Champagne Problems Kids Are Cooler Than Us JC Coccoli

The world is your oyster, kid, now get out there and eat it up. That’s the hip life of a tiny human, right? Fun? Running? Eating? Playing? Napping? (Remember naps?) I mean, I still take naps now, obviously, but they are usually in my car seconds before my third meeting of the day. Kids have it good. Actually, they have it the best. They are living, breathing proof that we big humans take our lives too seriously. It’s true. I know that because I am writing this as I sign yet another check to the Los Angeles Parking Enforcement only after I yelled out loud (to no one FYI) “I hate cars!” That’s when I came to terms with the fact that I am no longer embracing the fun. We are thrown into adulthood quicker than the olden days. Back then kids were kids for a while. Now,  youth is something that is quite ambiguous. Meaning, I do a ton of adult things on a daily basis with little to know activity in the whimsical “kid-like” department.

Now, yes, I am a comic and yes, I do laugh all the time.  The problem is having traditional fun. Because in my experience, “traditional fun” is few and far between unless it is accompanied by a glass of wine and a calm and mature dinner party by it’s side. Because that’s the lifestyle now. As an adult. But as a kid don’t you remember having the time of your life anytime anywhere with little to no regard to consequence. What a feeling that must be.  I wish we could go back to that. Once or twice a year. Like, a “kid day.”

That would be totes amazing but I am almost positive it can and will never happen. I am learning that adults (even the cool ones) prefer to be adults because of the lifestyle. The boat in the marina, the frequent flyer miles on their car, the jacuzzi in the back yard and that car with the seat warmers. (Oh, the seat warmers!) Ooh wee, the good life! But who cares? I don’t care. I don’t think I care. Maybe I will care but right now as I shovel Chinese food in my mouth, I don’t. I wish I could go outside and slam my next door neighbor in the head with a Nerf ball again without the cops coming. Or run laps on the softball field because I consumed not one but three fun dips that are made purely out of colored sugar. Those were the days. When you collected lightening bugs and referred to them as your BFF or sat outside on a stoop, or ran around outside for hide n’ go seek, those days don’t happen anymore. Thanks to a ton of incredible technology, who even knows if they will happen again. But this isn’t to get you down. It’s just to pump you up for an organized “kid day” that you can plan anytime, anywhere. I say go for it. Everybody in the office already thinks you’re crazy, why not swallow paste and drive the point home? Here’s to you, “kid day”.

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  1. Yep. It’s decided, I Will definitively do it one or these days.

  2. *gasp* they serve alcohol to kids in that restaurant?! Ha. If this had been an adult dancing it would very likely be due to consuming large amounts of alcohol.

  3. Freaking aaaaa. This is hilarr! Love this.