I would like to say that I hope it was never, but I would be hypocritical.
By now you have likely heard, but in case you have not, Amy Cheney, a mother of three hailing from Australia, found a diet plan in her seven year old’s bedroom. Because her daughter is seven years old, most things were completely misspelled, and it took a bit of time for Cheney to decipher everything in the “diyet” plan. The list entailed “healthy” foods with empty boxes next to them to check off throughout the day, as well as exercises such as “pooshups” two times a day, and “jog/run up and down the driv way” three times.
Do you feel sick? Cheney did, and she writes about the anger and sadness she felt that society has built her daughter up to believe that she is not perfect. At seven years old. When she finally discussed the issue with her daughter, she discovered that her friend, also seven years old, was on a diet, which is why she felt the need to participate, as well.
What does a seven year old’s body even have to burn? No seven year old should know what a calorie is. No seven year old should know about stupid workout regimens. The biggest worry in a seven year old’s life should be bickering at school, or learning how to write in cursive–if that’s a thing still.
Girls, and yes, it starts at an incredibly young age, have long been put through the ringer in this society. The images and people that we are “supposed” to idealize are humiliating. We do not focus on body types, we focus on one image of perfection that is an impossibility for most of us. Models are forced down our throats on the cover of magazines, and in advertisements, and on the sides of buses, and in our magazines. I will never look like a Victoria Secret model, and you know what? Neither will a Victoria Secret model. Everything is enhanced, nothing is real, no one is happy with what we have because we are taught to strive for something that does not matter. Flat stomachs, and toned arms, and two piece swimsuits are made to be the most important thing in the world to a young woman, and there are so many actually important issues in the world that we, as young, intelligent, full-of-potential women should not have to care about calories and being “svelte.”
The media should be ashamed of themselves, long ago, they should have been ashamed of themselves.
The first time I heard the word diet was when I was ten years old. I had just changed from that “baby fat” adorable to that…”maybe she is going to be fat” stage. I didn’t notice, nor did I care about anything that did not involve the three and a half hour movie I was spending every day going to see. Every time I went to see Titanic (yep, it was eleven times…during its first run), I had a giant soda, a refillable popcorn, a large bag of Skittles, and my older cousin. Do you know how many calories are in all of that?! Do you know that I didn’t know what a calorie was? Nothing could keep me from my tradition. Diet and exercise were the last thing on my mind, granted, I spent time outside playing with my brothers and cousins, and stuff. My body type was just not the kind to keep weight off. That’s a thing, you guys: “fat” does not always mean lazy. My older brother eats the worst food imaginable, and he is the skinniest person alive. I, however, eat extremely healthy 95% of the time, and I still have an impossible amount of junk not just in the trunk, but all over my body.
And when it was released in 3D, the tradition continued.
But you know what? I don’t care about a two piece swimsuit, and I don’t care about breaking my back trying to fit into a size 4? or 6? What are people striving for these days?
Thank you for your post! I grew up with a mom who was constantly telling me that I took after my dad’s family who are overweight and so I have always been self conscious about my weight. It hasn’t been until recently that I’ve realized how pointless it is to agonize over every pound. The importance lies in eating healthy and living as a happy person.
When I was about 14 my cousin told me that when I would be 18 that I would have lost a lot of my weight (I was always a chubby kid). and when you are young you believe your older cousins, but ofcourse I didn’t end up being a slimmer 18 year old (despite cycling for 1,5 hours a day and 4 hours of sport activities in a week.) That was the first time I actually was confronted by a family member about my weight.
Nowadays I’m 27 and my parents like to think that they are giving me “small” hints as to the way I look. My dad will say, maybe you should find a gym nearby or he would say things like “should you be eating that”. Recently he’s been showing me pictures and saying to me “look at you in there” and I can tell by the tone of his voice that he really wants me to do something about it. However hard he thinks he may be trying to help it just makes me feel worse.
I know I really should try and be more sensible about what I eat and how much I exercise, but I really cannot be bothered if everybody arounds me seems to constantly remind me of just how much better I could look. I get it people you think I’m ugly. Well a slimmer/prettier me still won’t change you in to a kinder person.
A class about eating healthy food might be welcome at school. Signing kids up for sports may also help to keep them in shape, but please don’t make them obsessed with calories and diets.
Josein, I can tell by your words that you are a beautiful person. If you feel good and are happy, then forget the words of everyone else. I have been heavier and happier, I have been skinnier and much more depressed, so what it all boils down to is personal joy. If you love yourself, you will be loved. xoxoxo
Ok, I hadn’t previously seen the story. I don’t know anything about the mother or daughter. I agree that children should be given love and positive reinforcement, and yes, da***t, children should be allowed to be kids without all the societal pressure.
But that doesn’t change the fact that there are children who are dangeriously obese out there. I had a friend whose seven yr old daughter weighed at least 50lbs more than I as an adult did. At a height of perhaps 4′ 9″ she weighed at least 175lbs to my 5’7″ and 110lbs. Her mother weighed over 300lbs. This was a child (and her mother) who needed to be on a diet and counting calories.
My point is that dieting and calorie-counting shouldn’t be automatically dismissed just because it’s a 7 yr old child. Health is important from the day you are born to the day you die. My weight (or lack of) is due to medical issues, for which I’m under a doctor’s care. (For the record I am neither anorexic nor bullemic.) But for most women, aspiring to be model thin is as unhealthy as being morbidly obese. Your doctor can tell you if you (or any children you might have) are in a healthy weight range, pay attention to what they say. It’s far better to have some healthy padding on you than to be stick thin.
I honestly have a hard time believing that note to be accurate. I know the girl is only 7, but i have a hard time believing education systems are failing children that horribly.
However, I do agree that weight issues start young and viciously. I have always been a bigger girl. I remember in middle school gym class, all the girls lining up to be weighed and quite a few making snarky comments about my size. I remember a dizzying battle with weight since I turned 11. Now at 26, I am finally breaking the battle and it took having a baby to get there.
This is lovely. My mom and dad always told me I was beautiful/unique/other kind things, but I have friends whose parents have been critical and even cruel. It sticks with them, and that breaks my heart.
“I will never look like a Victoria Secret model, and you know what? Neither will a Victoria Secret model.”
BEST LINE and it is so true. Thank you for this great post!