Harps Not Lyres

Moustaches: A Love Story

Guys. I want to spend a little time talking about my love affair…with moustaches. If you know me, you know that anything with a moustache on it is bound to brighten my day and elicit a squeal of delight. But why? Let me break this down for you.

First of all: I have a moustache that has magical powers. Relax, it’s not a moustache that I grow from my ladyface, it’s a hot pink moustache necklace that my boyfriend gave me as a gift. In fact, this moustache necklace was custom made by Angela from Triptophonic Studios who is an incredible artist located in Waupaca, WI, of all places. Confession: I MUST wear this necklace every time I perform an improv show with my team Frenemies, or at the VERY least have it in my pocket. Data suggests (rather strongly) that without this moustache, I do not perform as well.  It also makes me so so HAPPY, so that’s pretty magical.

Second of all: Moustaches on a stick. Get one. Nothing feels better than when you’re mid-conversation and you know that your next sentence would be enhanced times a billion if you only had a moustache, and then all of the sudden you DO. In these instances, I turn away really fast, pick up my moustache on a stick, and turn back around to say something akin to “Oh, really?” or “How very interesting” or “Yesssss.” Twirling the moustache helps to prove your point.  If you think I do not use this method at my place of work, you are wrong. Let’s just say that my apartment, office and car may or may not be littered with moustaches on a stick. Hint: they are.

Third of all: People with moustaches. I love them. Got a Tom Selleck ‘stache?  Let’s be best friends. If you have the cojones to rock a moustache that is large and in charge, then you are probably a really fun person to hang out with. Basically, if you are committed enough to meticulously groom your moustache, you’ll probably also be a super committed friend and give heartwarming, creative gifts. That’s solid logic, right? Moustaches are simply the most amazing accessory and I am so so jealous that I can never have a real one. Granted, I guess it would be a weird “flesh moustache” a la Spencer Pratt, since I’m blonde and all, but hey, a girl can dream.

Fourth of all: Clothing with moustaches. I’ll wear it. Shirts, ties, shoelaces, vests, headbands, bring it on! I’m currently having a hard time finding moustache clothes that are cute and small, but I know that if I could get my hot little hands on some more gear, I’d wear it all the time. Something about being in a moustache shirt or putting a fake moustache on my face (which I count as clothing) makes me feel all giggly and happy. Right now, I’m currently lusting over these moustache shoes from Toms, which are limited edition to support Movember. Which brings me to my last point…


Fifth of all: Did you know that this month is Movember? Movember is a 30 day initiative to raise funds and awareness for men’s health and cancers that affect men. Dudes start off clean shaven on November 1st and spend the rest of the month grooming and rocking their ‘staches while friends donate on each guy’s personal Movember page. What a great way to spark conversation and inspire awareness about men’s health! Moustaches, you win again, but then again, you always do.

If you are looking for someone to support this Movember, I recommend my friend Nick Mundy from Team Tiger Awesome. Click HERE to donate or to check out his amazing moustache.

Image via Toms

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