Some Medical Memories: It’s Been Quite A Ride
by Alexandra
This week I got the excellent news that I passed my oral boards for anesthesiology! Yes, now I will finally quit whining about studying and being nervous… And eventually I will stop telling everyone that I passed, as well. Not only that, but I will never really talk about exams ever again because I am finally done. Really done. I’m done with all medical training and exams and now I am entering the nebulous era that will be my career in medicine. I can’t believe this period of my life has finally arrived. It has made me rather nostalgic, and I’ve been reflecting on my 9 years in medical school and residency training. So today I have some memories to share. This is just a smattering of memories, there is so much more… More that probably isn’t appropriate to tell. It’s going to be quasi stream of consciousness, so bear with me…
1. Medical school hyperchondria.
There is a well known phase wherein medical students, blasted with new knowledge of the human body and the infinite number of pathological processes, begin to fear and diagnose any and every process in their selves (and innocent people on the street). I remember coming home to find my roommate sobbing, convinced she had lymphoma.
2. Anatomy class.
AKA “Are you cool with cutting people?” class. This was a trip, and the one class that is done some justice by movies and television. We were in groups, 4 or 5 people per body, and we would come in every day and do dissections according to our course book. There were also tanks of isolated parts (i.e. a tank of heads). People ran out crying on the day we did face dissection. I had a headlamp and real surgical tools that my Dad had given me from his office, just a slight hint that he was excited for me to become a surgeon. Yes, my tank mates made me do everything. Yes, I have sawed a body in half. Please still like me. One thing that isn’t always shown on TV and movies: Everyone was extremely respectful and reverent. No, we did not name anyone. There was a service for the families of the donors. Doing cadaver dissection actually felt like one of the biggest honors I have ever had and one of the hugest gifts I have ever received.
3. The Autopsy
In medical school, we had to “take call” to see an autopsy. When the morgue got a body, your group would be called when it was your turn. Your group then had to go down to the hospital morgue and watch a full autopsy. My group got called on Halloween and I’m not even kidding when I tell you that the assistant in the morgue who showed us the body and gave us an orientation WAS IN COSTUME. AS A SLUTTY COWGIRL.
4. My First Incision
I had tunnel vision for becoming a surgeon from day one. My first day on my surgical rotation, I was with this awesome endocrine surgeon who let me make the incision. I have never wanted to be better at anything in my life. It was so cool. As I put the knife to skin, The White Stripes ‘Seven Nation Army’ was playing. I felt awesome.
5. Living with My Bestie Awesome Roommate
My fondest memories of living with her during medical school were our nights drinking cheap champagne, ordering Thai food, watching movies, and knitting. The best of these nights? Watching The Notebook and sobbing our faces off, trying to convince each other that the old woman just had temporary memory loss from dehydration or a urinary tract infection.
6. Driving to San Francisco with My Dad
Crossing the Bay Bridge after the drive from Wisconsin into my new city? Amazing. I had never lived further than 3 miles from my parents.
7. My First Weeks as an Intern
I can hardly remember, I was so traumatized. It was so hard. I had nightmares all the time about patients. I remember getting calls about patients spiking temperatures and just freaking out about what to do. I was called to the ICU on my third day as an intern to draw blood from a patient… as if I could get it when the extremely experienced nurses couldn’t! I would round at 4 am to make sure I got all of the information I needed for rounds. It was so overwhelming. I couldn’t believe how many times a pager could go off – on Vascular surgery, about 98 times in one day! I don’t know how we did it. This isn’t even scratching the surface of the experience… But like I said, it’s hard for me even to remember.
8. My Rotation in Oral Surgery
The County Hospital. Patients everywhere screaming in pain with tooth infections. Three interns set loose to just inject numbing medicine and pull teeth with barely any instruction. I don’t know how I made it through that month. I was so terrified of getting bit, hit or inoculated with hepatitis. Don’t even get me started on going up to the mental ward to examine a tooth… No one should ever hear that story.
9. My Saddest Birthday
When I turned 28, I was scrubbing for a case with the Chief Resident. It felt weird just keeping my birthday to myself, no one knew. So to make conversation I awkwardly said “Um, so it’s my birthday,” while we scrubbed. He basically just said “Huh, oh.” Later on he brought a plastic surgery journal to my call room, and said, “Hey, I got two this month. So happy birthday”.
10. The County ER
This could be an entire book. I have so much love for San Francisco General Hospital, I might have to learn how to sing and write music so I can make a love ballad about it. The ER there was pretty wild. One time I put a staple in someone’s stabbed heart as we rushed them up to the OR. My heroes work at that hospital.
11. People Actually Play That Hand/Knife Game From Aliens
I spent Christmas Eve sewing up 5 drunk guys hands in the ER my second year of residency. They had been drinking and playing this game where you stab a knife really quickly between the spaces of your fingers with your hand flat on the table. I remembered it from Aliens. One guy was throwing up in a bucket the whole time I washed out his hand and closed it up. I guess that was a sad Christmas… But I thought it was pretty fun!
12. Getting Yelled At
I remember holding the phone away from my ear as the Vascular Surgery fellow screamed at me with multiple expletives NSFHG because I hadn’t gotten consent from a Russian-speaking patient for surgery. I was waiting for a Russian interpreter, because that is the right thing to do, but he was pissed I didn’t just make the patient sign the consent. Or maybe he was mad that I didn’t speak Russian. Anyway.
13. That One Patient
We all love caring for our patients, but every once in a while there is one that really gets to you. I had a lovely patient as a surgical resident. Her smile lit up the room and she had the most positive outlook. She died suddenly on the ward after a successful surgery. We tried to resuscitate her for what felt like hours, I was left crying in her room alone. The autopsy was not conclusive. I still think about her all the time, I still miss her.
14. Carrying a Finger
We were going to do a replant of a patients amputated finger and as an eager surgical intern, I was given the honored duty of getting the finger to the OR while the more senior resident took care of the patient. It’s sort of like being a ring bearer.
15. Switching to Anesthesia!!!
I made lots of friends who were anesthesia residents and I talked to a lot of anesthesia attendings. They were so cool and their job so amazing. Never had I thought of it… I was gung ho surgery, but then I started thinking. After much investigation and soul searching, I decided to make the switch. I loved the OR and the ICU and with anesthesia, those were the only places I ever had to be. I love it and I have never looked back. Well, laparoscopic surgery and doing nice wound closures is really fun, but no. I love anesthesia.
16. Cutting the Cord
As an anesthesia resident in labor and delivery, there was a woman having an emergency C Section who was entirely alone. No one was there with her, no husband/boyfriend/family member. We all found ourselves at a loss when it was time to cut the newborns umbilical cord, so I stepped up.
17. The Last Day
I had a neurosurgery lineup for my last day as an anesthesia resident. I was excited, emotional, all that. I did one craniotomy case, took the patient up to the ICU, and went back down to set up my OR. Lo and behold, my last case was cancelled. I. Was. Done. With. Residency.
There are so many more memories – this has really opened a floodgate for me! I am just so thankful for all of the amazing training, teaching and mentorship that I have had over the years. I am thankful for all the support of my incredible family and friends through the blood (literally), sweat and tears. I am thankful for the amazing and brilliant people I have worked with, and the friendships that remain strong. I am also thankful and indebted to the patients who helped me learn to be a good doctor.
Thank you for listening! It’s been quite a ride! No matter where you are in working toward a goal, remember that you will eventually get there. As painful as it is at times, the years of hard work are some of the best and most interesting years of your life. When it’s all done, it really does seem like it flew by…
Image via http://scrubs.wikia.com
See more posts from Alexandra
10.17.2011 |
SUBSCRIBE
COMMENTS
please help us maintain positive conversations by refraining from posting spam, advertisements, and links to other websites or blogs. we reserve the right to remove your comment if it does not adhere to these guidelines. thanks! post a comment.
I love your writing.
Thank you so much!
Thanks for sharing this! You’re such a great storyteller.
I love getting the chance to share some stories! Thank you!
<3
<3 to you!
I truly love and appreciate your articles, dude! I’m a pre-med student and it’s really helpful and awesome to see someone sharing what they’ve learned from the med school experience (that I am both excited and terrified about). Thanks for your honesty, doc
You are in for a long and awesome road! Let me know if you have any questions!
Thanks for sharing this. It’s funny how many of the items on your list have applied to me at some point (I’m a PA), but #13 really echoes with me – I had a young guy with an amazing outlook who died suddenly with an inconclusive autopsy. Three years later, I still think about him, his wife and his three young kids.
It’s the most haunting thing in the world! I think we all go through it at some point, and it only becomes more likely the longer we are in our field. Ugh. It hurts. It also makes you appreciate how fragile and precious life is though… I tell everyone I love them, all the time. Obsessively.
Girl, I don’t know how this keeps happening. But every time I am ready to give up on premed entirely, you post something that gives me perspective again. Like the ways to stay awake, and now this.
Your story is great and def. inspiring! Thanks so much for sharing! Its been totally encouraging to me today, especially after bombing a chem exam. ha!
Girl, I don’t know how this keeps happening. But every time I am ready to give up on premed entirely, you post something that gives me perspective again. Like the ways to stay awake, and now this.
Your story is great and def. inspiring! Thanks so much for sharing! Its been totally encouraging to me today, especially after bombing a chem exam. ha!
You can do whatever you want to do, Miss! I dropped out of college for a minute… There are ups and downs, but you will get wherever you want to be. Email me any time!
Congratulations, girl!
Well thank you, name twin!
Wow! I loved this story! And I totally relate to the diagnosing. I’m a nutrition student and I always find my self mentally diagnosing friends with nutrient deficiencies and laugh at all the students who can’t help themselves in classes, like clinical examination, when we are told to “switch our naturopathic brains off” a case study comes up and someone can’t help but yell out “B12 deficiency!”. But really, I just love hearing how passionate you still are, after 9 years of study. It’s very motivating. So well done, and good luck!
Haha! So funny. I have pica… Just kidding. Nutrition is so cool!
This is one of the best posts I have ever read on HelloGiggles! Seriously, spectacular!
Um, this is like the biggest compliment EVER. We have some amazing posts on this site!!! Thank you!!!! So glad you enjoyed it!
“As painful as it is at times, the years of hard work are some of the best and most interesting years of your life” couldn’t be more true….I too, love being a med-student despite all the sacrifices and the obstacles that present each day.
What year are you? So exciting! Enjoy it! And don’t be afraid to get in there and help out when you do your clinical rotations. Especially in the OR
I’ve just started my first rotation
..when I say obstacles, Boy is the one me and my classmates going through is a big one…but every night I just pray that everything will resolve and each one of us will be able to cross the finish line …this post certainly makes me smile
This is awesome! We need to be best friends immediately. This seems possible since I write for HG, too. And this seems necessary as I am a huge Hypochondriac.
Let’s do this! Are you kidding me? I love your articles. I am always looking for hilarious friends who are terrified of disease! My two favorite things are laughing and talking medical stuff. And brunch. So we can do that at brunch. Done.
Congratulations! You must be so relieved and excited! I just had my first residency interview today… time flies.
For what?!!? Oh my goodness! Good luck! Interview season is nutso, but so exciting!
Thanks! Pathology!
So cool! I would love it! I have a fantasy of going back and doing path so I can be a forensic pathologist (too much SVU for me).
congrats darling!!
Thank you my dear!!!
Big ups on passing your exams!! That’s awesome. Tell everyone, everywhere, for as long as you like because you quite rightly should be massively proud of yourself!!
Well I did get “BOARD CERTIFIED” tattooed on my face… Haha. Thanks!
Congrats many times! I imagine you treated yourself super well.
“Yes, I have sawed a body in half. Please still like me”
This should be a club. I was the tankmate that sawed the face in half, and some people don’t see me the same way anymore.
This made me laugh out loud. Seriously. Unfortunately I am too afraid to type the other horrible things that we have to do… But um, tank o heads anyone???
And yes. I had an online shopping tornado to celebrate a little…
Whooops. Just had my typo brought to my attention. It’s hypOchondria. But whatever. You know what I mean. That is just how over it I am. No more self diagnosing here!
(Plus, hyper- is indicative of excessive activity, so it makes more sense to me anyway. Maybe they will just change the spelling for me someday).
Your writing makes me happy then sad then happy again. thanks for sharing
Thanks for reading! I’m glad it ended on happy
Your #13 made me cry. I know we are new friends, but man am I proud of you girlie! What a ride!
And you are saving our youth… So I am proud of you new friend! Let’s hang out soon!
Congratulations!!! My bf is a surgery resident, and it’s nice to hear his stories from another perspective. He’s such a trooper, as are you! Thx for being an inspiration to pre-meds like me.
Woah, good for you for dating a resident! You are an angel. My husband says dating me in residency was like having a baby- I only slept, cried, and ate. Haha. Good luck in premed! Enjoy everything!
Congrats!! I’ve got two more years of med school to go and I don’t even want to think about how many years until I get to where you are now, but thanks for giving us hope that there is a light at the end of the tunnel… and that you can still be cool when you get there
There is a light! It is all worth it. I miss residency a lot, but also not at all. Hahaha. And girl, if you START cool, you will stay cool. I say this like I’m cool….. Which is debatable.
Congratulations, and good luck with everything
Thank you!!!
Love this! Congrats! I wish I wasn’t eating breakfast while reading this! But it was funny.. I had to keep reading!
– Miranda
Ha! I’m glad I held back! Maybe I should have people eat nothing after midnight if they are going to read my articles. Just like surgery.
Wow, thanks for sharing this! As a college student planning on going into medicine, I like hearing from someone on the other side. Good luck in your career, and congratulations!
Yes! There is another side! It’s a long road, and there are lots of sacrifices… But it’s so worth it. Good luck!
I truly enjoyed this. Thanks for sharing. I was in the hospital for two months surrounding my heart transplant and it’s funny how much of this stuff the nurses begin sharing. I really liked dealing with the fellows: they were the easiest to read when we weren’t getting straight answers. Haha!
Heart Transplant? You are a badass! Yeah… Fellows can’t bluff. You are so right. Hahaha. I hope your hospital experiences are few and far between now!
I’m proud to say that I have observed some of the stuff you talked about in your article. :p I’m a pre-med student, and I’ve done a lot of shadowing in the surgical oncology department of a local hospital…I’m sure you understand me when I say that the first time I saw a mastectomy (modified radical- I have no words) I was never the same again. Thanks so much for sharing this! I’m gonna pass it on to all of my pre-med friends.
Hahahaha. Yup. Once you cross that line, well, you are never the same
Good luck!
I am in CRNA school and I love love your posts. The one about studying with the pic of all the anesthesia books made me laugh because I’m looking at the same stack in my living room right now. Congrats on passing your Boards!!! You are about to enjoy all the perks of your hard work
We are such book junkies. So cool that you are in CRNA school! Anesthesia is the best. Good luck with school! I miss the CRNAs at UCSF and SFGH!!!
Yay for medical jargon! As an ER and ICU nurse, I loved reading this.
Ha! I know. The secret language.
I love reading your posts, because I’m pre-med! It’s refreshing ad awesome to see someone who has gone through all of the training and loves it still. Congratulations on all of your hard work and accomplishments!!
It’s pretty hard not to love it. Good luck!!! It’s a long, fun road!
You have certainly inspired me. Thank you! Med school sounds difficult and incredible.
It’s awesome. I’d do it all over again. Probably.
Wow I loved reading this , especially now that I am a bit tired and I don’t know , confused with what I am stuying (Physical Terapy), I am having a hard time now , and somehow this cheers me up a little bit
, thank you for sharing this
Hang in there, it gets better! The long study nights get rough though… Reward yourself!
I really enjoy reading your posts. I’m applying to do premed next year so you’re pretty much an inspiration.
Fantastic! I love it! Keep working hard, it’s worth it!
I lovedddd this!!! As a 1st year med student I can totally relate and laugh and fear at the same time what’s to come haha thanks alexandra!