Single Girls Guide

It's Wednesday and You Can Cry If You Want To; Plus, Single Girls Live Chat Tonight!

Okay, I’m changing it up this week. The theme of these guides are usually me trying to inspire you to feel okay about yourself even if you’re single. To inspire you to not spiral into that sad person who lingers at a table in Starbucks just so they aren’t alone at their house. But today things are different. Today I’m going to let you feel sorry for yourself.

I complained to my dad the other day about something that felt important to me and his response was the same as it is a lot. He said, “Hey, at least it’s not cancer.” I get really annoyed when he says that, because obviously I know that me and my friend being in a fight is not as important as if I had a brain tumor. I know it’s a complaint that may not always get your full attention, but sometimes I don’t want to hear how minimal my problems are. I want to have a temper tantrum and just have you listen and say, “I get it. She sounds like a real bitch.”

So, I’m doing that for you today. I’m always filling you up with all the reasons why you have to look at your situation from another angle, a more positive angle. About how you’re just standing too close to the issue to really see it, that you need to enjoy being alone and how if you keep looking on everyone else’s plate, your food is gonna get cold. And all of that is TRUE. But everyone needs a break every now and then. Everyone needs to get to just be an assh**e.

I can’t deny it, the world was built for two (heard that in a new Taylor Swift song today). And its hard when you’re just one. It sucks going to dinner alone. It’s only charming for the first hour of the movie you’re seeing by yourself; walking back to your car is just sad. Being sick when you’re alone? Sucks. Being sad when you’re alone? Sucks. Missing someone when you’re alone? Sucks. Getting an engagement invitation in the mail when you’re alone? Sucks. Running into your ex when you’re alone? Sucks. Being lonely when you’re alone? SUCKS!

We want to be strong and independent and modern, and crying about not having a husband just doesn’t fit into this image we’ve worked so hard for. But ya know what? You’ve been doing a great job. You’re killing it at the whole strong, independent, modern thing and you’re allowed to admit that sometimes you just wish you could share it all with some unappreciative, emotionally bankrupt, snoring, farting, husband. It’s okay to want that. And if that’s not your type, it’s okay to want something else, too. It’s okay to want something that you don’t have right now. As long as you’re willing to pull yourself out of it soon, or let me pull you out of it, until then I give you permission to not hold yourself together all the time.

Complain to your friends, cry, listen to intense love songs, feel sorry for yourself, wish bad things on your selfish friends who are happy. It won’t mean you’ve lost the battle. It doesn’t mean you’re needy and dependent. It just means your human and you’ll get back up when you’re ready (probably around Wednesday, when I post a guide more fierce than this one).

Give yourself a break already. I’ll totes forgive you for moping around and being lonely. I mean, I can’t relate to it because I’m so evolved its NUTS, but I bet you’re going to be fine.

Featured image via

Check out the Single Girls Guide live stream every Wednesday at 6pmPST/9pmEST. Erin (@efosta) will answer all of your questions about crushes, love and dating LIVE from the HelloGiggles UStream chat room. Make sure to log on every Wednesday and catch up on any episodes you may have missed.

Got a question that you just have to get off your chest? Send it into with the subject line “Single Girls Guide”!

  • Lauren Fuchs

    Couldn’t agree more! Sometimes I get annoyed at myself and others for whining when I know things could be much worse and are for others out there. But every now and then, everyone needs time to vent or be mad or be sad and let it out. Bottling emotions (something I can be an expert at) is way too dangerous. Let it out, get yourself back together and go on being your normal awesome self!

  • Marney S.

    This is so perfect. Everyone deserves a chance to wallow in their own sadness every once in a while. Just because other people have it bad doesn’t mean you can’t be sad about your own situation. As long as you get it out of your system, being sad for yourself is just fine!

  • Delfina Gaxiola

    Okay, my turn to be an a$$hole: what is the deal with being so upset about being alone??? Taylor Swift has it all wrong. There must be some sort of self-help book/therapy technique/reality check that aids in getting over this (seemingly female-specific) problem. If you’re concerned about what others will think when they see you doing things alone, please realize that nobody cares. Really. Don’t miss out on amazing meals, movies, and experiences just because you don’t have anyone to share them with, because then you’re alone AND boring. I just don’t understand it.

    • Lori Dargis

      Totally agree, I’m a huge fan of doing things alone! It’s the best! I suppose those people just haven’t been single for a while and maybe still aren’t over their exes/are more extroverted and, ergo, like doing things along with other people instead of alone. But I’ve always enjoyed eating alone/doing anything alone. This also has nothing to do with the fact that I’m an avid people-watcher. Okay, maybe it does a little.

  • Katie Van Patten

    Erin if you wrote a book I’d buy a copy for every girl I know.

  • Natalie Borriello

    I freaking love your posts…sometimes a girl just needs to have a pity party for one and that’s ok.

  • Ashley Nason

    totally agree with you. great post…what taylor swift song is that line from?

  • Theresa Biv

    Just discovered you like 10 minutes ago, and I’m seriously thinking about signing up for twitter just so I can follow you. Thank you.

Need more Giggles?
Like us on Facebook!

Want more Giggles?
Sign up for our newsletter!