The Week In WHAT?!How Your Food May Be Deceiving YouJonathan Zipper

Nemo came. Nemo saw. Nemo conquered. Shortly after, the pope resigned. Then Valentine’s Day descended upon us with the throwback gift of a Tamagotchi. Life sure knows how to be the ultimate regifter. On top of that, President’s Day is here! So before you get your holiday freak on, here’s another edition of “The Week In WHAT?!”

Do All Cars Have a Mind of Their Own? Have you ever thought about revving up your car engine, hitting the gas and seeing just how fast your super fly ride can go? Well, that’s what inadvertently happened to one French citizen when his Renault Laguna developed a mind of its own during a routine trip to the supermarché. Travelling at a manageable 60 MPH when the speedometer jammed, Frank Lecerf attempted to slow his car down by making the inherently obvious move of stepping on the brakes. Except each time he did so, the automobile accelerated instead. The car finally topped out at a speed of 125 MPH and stayed there until it eventually ran out of gas… in Belgium. Fortunately, Lecerf called emergency services and police escorted him along the international high speed chase. At least the rides won’t seem so terrifying on his next trip to Disneyland Paris!

You May Not Be Eating What You Think You’re Eating Speaking of terrifying, chain restaurants in New York City are required by law to publish calorie counts on their menus. One trip to a location in the Big Apple could force you to break up with your all-time favorite fast-food joint. Now, thanks to a pending federal law, all chains with more than twenty locations in the United States will have to do the same across the country. But just how accurate are the numbers? To uncover the truth, filmmaker Casey Neistat visited a science lab to test the nutritional value in a handful of items from various establishments. SPOILER ALERT: The most shocking of his findings didn’t even come from a chain but rather from a prepackaged “healthy vegan” sandwich often found at local delis and food markets. Eek! Imagine what other brands are blatantly lying in all of their 411. Actually, on behalf of your sanity, it’s probably best you don’t.

Tea For Your Nightmares: Sleep Tight! In other eerie food related news, a German company apparently wants to scare customers into buying their tea. If their slogan is to be believed, Herbaria herbal tea will help you drown your fears. And you’ll probably need something to assist you after checking out their latest advertisement featuring Pennywise, Leatherface and the Grim Reaper in all of its HD glory:

An Internal(ly Fictional) Affair File this one under disturbingly inappropriate. Politics is always a polarizing topic of conversation, and occasionally a highly partisan organization comes under fire for crossing one too many lines. Allegedly, a probe into conservative super-PAC FreedomWorks uncovered an internal promotional video that features someone impersonating former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton… while in the act of receiving oral stimulation from a notably female intern. Oh, and the intern happens to be wearing a panda suit. Outrage over the fantastical production appears to extend across major party lines as even some former FreedomWorks officials were disgusted by the concept. However, their reasoning seems to have more to do with concern over potential lawsuits versus the nature of the film. Since this is just a report, here’s to letting you decide!

And there you have this week in “WHAT?!” Can’t wait to see what’s in store for humanity next!

Image via Change.org

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