Our ‘Best of 2012′ lists wouldn’t be any fun without bringing you the crazy and shocking moments reality television gave us this year. No matter what your reality taste is, this list runs the gamut from scandalous to just plain silly.
12. Mob Wives: Junior’s Betrayal
Renee Graziano has proven herself to be quite the drama queen, but the craziness that surrounded her on the second season of Mob Wives was nothing short of unbelievable. She had been recently reconciling with her ex-husband Junior and their mob romance seemed to finally be back on track. But Renee’s life began to implode when Junior and her father got arrested on the same day. What made for such a coincidence? Renee discovered Junior was a rat and had been cooperating with the feds for months. Her family was in turmoil and she faces the reality that her renewed romance with Junior was all part of the game. Someone send this woman to India to Eat, Pray, Love – quick!
11. Celebrity Apprentice: Arsenio Hall vs. Aubrey O’Day
Every year of Celebrity Apprentice seems to bring a bizarre celebrity beef and this past season was no different. In one corner, was Aubrey O’Day who enjoyed dominating every task and boardroom. She was typically the brains behind most team tasks and wasn’t afraid to let everyone know it. In the other corner, Arsenio Hall, who grew very tired of Aubrey’s “stank ass.” And when she took more than her share of credit for a Walgreens task, Arsenio lost his shizz and called her a whore, and she she stormed off the show. This is one of those cases where both parties were wrong, but the result was oh so good reality television.
10. Real Housewives of New York: Luann Gets Caught with a Pirate
We all know Countess Luann de Lesseps for her self-appointed title as a modern day manners queen. Not sure where bringing home another man when you’re in a committed relationship falls on the etiquette scale, but Luann seems to be above her own rules. After a wild night in St. Barts, she brings home a Johnny Depp look-a-like who is dressed as a pirate. Her intentions and possibly actions were apparently less than innocent as she spends the next day trying to explain away his presence. Luann thinks her castmates are foolish enough to believe she brought home a ‘group of Italian friends’ instead of the lone pirate. She even tries to speak off-camera in French, pleading with her friend to tell Captain Jack to keep his mouth shut. Fellow housewife Carole cleverly comments that “it’s never the crime, always the cover up!”
9. Flipping Out: Andrew is a Pathological Liar
This season of Flipping Out introduced us to a brand new design associate, Andrew. He is a gay delight with a great attitude and apparently pretty good at his job. He may be the source of constant off-color jokes, but we wouldn’t expect anything less from Jeff Lewis’ office. Andrew is your typical trust-fund kid who has to hold a job in order keep his trust money. But then we learn there is no trust fund. No multiple homes. No anything. Andrew is a liar and virtually everything he has told Jeff and his staff have been figments of his imagination. When confronted, Andrew naturally flees. But when he comes back groveling with apologies, Jeff gives him his job back. Because everyone deserves a second-chance. Even fake trust fund babies.
8. Teen Mom 2: Jenelle chooses Ke$ha over freedom
Jenelle Evans is fast becoming the Lindsay Lohan of reality TV. With numerous arrests already under her belt, she can’t seem to stay out of trouble or off her weed pipe for too long. She decides to take a stint in jail over probation because she doesn’t have faith in her ability to stay off drugs. There’s only one hitch: the dates she’s expected to serve falls during the same time she has tickets to a Ke$ha concert! This is completely unacceptable to Jenelle and she pleads with her lawyer as she’s already put feathers in her hair, Ke$ha style! Watching her lawyer reason with her is priceless. But not as priceless as seeing someone cry over a Ke$ha concert.
7. Couples Therapy: Dourtney
VH1’s Couples Therapy attempts to help ‘celebrity’ couples overcome their differences. Married couple 52 year-old Doug Hutchison and teen bride Courtney Stodden have a 34 year age difference that tends to get in the way of their sacred bond. One way the age difference interferes? As a minor, Stodden can’t stay in the therapy house overnight due to child labor laws! Hutchison misses her terribly and begins to draw a mural of love to Courtney over the walls of their room. He also writes ‘Dourtney,’ something his housemates ridicule him mercilessly for. It’s really hard to side with this middle-aged groom when he’s writing love notes to a teenage girl, even if it’s his wife.
6. Catfish: The TV Show: Jasmine & Mike
Catfish is my newest guilty pleasure and absolutely earns a spot on our list. The show brings the documentary of the same name to life. Former Internet romance victim Nev Shulman helps others involved in online relationships find out if their romances are real or fake. Nothing ever appears to be as it seems and this was especially the case for Jasmine. She had been texting with Mike for 2 years without ever meeting, but she was sure he was the one. Nev finds out the real Mike turns out to be a girl named Mhissy who was simply taking revenge on Jasmine for having dated her man a few years back. When the two girls meet and Jasmine discovers the truth, a horror of Keyser Soze proportions unveils.
5. Don’t Be Tardy for the Wedding: Kim Kicks Out Her Mom from Wedding
Don’t Be Tardy for the Wedding chronicled the ridiculously over the top nuptials of Kim Zolciak and Kroy Biermann. Colin Cowie helped plan the blingtastic event that featured $50,000 worth of flowers and three boob-alicious gowns worn by the bride. The wedding took place in the couple’s backyard and they even had state of the art port-a-potties for their guests. But alas, a crime was committed on this night of wedded bliss. The crime? A wedding guest dared to use a bathroom inside the house! The culprit? The bride’s own mother! This was against the rules and Kim’s mom’s careless actions caused their newborn to WAKE UP. Kim and Kroy were naturally enraged and did the only sensible thing: have security throw her mother out of the party.
4. Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta: Stevie J Therapy Fight
Just your classic story of boy gets girl and then gets another girl pregnant. Oh, and then they all go to therapy together! Of course I’m talking about the the preposterous counseling method suggested by musician/womanizer Stevie J. He convinced his baby momma and longtime girlfriend Mimi, that their couples therapy would go better if they brought the mistress he impregnated, Joseline into their sessions. Both women shockingly agreed, but Joseline was under the impression Stevie J was trying to reconcile with her. When Mimi revealed she was still living with Stevie J, Joseline unleashed the kind of beat-down any scorned woman could appreciate. And thus was the end of ménage á therapy.
3. Real Housewives of New Jersey: Strippergate
Any RHONJ fan knows Theresa has been gunning for her sister-in-law Melissa since day one even though both sides of the family have attempted to reconcile. But all hopes of family peace were squashed near the end of last season when Theresa plotted one of the sneakiest back-stabbing moves reality TV has ever seen. Her friend Kim helped her participate in a set- up where Melissa’s former ‘boss’ tells Theresa on-camera that she used to be a stripper for him. Theresa acts defensive as if she is coming to Melissa’s aid, when in fact all she does is help to facilitate the rumor. It all backfires on Theresa when everyone is suspicious of her and on the reunion Kim even admits Theresa was in on it. Pretty sure the Giudice’s and the Gorga’s won’t be sharing any homemade Italian dinners this holiday season.
2. Here Comes Honey Boo Boo: Everybody’s a Little Bit Gay
If Shirley Temple was born in a trash can full of Red Bull and Cheesy Poofs, she would have been Honey Boo Boo. Seven year-old Alana Thompson wears her moniker with pride and has created a few memorable catchphrases and routines. But where does Honey Boo Boo stand on gay tolerance? In one episode, her gay Uncle Poodle (real name?) comes to visit where Alana welcomes him with open arms. Honey Boo Boo proves to be a young girl full of only love and acceptance. She carefully explains, “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with bein’ a little gay. Everybody’s a little gay.” I can’t wait to call my Dad this holiday season and inform him he’s a little gay.
1. It’s a Brad Brad World: Les Mis Flash Mob
Everything in Brad Goreski’s life looks fabulous, but perhaps the most fabulous thing in his life is his hilarious comedy writer boyfriend, Gary Janetti. They make the most un-nauseatingly adorable couple and they wanted to share their love (a.k.a throw an awesome party) for their 10th anniversary. Gary seemed to get progressively more irritated and cranky with the party planning process, but maybe this was just because he was fretting over the amazeballs surprise he was planning. In the middle of the swanky féte, Gary gives a speech when suddenly, a guest begins to sing “One Day More” from Les Miserables. And then another guest sings. A full flash mob comprised of their show biz friends and family ensues and it is nothing short of amazing. Early on, Brad and Gary bonded over their love of Les Miserables, and I can’t think of a better gift Gary could have given him. Except, you know, more clothes.
There you have it! This year was filled with more drama than hopefully any of us regular girls ever have to experience. I have to say if this was any indication, I’m a little frightened of what 2013 may have in store for us…