Style Watch: Ink is the new pink! Believe it or not, ink stains are now the hottest accessories for any outfit. By now, you may have already seen people wearing ink-stained attire on the cover of Vogue and and gracing the runways of Paris. Calvin Klein is said to be planning to add ink blotches to his clothing line at a drastic price mark-up, while some stylish teens on a budget are taking the initiative and dribbling leaky pens on the clothes they already own.
Okay, okay, I should probably admit that ink is not an actual trend… yet. You see, I made the mistake of leaving a pen in my pants pocket when I did a load of laundry and now I have serious ink blots all over my clothing. Now I’m faced with the prospect of either buying a whole new wardrobe or convincing everyone that my t-shirts with stray ink smudges are actually super cool.
I mean, it worked for torn jeans, right? I’m sure at some point somebody accidentally ripped a hole in her jeans, and rather than throwing them out because they were ruined, she just called it a fashion statement instead. Pretty soon, kids were – nonsensically – intentionally cutting up their own jeans because it seemed like the hip thing to do.
So let’s just declare it so – henceforth, it is officially cool to have black or blue blots sprinkled along the collar of your shirt, around your socks, and all over the crotch and rear of your shorts. Sure, shake your head now, but when you seen Katy Perry on the red carpet with a large ebony blotch prominently on the backside of her tight pants, you’re going to wish that you stained your wardrobe with ink sooner.
Plus, if you’ll recall on Saved by the Bell – the only television show that matters – the nerds wear pocket protectors. Need I remind you, nerds are super uncool. So if it’s uncool to protect your pocket, then it must be way cool to have pen stains. Got it?
Of course, if you’re smart enough to follow that logic, you’re probably already on board with my new style. That’s because you realize that everyone would be a walking Rorschach Inkblot Test. Finally, a fashion craze that really says something about you.