Wherever you’ve been and whoever you were, your experiences made you who you are today. And that makes them kind of awesome.
However much they make you cringe, the selves of the past, the memories you look on and think “Oh. My. God.” were things you had to go through and they took you down the strange path that influenced your future. Adolescence is a time when all the rules have to be defined for ourselves and that takes a lot of mis-stepping and trying on of different personalities. Those past experiences, though sometimes painful, are what give us powers of understanding that we wouldn’t have otherwise. And though I don’t think we should all get on a desk in an important meeting and belt out our secrets to everyone a cappella, I think every part of us should be kept and embraced as a swatch of our fabric. A super colorful one that we can look on with acceptance and even embrace.
Acting Dumb Faze
This is typical for many of us, especially girls for whatever reason. Oh yeah! Because main stream media tells us dumb girls are sexy. Well, girls often go through a faze of acting stupid and air-headed, dumbing-down their abilities to get boys to like them. This might be an evolutionary tactic in which case that’s kind of brilliant, like a Venus fly trap, but it’s icky to remember when you’re a self-respecting adult. Well, even this just got owned. Acting dumb is a terrible thing to do and if you happen to be a kid mark my words – not worth it for anyone for any reason.
Lots of people have a time in their life when some really painful stuff is stuck inside and they act out as a result of those feelings. We all know someone that went through a life-long faze like this and died as a result of it. It’s terrible and scary but if you went through it and came out the other side, that says a lot about how far you’ve come to be where you are today. Let that be a part of you that you can offer to others that are in need. When you can relate things you’ve overcome to others that need it you have in a small way helped to save the world.
Lots of us go through a metamorphosis through adolescence and even in adulthood physically, mentally, and fashion-wise. There’s nothing better than sharing those versions of yourself with your closest friends. Those photos that are locked away are embarrassing but when you share that part of yourself you can feel proud of it. Even the act says a lot about you – that you’re confident and comfortable in your skin today. Where you were at different ages and what you identified with in music or culture says a lot, and when you share it with those you love, it only leads to more closeness and understanding.
Here’s a personal story that I will own, and for the sake of my future career as a politician (kidding) I will keep it PG. I have several tattoos, two of which I did with two of my best friends with India ink and needles in my bedroom at age 13. Like F-ing idiots. They were terrible. One on my stomach looked like a five year old tried to draw a bee while hanging upside down. Using a burnt stick. But I was too eager to be cool (‘cause tattoos are cool forever) and I couldn’t help myself. I have since had these covered with other professionally done tattoos now but I wish I didn’t. What that symbolizes about me as a person and where we all were is beautiful and it makes me smile.
That was a silly example but of course I have and we all have deeper ones that are harder to talk about. By acknowledging all of our experiences to ourselves and to our friends we can feel liberated. Scars are layers to a person’s understanding, and they’re like x-ray glasses into the human soul. Wherever you’ve been and whatever you’ve let go of, moved on from, grown out of, fought against, ran from, own it. And be proud.