This week, I found out that Alexis Bledel, a.k.a. Rory Gilmore, is dating Vincent Kartheiser, a.k.a. Pete Campbell from Mad Men… IN REAL LIFE! Being the rabid Gilmore Girls fan that I am, I’m always excited to hear even the smallest piece of news about Alexis Bledel, but this is way more than a juicy tidbit. It’s a full on glass of fresh-squeezed Alexis juice! But of course, to me there is very little distinction between the actress, Alexis Bledel, and the character, Rory Gilmore, so it’s only natural that I think back on the men Rory has already dated and dismissed. There’s been much debate among my friends (and enemies) as to which guy was best for Rory, so I thought I’d provide a little breakdown for anyone who needs a refresher.
Dean Forester
Played by Jared Padalecki, Dean was Rory’s first official boyfriend. She met him on her last day attending Stars Hollow High and proceeded to date him on and off for several years, including a lascivious affair while he was married to another Stars Hollow classmate, Lindsay.
Important fact: Rory lost her virginity to Dean (ahem, while he was still married).
Pros: Dean is the ultimate good boyfriend. He worships the ground Rory walks on, makes nice with her family, demonstrates incredible patience (and, hey, Rory can be pretty annoying with all the book browsing and grade-related panic attacks), and is easy on the eyes. Despite the fact that he cheated on Lindsay, I firmly believe he would have stayed loyal to Rory for the entirety of their relationship, should she have chosen to be with him.
Cons: I hate Dean. I think he is way too dumb for Rory. I know a lot of people, including some of my closest friends, will disagree with me, but I actually think it is the fault of the writers. When we first meet Dean, he’s the new boy in town. He hails from Chicago, picks up on obscure movie references, and banters easily with Rory. But by season 2, he’s transformed into a bumbling farm boy fool (and NOT in the hot way) who can’t provide even the slightest intelligent opinion on Rory’s writing, doesn’t want to see the same movies, and thinks it’s a good idea to get married right out of high school. Also, he cheats, and he treats Lindsay terribly (remember when she accidentally answers his cell phone and he reams her out?). Finally, I think there is palpable sexual tension between Dean and Lorelai, especially in the era when he is constructing the inn. And that just freaks me out.
Jess Mariano
The demise of Rory’s relationship with Dean, Jess is Luke’s nephew, who appears on the scene and promptly steals Rory’s attention and eventually her heart. Jess is the consummate bad boy – he’s everything Dean wasn’t. Whip-smart, rebellious, well-read, exciting… he definitely doesn’t treat Rory well but he’s her match intellectually. Their relationship spins out when he leaves town without even saying goodbye.
Important fact: Jess is the catalyst for Rory’s return to Yale in season 6, long after their romantic relationship has ended. It’s his criticism of her life at her grandparents’ that forces her to reevaluate.
Pros: Jess is incredibly smart and keeps up with Rory in a way Dean never could. He loves to read and talk about books, he’s a writer, he understands all of her references (although I think it’s highly unrealistic that it takes him even a second to realize who “Dodger” is when she refers to him that way), and he and Rory have a deep emotional and physical attraction. He keeps her on her toes and he is quite attractive. Bonus: the actor, Milo Ventimiglia, and Alexis Bledel dated in real life.
Cons: Jess sucks. He’s a total dick to Rory, never calling when he says he will, leaving her hanging, and excluding her from the important details in his life. He’s rude to her grandmother and dishonest about most of his problems. When Rory finally gets over him, he comes crawling back to muck up her life, trying to get her back. Jess is bad news, and no matter how cute or smart he is, he would never have made a good long-term boyfriend for Rory.
Logan Huntzberger
Rory’s longest steady boyfriend on the show, she dates Logan for most of college and post-college. He’s from an even wealthier background than she is, making him the first of her boyfriends to meet the approval of her rich and snobby grandparents. Logan is an interesting mix of Dean and Jess in that he is as smart as Rory (and she claims he is even smarter), quick with the witty banter, a pretty good boyfriend (eventually), but with a definite edge. For awhile, Logan gives her almost as much trouble as Jess did, first not wanting to be exclusive and later “cheating” on her when they were on a break. He’s probably the most nuanced of the three love interests, but we also have more time to get to know him and his family than we do with the other two.
Important fact: Logan proposes to Rory in the final season of the series and she turns him down.
Pros: Logan is ostensibly the best “match” for Rory. They come from similar enough families (although Shira Huntzberger would claim there’s a huge class gap between them), both attend Yale, seem to want the same kind of lifestyle (Rory-The-Later-Years is quite a little society woman), and never run out of things to talk about. Rory is deeply attracted to him and excited by him, and this never wanes throughout their relationship. Above all, he’s a reformed troublemaker with intense ambition and deep admiration for Rory.
Cons: In many ways, Logan is a rich asshole who never really grew up. He’s condescending to Marty when we first meet him (and yes, he defends himself intelligently, but still), hangs out with other spoiled dilettantes, resists commitment to Rory, buys her a friggin’ Birkin bag (I’m sure some of you will put that in the pro column but COME ON! Does he know her at all?!), and just generally annoys me. Years into dating Rory, he refers to Luke as “Duke”. Luke, the man who is a surrogate father to Rory. Does Logan seriously not know his name by then?! He’s smarmy, cocky, and loses millions of his father’s dollars in a business deal gone wrong. Also, he refuses to keep seeing Rory if she won’t marry him at age twenty-two. Lame.
Over the years, other men appeared who might have been good for Rory. Marty, perhaps, or that T.A. subbing in for her grandfather after his heart attack. But Rory doesn’t really date – and as we see when she goes out with a boy from class, she is incredibly awkward and stilted when she tries. Frankly, I’m not satisfied with any of the options we’re given for Rory’s potential lifelong love interest. I’m in the middle of my 16th viewing of the entire series, and while Logan has grown on me and I can see where he might make a good husband, I still agree with Rory’s decision to turn him down. Who knows, maybe if the show had continued she would have had a career-and-life-and-world-politics-altering affair with Barack Obama, her boss at the end of the series. Until they finally make the Gilmore Girls reunion movie, a girl can only dream.
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I quite liked the new mature Jess who convinced her to go back to school. He had a good head on his shoulders, and I very much wanted them to get back together.
Honestly, even though I am 100% a Jess fan I think by the end of the series Jess was kind of too good for Rory. He had his life totally together as an author and publisher and really seemed to have matured while keeping his cool, while Rory was still unsure and indecisive on top of being WAY over-obsessed with image. But hey, Jess can call me anytime
i totaly agree with the most logan fans out there. i liked him a lot! he was the perfect mix but the end was written poorly… but im still team LOGAN <3
I think the scriptwriters lost their wit at the final season. Logan was more than perfect, he actually became mature enough to be involved with long-term relaitonship and eventually propose. However, Rory simply declined the proposal, and Logan simply did not want to have anything more with her. It is quite unrealistic (not that I expect tv shows to be realistic,but still…) that a man who grows so fond to a woman would leave her only by the mere postpone of engagement. Both of the characters were not really well written at the end.
PS – BEST LINE of the WHOLE SERIES (and why I love Logan the most): Mere moments before Rory and Logan close the deal, he says: “if you think climbing in that window was hard…”
BRILLZ!!
This post is the BEST birthday present I could have asked for (6/27 is my DOB). I didn’t think there was a bigger Gilmore Girls freak out there than myself. I’m happy to know I have company! One time I went house porning in LA and randomly stumbled across the open house for AMY SHERMAN PALLADINO’s Hancock Park mansion. It was decorated a la 1920′a style TO A TEE and looked like a museum. So how did I figure out it was her house? A Gilmore Girls throw on a chair. A totally out of place Luke’s Diner sign. Oh, and MAIL with her name on it!! It was selling for 6 million bucks! Gotta love syndication…
Okay, here we go. Dean) was very overbearing and protective of Rory (and not in a cute way). His pressuring her to say “I love you” when she didn’t want to at first is akin to pressuring a girl to have sex with you. Especially for someone as inexperienced and shy as Rory was, that is an important moment and it shouldn’t be forced or used as a guilt tactic. At the same time, though, he had no spine. He would have done anything to keep her – including stalking her and going to her mother to talk about their problems INSTEAD OF talking about them with Rory. When I was younger, I liked Dean. Now, I just find him sappy and annoying and – yes, you hit the nail on the head – too dumb because of the stupid writers. Jess) If he and Rory had gotten together after high school, when he was grown up, it would have been perfect. But yes, you basically covered everything. He was afraid of the vulnerability of really being in a relationship with someone. Logan) First of all, it’s Jason who calls Luke “Duke” if I recall (maybe Logan did once or twice or something, but it’s Jason who obstinately keeps calling him “Duke” and I honestly can’t remember Logan saying it). I feel like Logan was an attempt to see how Rory would have done had she actually dated Tristan. Both are rich, snotty boys from good families, both interested in getting into meaningless trouble, both even have spiky blonde hair and gravelly voices! I really think Logan was just a revisitation of Tristan. That said, I think he and Rory were well matched. I didn’t like that he lied to her or that he disrespected Emily and Richard with his LDB stunt at dinner – I felt like he had matured at that point and that was a throwback to old Logan. I also don’t really like that Rory changed when she was with him. She was no longer a booky small-town girl, but a high end rich kid. I’m not just talking about staying at the Gilmores, but her interests, her friends, and her personality completely changed. I know people change throughout college as I’m in college and going through some changes and growth of my own, but I feel like it wasn’t right for her, and neither did Lorelai.
Okay, I thnk that’s everything. Longtime fan, here, so some of this has been plaguing me for years. Great article, love those Gilmore Girls!
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Actually Logan calls him Duke too – in “A Vineyard Valentine”. Check it out if you are doubtful. Thanks for the thoughtful analysis, though! Love your passion
None of them! I’m glad Rory ended up with whom she deserved to be. Alone. That girl has gone from relationship to relationship. It was about time she ditched the men and started living her life.
Logan. I liked grown up Jess but he was still not quite right. Whilst Logan was a total brat at the beginning of his run on the show I liked to think he matured the same way Jess had. Though, in the fantasy world where GG never ended maybe Rory met someone uber fantastic.
For me, it will always be Jess. When he came back as a writer with his life together, I wanted Rory to dump Logan’s butt so hard. Jess and Rory had a volatile relationship, but it worked.
Jess! grown-up jess who works at the publishers, not young rebellious jess. everyone loves a reformed bad-boy
I think her and Marty would have hit it off, but their super totally embarrassingly awkward sleeping-naked-in-the-hallway thing might have made it totally weird. I loved the way dean treated her, but it was totally messed up when they got back together after dean was married-not cool! I don’t actually think that kind of thing would be in rory’s character, she seems the quiet bookish type that knows when things are over.
I didn’t like Jess at all until I watched the series the second time. He mostly seemed like a jerk and he intentionally caused all the tension between Rory and Dean that lead them to break up. Also, asking her to run away with him would have been worse for her than what she did when he criticized her for running away from Yale and living in her grandparents’ pool house.
Logan did become sweet, but he was way too pigheaded to see that Rory was totally worth the wait and that her career was important too. She was finally getting what she always dreamed and he put a huge fork in the road for her. Lame move, dude.
“I know a lot of people, including some of my closest friends, will disagree with me, but I actually think it is the fault of the writers. When we first meet Dean, he’s the new boy in town. He hails from Chicago, picks up on obscure movie references, and banters easily with Rory. But by season 2, he’s transformed into a bumbling farm boy fool” – YES. THIS. I have been saying this for years! I loved Dean when he was first introduced but by season 3 they had written him as a complete idiot so as to make Rory’s connection to Jess more plausible. And it frustrated me all the more because I hated Jess! I know I’m in the minority here, but Jess was awful. I never saw the appeal until he returned in season 6 all grown up and with his life together. Before that though? Total asshole. He treated Rory horribly and was disrespectful to pretty much everyone who meant anything to her. How is that attractive?!
I have had many the heated debate on this topic with girlfriends over the years and now you’ve got me all riled up again haha. I agree with your assessment though, none of those boys were the right fit for Rory.
First, I’m team Jess, but I’m not blind to his faults. He did grow up and if they were given a chance to connect as adults, I think they would make a great couple. Also, in Logan’s defense, he never referred to Luke as “Duke.” That was Jason, Lorelai’s season 4 boyfriend.
Not to be whatever, but Logan did it too, in “A Vineyard Valentine.” He says, “Tell your mom to invite that guy she’s seeing, what’s his name, Duke?”. Thankyouverymuch.
I’m absolutely Team Jess and always have been. Yes, he had to get his life together and stop being a jerk, but once he grew up, I think he was the perfect match.
JESS FOREVER.
I AM IN COMPLETE AGREEMENT WITH YOU.
Milo Ventimiglia could do what ever he wanted to me and I wouldn’t complain…
a gilmore girls reunion movie – best idea ever.
I really liked Jess in season 6, but I gotta admit that I was totally Team Logan! It didn’t matter that Jess was probably a better fit, Matt Czuchry just had this grin that made me weak in the knees!
JESS. Despite all the intelligent and thought-out cons you can find I will never waver in my ridiculous championing of Jess. Also, I think when she visited him later in the show, at the book publisher’s or wherever it was, he’d really matured. He wasn’t the same guy who never answered her calls or left town without a goodbye, he’d grown up. Maybe he wasn’t right for her then/in the early seasons, but he would be now. So basically what I’m saying is, if they ever make the Gilmore Girls movie and she’s not with Jess, I’ll probably t.p. Amy Sherman-Pallidino’s house or something.