I am in love with all of The Kardashian sisters. I am in love with all of The Kardashian sisters. I know I say something like this every week, but that’s only because every week I am blown away by how much I am completely infatuated with their utter realness.
Scott forces Kourt and Kim to watch his appearance on Fashion Police with Joan Rivers. I’ll give props where props are due: Scott Disick often looks like he just walked out of a catalogue called Rich WASPS Monthly, so I assume his appearance on Fashion Police is the only relevant thing he has ever done in his life.
I simply love how Kim and Kourtney’s faces look just as uninterested at watching Scott on television as most of America feels about watching Scott on television.
Despite making fun of Kim while on Fashion Police for wearing a cleavage baring dress, Scott never fails to show off his weirdly, baby-smooth chest whenever he is at his therapist’s office.
Thinking this was a bit too slutty of Scott to be a mere coincidence, I looked at the last review I did that showed Scott taking a visit to his therapist and…
HE IS WEARING THE SAME EXACT OUTFIT. He clearly has a therapy suit! A suit he only wears to therapy! I wonder what therapists think about that! I always knew he was totally nuts!
Okay, so maybe he doesn’t have a therapy suit. Maybe E! just decided to do a little of the ol’ editing and make it seem like Scott is a good guy trying to fix his problems with therapy. I’m on to you, E!. I see your cheap tricks.
Scott has been invited to host the opening of his friend’s club out in Las Vegas. When he tells Kourtney about this “job” opportunity, Kourtney expresses concerns that Scott will fall off the band wagon and start drinking again. He rather defensively tells his baby mama that he trusts himself enough to not drink and so she should follow suit.
Scott then arrives in Las Vegas and immediately drinks a vodka lemonade.
Which of course leads to a Johnny Walker.
Which of course leads to a cockeyed, slurring Scott making a complete idiot out of himself as per usual.
Kourtney is slowly taking precedence as my favorite Kardashian sister and it is all because she seems to spend most of her home life in a giant bed wearing matching pajamas.
Matching pajamas, people. Though I love cute pajamas before bed, I personally, much like Mark Twain, dislike wearing pajamas while sleeping. I firmly believe that your body should be able to move freely within your Egyptian cotton sheets, and always, always take advantage of your entire bed. Sleep with your head at the end of the bed, sleep diagonally, sleep in the very middle with your limbs akimbo!
Scott, the ever-douchey, Patrick Batemen-esque has his head so far up his own, ahem, bottom, that upon his arrival home he brags about how “good” he was while at Las Vegas. Then he asks for an apology because she doubted he could resist a drink.
I’m done with Scott, you guys. I really am.