Teenage Wasteland

Mean Girls

I may or may not watch the movie Mean Girls every month (its sort of like a ritual) and invite all the girls in my class over, only to have them blow me off, like, every time. I laugh at the irony. Unfortunately, the movie Mean Girls is not what this post is about. Well, it kinda is, because of the name except not really because… okay.

One of the reasons why I started using the internet (which means actually talking to people and not dressing up Miley Cyrus on girlsgogames.com or playing ToonTown, because if so then I’ve been on the internet since I was 2) was because I was bullied at school from mean girls. When I was about 10, this girl sent out an e-mail to everyone saying that I was secretly dating Justin Bieber and ate chips all day, which I have no idea why I was offended by but apparently I was. I made a Tumblr and made amazing friends and realized, hey, your friends don’t have to live in the same city as you! They can live in a town that I’m not able to pronounce or spell and live 6 hours away, and that’s okay, too. Although most of the girls at my new school aren’t very nice to me either, I’ve realized the key on how to survive a mean girl, which I think is going to be really good for me because I start 7th grade soon.

Even though punching her in the face may seem like the right thing at the moment, it’s obviously not going to be good for you later. If you haven’t already heard this from your Mom, Dad, councilor, therapist, teacher, the police officer that comes to your school in 5th grade to talk to you about peer pressure or nice people online who are actually decent human beings, then I’ll tell you this right now: You need to stand up to them. Even if no one is there to back you up and there are 50 of her sidekicks all ready to make you feel horrible, it would be better than running away or punching her in the face. Most likely, you’re smarter, wittier and funnier then her, so why don’t you just make a come-back that’s NOT MEAN, but smart?

A few months ago, someone started a rumour about me, where I apparently said this girl was a loser. I lost all of my friends at school. Of course, because I’m talking about 11-year-old girls, they forgot about it a week later and they forgave me, except that the girl who I supposedly said was a loser gives me the stink eye every time she sees me. Things between us still aren’t that great but I started going to acting class and have made some nice friends there and I’ve also met some awesome people online, too. If you’re having troubles with friends at school then just remember that your school isn’t the only source for friends in your town.

Then there’s the Mean Girls online. You would probably be more familiar with this type. Online, girls think they can say whatever they want because its the internet and the person they’re being mean to has no way of knowing it’s them behind that anonymous face. If you get a mean comment online, just remember that whoever did it was a) too much of a coward to say it to your face, that’s why they did it anonymously and b) they probably feel insecure about themselves and are jealous of you. Why would they put the time and the energy into making you feel bad? Disable the anonymous option in the ask box. Really.

I didn’t make this post about “bullies” because that applies to girls and boys. Yes, boys can be mean and rude except girls are just… BLAH. When you see someone get something on Tumblr that says “You’re ugly” or “You’re disgusting”, do you really think that a boy is responsible for doing that? If boys get in a fight, they punch each other in the face and then they’re friends again. Girls don’t usually do that. They’ll be sneaky and turn everyone against you and use mean words to hurt you instead of physically hurting you. At one time or another, every girl in the world has been mean. I’ve had my bad moments, you’ve had your bad moments. I’m not trying to diss the 3,500,000,000 gals in the world but I personally think it’s in a girl’s nature.

Featured Image Via Drafthouse

  • http://www.facebook.com/pamelavandalsen Pamela Pamer-Van Dalsen

    My daughter is her age and has a speech impairment. People tease and pick on her because of something she can’t control. I’m going to have her read this. Great job an congrats on getting it on hellogiggles.

  • http://www.facebook.com/mspahlin Melissa Jean

    Great Article and I love your tumblr, just looked it up after reading. You seem to be a well spoken and confident 12 year old. Other girls who aren’t sure of themselves probably have difficulty with that. Keep standing up for yourself. Congrats on the article!

  • Becca Sands

    Awesome job, Mikaela! I was around your age when the internet started getting big and I was allowed on. Like you, I started finding some great friends and realized that I didn’t need to rely on people at my school to be my support system. Now, at 23, I have friends who have been my best friends for ten years–all of whom I met online, not a single one from school. Some might judge us for that, but we know what’s up! Stay positive and only surround yourself with people who make you smile, and you’ll be great. You’re a good kid!

  • http://www.facebook.com/morgan.garrett2 Morgan Garrett

    You are ridiculously wise for your age! Girls will always be petty, but learning not to let them define you is the key to surviving middle school and high school. You’re awesome!

  • http://www.facebook.com/marcelle.karp Marcelle Karp

    gurl, i can so relate! the girls can be meean but you are right! STAND UP!
    ichat soon!
    -ruby (on my mom’s facebook)

    • http://m-i-k-a-e-l-a.tumblr.com mikaela

      thank you!!!! yeah lets ichat soon! :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1315121322 Elena Gregson

    Mikaela, I think I’m going to have my 5th grade girls (and maybe even the boys) read your posts on here. You’re so smart and I think the kids in my class will really relate to you. Some of them may have Tumblr, so I’ll recommend they follow you on there, too. Your writing is so honest and you have a great writers’ voice. I love reading what you have to say and I know my students will, too!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002451813782 Bec Ng

    Hi Mikaela!! My name is Bec and I’m 12 years old too. I live in Australia.
    I think your writing is really great. I absolutely agree on this topic as I have also experienced it too. I hope we can be friends on facebook or something. XX Bec

  • http://www.facebook.com/sshho Sophie Hayes Oatman

    hi im sophie, im 12, and your my twin. :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=528004179 Jane Murphy

    Great post! At the time, it seems like school is the most important thing in the world – especially high school – and I guess it is, but I’ve come to realise at the ripe, old age of 29 (!) that it really is a tiny part of life. You seem to have realised this a lot earlier than me – well done!

  • http://www.facebook.com/devin.n.chance Devin Chance

    Mikaela, you are so amazing! You are speaking the absolute truth! I admire your confidence so so much. And I can’t believe you’re 12…I could have never said this at 12! Please please continue writing more about these topics because people (young and old) need to hear it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1227706448 Amanda Rae Billings

    Even at 22 I still have to deal with mean girls on an occasional basis, and I remember middle school wasn’t the best time for me either. Just keep being awesome! You’ve got it all going for you. Keep it up!

  • http://www.facebook.com/jenaroseevans Jena Rose Evans

    Such a wonderful and inspiring article. I am so happy you found other ways to make yourself happy and stand up for yourself. Always remember Public school and high school are not forever, these things will become a distant memory; you are going to grow up to be a super rad, intellectual woman who is confident about herself, I can’t say the same for all these mean girls out there. Keep being you, keep standing up for yourself and remember to be kind to everyone else. If you ever have a down day, listen to Taylor Swifts “mean” on a repeat I am 25 and I find the need some days!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=42900982 Heather Rohnert

    You should check out The Kind Campaign! It’s a movement that brings awareness and healing to the negative and lasting effects of girl-against-girl bullying and promotes KINDness! Keep your chin up! You sound like an awesome girl!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002559557897 Benthe van Wanrooij

    Wow. You’re such I good writer, I feel your emotions. Gorgeous, girl.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1547103762 Andrea Bergman

    I like that you stand up by being smarter. Good for you.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001894696197 Allison Frankfother

    Wow!! I thank God you have learned this lesson and stand firm in it….I”m 18 and still struggling! You are so strong and confident. You have no idea how much pain and heartbreak this will save you over the years – even beyond the realm of just mean girls.

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