Hell on Heels: Soul Searching

I Went Soul Surfing With Sharks & I Think One Just Smiled At Me

Growing up in sunny Florida, I spent endless summers at the beach.   Local surfers have always had a saying- “Never turn your back on a wave.”

I have been studying our mother, nature.   She exists and she is as she is; we say that things have a “good” nature or a “bad” nature, but really all they have is a nature…upon which we have projected our own ideas of “good” and “bad”.   We may become aware of the projections, but we cannot escape the nature.  So I’ve been studying, because I’d like to learn about what I must live with, and even learn to love what I once did not understand.

Sometimes I think I’m from Mars, but I’ve been told this cannot be so, because there’s no water on Mars and we all know that our anatomy needs water to sustain life.  But then they said they were wrong, and deep below the surface of Mars, water may still flow as a liquid.  So I could still be from Mars, but I’m deviating from the point here- the water.  There’s something in the water.


Like Bruce Lee said, it is shapeless; it adapts… it can flow or it can crush.  It can sustain life or it can kill.  Float or sink.  It can be gentle, or it can be rough.  It is the paradoxical nature of water that makes it such a marvelous muse.

The water in our bodies probably moves the same way.  If water might be flowing underground on Mars, this may not be so hard to believe.  You are a part of the Earth; you are not special or different.  You are of the Earth and connected to the Earth, and you may break the laws of man, but you cannot break the laws of nature.

We may build dams to hold water back, but we are not more powerful than the water and neither is our dam.  We can only contain water for as long as it wishes to be contained.  The dams may break.  Our eyes may well up with tears and even what we thought to be the most solid of dams may break and the water comes crashing down…

Mother is cunning and she is never broken.   She is never bested.  She’s always for the win.  I marvel at mother, because she is simultaneously the gentlest, yet most powerful entity I’ve ever known.  When at first she seems cruel, upon later examination, you find that she was instead acting out of love; there is nothing like a mother’s love.

Those tears may cleanse your eyes.  My tears have cleansed my soul.  I have tasted the salt and known that it was mine…and I have known that this was mother, professing her love and letting me know that she is here, to nurture me, so long as I allow her.

In these bodies, we sometimes feel what we describe as “waves” of emotions.  I have come to believe that these waves are no different than the waves I have watched rolling up in a gentle lull to kiss the sand on the beach; no different than the waves I have watched come from where the sky seems to end at the ocean, raging and furious from their travels, crashing onto the shore just to break and softly slip away, back to the center of the ocean.

These waves of emotion need to be treated with the same respect and healthy curiosity that we treat the waves in the ocean.  They are teeming with life that we do not see because we don’t look- there may be sharks lurking beneath the surface, or there may be dolphins jumping joyfully.  Explore.  If you see a shark swimming in the shadows, although he may look scary and sinister, he’s just a big fish with sharp teeth- and sharks aren’t fond of human flesh.  He doesn’t want to eat you.  We taste disgusting.  Stop thrashing about and the sharks will not confuse you for a baby seal.  Be still in the water.

And never turn your back on a wave.

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