Writing In Bed The Mind's Debate On Complaints: School and Other Life Choices Marianna Tabares

In all the years leading up to the end of high school, you generally don’t have much of a choice but to be a student. You will absolutely complain because hey, sometimes school is a drag and the days go on as if they are pulling you by the ankles just to get you to each class.

Eventually, the time comes to get outta there and you are presented with a few choices like attending community college, a university, or going straight into a job or a cool trade school, to name a few.

Whatever you choose, you will be required to commit to your goals and put forth a great amount of energy. It’s for your own good!

As I’ve skimmed through blogs and social networks over the years, I’ve heard this point come up several times, rephrased one way or another, and it makes great sense to me: There’s no point in complaining about circumstances in life that YOU chose for yourself.

For example, when you catch yourself about to complain about midterms or finals, that’s the precise moment in which you have to swing your attitude the other way and regain perspective. Unless you did it because you were pressured by your parents, you likely chose on your own to go to college and you enrolled yourself into the necessary courses for reaching your goals. You have to remember that these challenges are all part of the program. They are presented to you so that you may have benchmarks for growth.

Because this is costing you money and because you owe it to yourself, you should do your best to miss as few of your classes as possible. Preferably none. Never take on the kind of attitude that you will hear from sloppy people who will say things like, “Well I’m paying for it so I’ll miss class if I want to.” Just because you’re paying for it does not mean your instructor or professor deserves to read any potentially misinformed essays. I can tell you whole-heartedly that when I was a teacher, the hardest thing for me to do was grade essays written from students who put in the least effort and had the worst attendance.  It felt like a huge waste of my time to expend any effort on papers written by the students who showed the least interest in arriving to class on time or showing up at all.

It’s okay to complain, don’t get me wrong, but it’s not okay if it pulls you away from succeeding in your endeavors. It goes without saying (yet I’m saying it anyway) that we are experiencing some very challenging times. Tuition rates get higher every year and so do our levels of anger and frustration. Finding a job we will enjoy is also a challenge, but not impossible.

We’re at the mercy of our own perspectives. I caught myself at that very moment where the critical decision to have either a good or bad day was upon me and I chose neither. I wanted to show up to work with an empty head, meaning that I wanted to find myself in the absence of complaints, unhappiness, and any other discouraging weights. Sometimes you have to do that for yourself. You have to shake your head around like an Etch-a-Sketch and make room for clearer thoughts and encouragements.

Since we’re all going to complain anyway, what with being human and all, I propose we also force ourselves to outnumber each complaint with two better ideas. It would sound something like this:

Ugh, I don’t want to write this paper. No wait, I owe this to myself. I owe it to my teacher to put in some effort.

I’m too tired to go to work. I’ll feel better after some coffee. I’ll make a to-do list and the day will go by faster when I get a lot of things done.

These aren’t over the top encouragements. They’re realistic and doable.

Upset Woman Complains via ShutterShock

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  1. Great article! I love it! It should speak to us all :-)

  2. thanks for this! I’m coming to the end of my master’s and sometimes I lament about all the work I still have to do. But you are right – I chose this. So I might as well stick it through properly and do a damn good job of it!

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