Single Girls Guide Part 8

The lovely Sophia Rossi, co-creator of HelloGiggles and all around sassy brunette, took it upon herself to put this edition of Single Girls Guide into your hands by tweeting for everyone to tell me what they want to hear about.


First up is, “How to deal with being a third wheel?”


I think being a third wheel is great for a single girl. What could be better than someone coming up to the table looking to flirt and you’re the only one eligible? No competition around when you’re the single wheel. Tough cookies for your girlfriend when the hottie waiting at the bar slides up next to you guys, ’cause this one is yours. They’re all yours. Your friend hates you. In addition to that, you’re always traveling with insurance. Some guy meets you and thinks, “Hmm…she’s cute, she seems fun, and has a nice rack, but is she secretly crazy?” Well, that’s when your trusty friends give him the thumbs up. He feels confident about your sanity since you are secure enough to third wheel it and also have friends, which is a great combination. I feel like I’m at my best when I’m around a couple. I’m able to bestie out with the girl while safely showing my flirtatious side with the guy. And if he goes home at night wishing I was his girlfriend, well that’s not my problem. He’s telling all his friends, “If only I could…” stories and that’s making me even more desirable to them. It’s really a win-win situation for me. Oh, I mean you. Whatever, you get the point. Get a set of couple friends immediately.


Second question is, “What are some good comebacks for bad pickup lines?”


Ladies, there is no good response to a traditional pickup line because they are ridiculous. Every decent guy I’ve spoken to about this says that they don’t use pickup lines, they just speak from the heart. No, they speak from their pants, but I’m pretty sure that the success rate with a direct and honest pickup is much higher than that of, “I lost my number, can I have yours?” The pickup line is just a formality, we know in the first forty-five seconds of talking to a guy if we’re interested or not. An unappealing guy is probably not going to win us over with a line and a great guy isn’t going to lose us without one. The simplest way to talk to a girl is to say hi. We know what you want. We wore a padded bra tonight (this is considered very 90’s, but I still totally wear them). Picking up a girl is about chemistry, not confusing her into talking to you. Once I was sitting at M Café, eating alone and listening to music with headphones (fine, it was a self help book on tape) and this guy literally motioned for me to take the headphones out and when I did he said, “I could tell you were really wanting to talk to me so I thought I’d say hi. I’ll sit with you.” Now, I should have found a polite way to say no thank you, but instead I acted uncomfortable while he sat down, and then I just did that thing where you keep starting to put the headphones back in hoping they get the point. He didn’t. He ruined my meal and my night. Even though I hate that guy in a serious way, I can’t imagine the pressure of being a guy and having to come up with a way to talk to a girl. I wouldn’t want to approach me. I roll my eyes more than that little girl in the YouTube video where she rolls her eyes every five seconds. The point is that it takes a brave guy to approach you and so you should be cool about it. The second point is that you guys really creep us out sometimes and should just be direct. In response, we should give you a direct response so you can take your game to the girl at the next bar stool. Did I even answer the question? I’m the worst.


Third is, “How do we meet nice, smart guys who aren’t afraid of strong women?”


Well, to this I say to you that as soon as you are into nice, smart guys, I’m sure they will be into strong, amazing women. We’re all guilty of being attracted to the wrong person. They’re afraid of strong women like we’re afraid of good guys. It’s intimidating being with someone who is worth it. Someone who is a challenge and who doesn’t need us. It’s so much easier being with someone who we have power over, who depends on us. It takes a really mature person to want something more than that and I think that’s the goal we all have. I know successful women who keep thirty employees under them in check, and go home to a boyfriend who’s an out of work actor, playing on the Xbox, with his hand in his sweatpants. It happens. We love who we love, even when we’re able to rationalize the issues that made us choose them. Remember that being strong doesn’t have to mean being intimidating. Have warmth in your strength and be approachable. Bossing someone around and acting superior makes you look like an asshole. The strong girl is the one who leaves quietly when she’s had enough. Not the one who makes a scene. Give nicer guys a chance and then maybe they’ll open up to the stronger ladies.

In conclusion to all of these answers… what would Beyonce do?


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