Gumdrop Lane

How to Look Great In Photos

Since the invention of photography, posing has plagued the masses. You want to look good. You need to look good. You will be frozen in time basically forever. You’re going to be time traveling. Yes, that’s right, time traveling. If someone gave you a ticket to ride on the Time Travel Express, you’d want to look amazing. You wouldn’t show up wearing a raggedy old nighty with your hair in curlers. You’d don your finest onesie with your mane coiffed into a bouffant as high as the Chrysler building!

It’s only natural. People want to look their best. Some practice posing in front of the mirror and thus look exactly the same in every photo you ever see of them. Something like a hand on the hip, a three quarter turn of the head with a slight tilt of the chin. But there is more to the world than one look. Nobody ever won anything with one look. Sure, it can work at times – for example:

Beyonce’s power pose says she’s a strong, independent woman. She pushes out her chest as if to say, “Here are my boobs.” And she’s proud of them. And she should be.

Nicole Kidman’s modest hand clasp says she’s humble and likes to protect her womb. She’s saying to the world, “This is my quaint uterus. Just a cozy home for babies.” So it shall be.

Megan Fox’s tongue on the teeth says one thing: “My teeth are delicious.” And that’s great. She’s working her best features.

But these gals are trained professionals. How can a mere amateur like you or me hope to look as great? We don’t have a team to help us identify what looks good. But don’t worry! Don’t fret! I’ve got some good news for you. Some great news, actually: I have studied their methods and uncovered their secrets and have discovered How to Look Great in Photos. There’s more to it than just working your angles and finding the light. Oh, so much more! So check out the video above and I’ll just say it now: you’re welcome.

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