stones. I’ve had multiple ones that are too big to pass, so I’ve had several operations. Some of the worst times I’ve ever had! Good luck!

  • Rachel Cassondra

    I absolutely love this! I just had my third child & gained 50 lbs with the first two, & 60 with this last one. I had gestational diabetes all three times. And you know what? ALL of my babies are healthy, wonderful & adorable. Your diet alone does not determine if you will develop problems. I ate healthy every pregnancy, especially this last one. I craved fresh fruits & raw veggies-couldn’t get enough!! What mattered most to me was the health of my babies, & I breastfed all of them (still am the new one too) & that does not shed the pounds off every lady, let me tell you! So thank you for this uplifting post, it makes a fellow mom proud to be carrying those extra pounds like half the other moms in our society. :)

  • Kristen Holan

    While I don’t think that pregnancy is an excuse to overeat (you only need maybe 200 extra calories starting at the END of the second trimester), I don’t think it’s anyone else’s business or right to talk about a person’s weight gain behind their back – especially as a result from pregnancy. Looks like Simpson will be the one laughing, though. Weight Watchers offered her $5 mil. to lose the baby weight. Sounds like a motivator to me! :)

  • Devonna Harvey

    i dont see how anyone can overeat during pregnancy i sure cant i get full on 3 bites but still gained 50 something pounds but fail 2 realize how complications can arise out of nowhere most of the weight i gained was fluidunder my skin barely touch me and i would have a bent lol Sweet or not Jessica has the right to say “Hey Shut Up And Mind Your Business”

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