Item of the Day

Anyone else want to eat a gun when they hear someone say, “real women have curves”? Not because you don’t love (or even envy) women with a full shape, but because you’re very much a real woman even though you have a stick-straight figure?

That’s how I feel. My knees are bigger than my boobs, ladies. I have more arms and legs than I know what to do with, and my ass is so boney that it hurts to sit on anything wooden or metal for too long. One time I was walking down the street and some homeless dude hollered at me, “Wooo! There goes shorty with the 80s ass!”

You know what he meant by an 80s ass? He meant like a flat aerobics instructor ass. Okay? As if I hang out at the YMCA in stretch pants with a high cut leotard over them, an oversize top, a braided headband and my name is actually Donna. So that’s where I’m at.

I think this dress that I found on ModCloth is a potential solution for me. It totally gives the appearance of curves and has a flattering waistline.

I normally steer clear of anything that’s mostly white (unless it was made by Hanes, came in a five-pack and has a v-neck) because I’m a slob, but this is a dress that seems like it’d be worth acting a little bit more lady-like for.

  • Skye Tenorio

    I’m a curvy lady, but I do think the only time you can correctly form of the sentence is “Real women have vaginas.”

    Hopefully I don’t offend any trans ladies…

    • molls

      Totally, Skye! :)

  • Marissa A. Ross

    Ugh, yes, THANK YOU.

  • Jessica Day

    Every woman is a real woman, no matter her shape. I may be curvy one, but I definitely know my less busty friends are just as womanly if not more. I like this :) I think that people too often use that phrase to combat back at advertising/designers that say thin is the only way to be… but what really need is to understand that all women are made different and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

  • Annabelle Foster

    That dress is gorgeous. And Pippa and Kate Middleton are both gorgeous ladies with straight up-and-down figures. Kate even had to get hip padding put on her wedding dress! Anyway, since they are both apparently the new fashion icons, maybe more stuff will be coming out to flatter the less curvaceous?

  • Jc Coccoli

    Where my lanky girls at, yo?!

  • Stefanie McIrvin

    As a lady with some seriously bangin curves and who HATES her bangin curves, I really enjoyed reading your post Molls. I have always envied those stick-straight figure gals, who can wear skinny jeans without looking like an elephant and who can wear xsmall shirts because their boobs don’t take up half the shirt. I guess it just goes to show that we never want what we have and don’t appreciate what we have. So, thanks Molls, for reminding me to love my curves!

    • molls

      :) Yes! Bottom line is, there is something out there to make everyone feel FLYYYY.

  • Justine A. Wayne

    I think folks forgot to mention this dress is awesome! Love the sharp contrasts! Let’s see u in it!

    • Molly McAleer

      I don’t actually own the dress (or most of the Items of the Day we’ll be posting here) but it’s on my wish list! :)

  • Sarah H

    Looks like a cute dress. :) Not that I’d even fit into it. >:(

  • Rebecca Doris

    the funniest part about this post (to me) is that my friend’s mom, who is in fact named donna, used to be an aerobics instructor.

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