Item of the Day

Starbucks Venti Iced Coffee, street name “The Nancy Botwin”

Breakfast is indisputably the most “important meal of the day,” according to ’90s commercials for artificially flavored and colored breakfast cereals.  In the spirit of breakfast, I treat myself to one very necessary beverage every single morning: a Starbucks Venti Iced Coffee, known on the streets as a “Nancy Botwin” (who has been filmed carrying a large iced coffee in almost every single scene of Showtime’s hit series WEEDS).

If I don’t drink my Nancy Botwin first thing in the morning, I feel like my day just isn’t right.  And it’s not because I’m addicted to caffeine (that’s an implicit given), which honestly has forever altered my brain chemistry to depend on its pep-building momentum.  My day just isn’t right without my Nancy Botwin because it’s delicious (2 splendas + heavy cream=LIKE A BOSS), it’s refreshing (all that ice really does cool my 98.6 degrees down to like a chillier 97.4 degrees [I’m guessing]), and it’s totally addictive (this may be psychosomatic, or this may be an actual a caffeine addiction-thing)!

On any given day, I warn people not to even come near me if I haven’t had my Nancy Botwin, because I can’t even possibly try to tolerate anyone (or anything) prior to treating my body to the creamy, icey, almost chocolatey euphoria of my morning venti iced coffee.   And unlike the Showtime Nancy Botwin, this tall drink isn’t selfish!  For all of these reasons, a Nancy Botwin is a definite Hellogiggles item of the day.