Hello, Gigglers! Welcome to Faith Forays. This is a place where I will both talk about the events of today’s world through the lens of my own personal faith, as well as ask you how your faith informs your day to day. I want this to be an open, safe space for any faith population.
Let me start by sharing with you a little bit of my story. I was raised in a fundamentalist Christian home. If you don’t know what that means, picture the far right end of Christianity. The very far right end, the one that thinks Republicans are next to godliness and that all bodily illness can be cured with prayer. I was home-schooled with my four siblings. It was kind of like the Duggars, just with a little bit less kids. Oh, and I was allowed to wear shorts. My parents were pastors, and I was constantly in church.
Since then, I’ve moved on, in a lot of ways. I’m no longer connected to that brand of Christianity in any way. I still label myself a Christian, and my faith does influence what I do and say. But I have frequent moments of doubt, just like anyone else. There are times when I want to just be done with Christians and church and the whole thing. Each time another public figure makes headlines condemning a people group, I want to just weep. I’m so upset by the public face of Christianity, and how it has become this intolerant symbol of hate.
I’m still in transition on my journey of faith. I know where I stand on some things, but not others. I struggle to love those whose words and actions are hurtful. I’m not quite sure what I believe as far as heaven and the afterlife and what that looks like. The basic tenants of my personal faith are love and service, grace and mercy. The kind of God I want to believe in isn’t a man with a white beard, perpetually angry at the citizens of the planet. The God I want to believe in loves, serves, gives grace and is merciful. I firmly believe that God wants me to be happy, and that the things that I love to do are the things I was made to do.
I don’t have all the answers, and I don’t want to pretend like I even have it all together. I’m not a theologian and I’m certainly not an expert, but I think my background has informed me enough to talk about this sort of thing with some degree of knowledge. I might talk about the evolution of my faith journey, and I might talk about current events and issues through my own faith lens. I really want to hear your thoughts, no matter if you have a religious affiliation or not!
As highly private as religion can be, there are also all sorts of faith experiences that we can all share in. The feeling of disillusionment as we grow out of the faith of our parents. The contentment that comes from knowing what, exactly, it is you believe in – even if what you believe in is just that the idea of god isn’t real for you. The hope that springs from belief in something eternal, whatever that something is.
The evolution of our personal faith speaks to the very core of who we are. It can sometimes be difficult to articulate the growth I’ve had in my faith journey, because the person I was five years ago only vaguely resembles who I am now. My faith and belief are integral parts of me, but I’m pretty sure if you’d have told a younger me about the sort of faith I’d practice in the future, she would have been horrified. But as I’ve learned and grown, I have felt like my faith has helped me come into myself, into who I was always meant to be.
What about you? Do you find it difficult to define your spirituality, or lack of, as you grow older? Do you have your own personal faith evolution?
As a young person in the Unitarian Universalist church, I feel blessed by my family’s attitude towards religion. I feel encouraged by my church to find my path, and because of this I am very grounded in my religion. Although I don’t know all of the answers yet, and I don’t think I ever will, the fact that my church community supports this and tells me that what I do know is truly important means the world to me. I believe that I can learn the wisdom of many teachers, and from this I can continue on my spiritual journey. Thank for the post, and I wish you luck in finding a church home! UUism works pretty well for me
If you haven’t already read it, check out “The Unlikely Disciple” by Kevin Roose. It’s a great, quick read that has really made me examine my own faith. I read it over the summer when going through some family issues, and I think that believers and non-believers can both get something from it.
“This I command you, that you love one another” – John 15:17
I’m a Christian Orthodox (I live in Greece). The Orthodox part doesn’t matter very much to me, I prefer to think of Christianity as an entity. Anyway. I used to be Christian out of habit, because that’s how I was raised, that’s what my parents and everyone I know is. Later, I developped the classic doubts, about the very existence of God. But as I grew older and thought it through, I came to this conclusion. There is, by nature, no way for anyone to prove either that there is either that there isn’t a God. No argument can be without retort, from both sides. It’s OK, though, because we’re talking about FAITH, not KNOWLEDGE. Faith is simply a matter of choice. I speak only for myself, but I WANT a God to exist, so I do. I like it better that way, it makes more sense to me. That’s all the proof I need. But I would never try to persuade anyone, that’s as personal a matter as it gets. Details don’t matter very much, but I’m a Christian because Jesus preached to love each other, and that is a message I can respect.
I have found that my personal faith made a difference in my life, in the way that it gives me strength and tranquility. When I’m very sad, or anxious and I pray, it works for me, it’s good. Again, that’s all the proof I need.
PS. I love the idea of this column!
I feel that I lie somewhere in the uncomfortably-close-to-hypocracy zone of the spectrum, which has been my biggest struggle over the past 7 years or so. When I was young, I was an out-right an proud Christian from no particular denomination and my beliefs were based on my own personal thoughts. Being raised in a family where mom took me to chapel on Sundays, and dad’s lapsed catholicism allowed me to attend the close catholic elementary school, I was able to observe two approaches to christianity as well as dad’s ambiguous faith system.
While I no longer attend church – more out of a fear of stumbling into a cult-like right-wing assembly in the city I recently moved to and don’t know well – I feel the need for a christian support system that neither preaches out-dated, man-made doctrines, nor sugar-coats the Bible to satisfy every human whim. I see sin resting on either end of a teeter-totter, and the best I can do is try to keep them both ends off the ground. It’s really tough to find someone who will support my particular process of balance.
It’s the worst when people in my life, on TV, or randoms feel the need to emphatically (one more time with gusto) put down God, Christ, or Christianity like it’s some universal joke. I honestly feel attacked when atheists and agnostics (and certainly anyone with a passion for the cause of “there-is-no’God”) claim or insinuate that I will rain down on them the wrath of God or try to convert them. I’m no evangelist. I don’t aim to put my faith first (maybe I should – here’s where I see the hypocrisy red flags); mine’s only one in a world of billions of personal interpretations of hundreds (more?) of beliefs. I feel that there are a number of faiths out there that probably have a lot of truth to them outside of Christianity – Judaism especially. I really want to learn more about the Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists etc. Understanding our roots and those of others can only show us that we have a lot more in common than we may have guessed, which is, I think, what Christ was trying to show us. It would be so nice if I could feel safe in being known as the Jesus-freak in a seemingly endless sea of non-believers.
Thanks for writing this post – it’s nice to see that God’s not yesterday!
First step for overcoming hypocrisy? Recognizing you may be a hypocrite. So you’re on the right track! On one hand, I agree with you that public depictions of Christianity aren’t positive and that we’re not all like that – but we have allowed the public figures who represent Christianity to the majority of the secular world to be those kinds of people, so I don’t think we can really expect anything different as long as our “christian leaders” are exactly like the kinds of Christians we see on TV.
Great article!
I believe strictly what the Bible teaches.
#1 Not all good people go to heaven (Acts 2:34, Matthew 11:11, Psalms 37:9, 11, 29)
#2 There is no such thing as hell (Ecclesiastes 9:5, 10, Psalms 146:4)
#3 People who have died will be resurrected to live on a perfect Earth (John 5:28, 29)
#4 God is love. He loves all his children, and would never cause any suffering. (1 John 4:8)
If people who claimed to be called Christians truly followed the Bible, Christians would not be generally thought of as intolerant and hateful. The feminist in me has some inner turmoil reconciling some parts of the Bible with what I perceive to be the truth. I also worry about the hate crimes committed against gay people in the name of God because the Bible is straightforward about homosexuality being a sin (though it does not condone violence or abuse toward anyone who is gay). There is much about love and mercy in the Bible which still resonates with me though my faith too has evolved from when I was younger from the religion I was brought up with.
I was so surprised to see something about faith on Hello Giggles but I am so glad it has been said! I love the line “I firmly believe that God wants me to be happy, and that the things that I love to do are the things I was made to do”. I have recently been at such an ease with my faith and part of it is because I know that God has a plan! I have had ups and downs like anyone and come from a non- Christian household and my boyfriend and close- friends are not believers but that doesn’t stop me! MY relationship with God is what matters and yes I think it would be great for them to experience God’s love but I know that is their decision and they are still supportive of me. Throughout University I did not go to Church much and worried that it would affect my relationship with him but now I know that it is great to worship together but as long as I am still praying and keeping my connection to God alive then all is good. When I left University I got a job as a Youth Worker within a Church and helping the teenagers grow in faith has strengthened me too. Just as I felt vulnerable in my faith he brought me an opportunity to strengthen it and I now know that I just have to trust in his plan for me and that we can get through it together!
I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed it! Thanks for reading
Great post! I grew up Christian, went to a church school and participated in youth group and even went to a Christian University. One thing that I always struggled with was my far left view on life and politics compared to all my Christian friends. It wasn’t until college that I started to question my beliefs and being a part of this denomination. In college I was the crazy liberal democratic from Massachusetts in a sea of southern Republicans. I sometimes felt that being a Christian as they believed went against what I thought was right. It wasn’t until I was older and took the time to figure out what my faith meant to me and how I saw God and understood my belief that I became comfortable in my way of thinking. I still go to church but now I take the time to really research and look into what the pastor says as well as my fellow church goers.
I commend you for really paying attention to what the pastor says – unthinking belief can lead to a lot of problems in a congregation.
I commend you for posting your personal beliefs, knowing that some would accept it, and others would condemn it. I personally, am a very strong Christian. Maybe not in the complete “traditional” way though. I dress like any other college aged girl (for the most part). I listen to normal music. I have cable. And I make mistakes all the time. However, I do my best to try to live how God has called me to, through His words in the Bible and what He has placed on my heart. I go to a Christian college, and attend regular chapel services and sunday church. I read the Bible regularly, and listen to Christian music occasionally. But I am by no means perfect. I have messy spirituality, and wrestle with God. But I still seek Him. I am no better than anyone, and don’t claim to be. I don’t judge those who don’t beilieve, because I’ve struggled with it too. I don’t expect others to live like I do, or believe what I do. If someone doesn’t want to talk about God or my faith, then I won’t, we can talk about other things. If they do, I’ll chat for hours. Whether you’re atheist, christian, muslim, or hindu, I’ll love and serve you. No matter your beliefs. Because I believe that God calls us to love all and act like Jesus, as a servant. But even still, I don’t have it “all together” or have all the answers. However, some really awesome books to maybe consider reading are “Messy Spirituality” and “Forgotten God”, as well as “Crazy Love.” Just an idea :] Thank you for sharing.
When I first started out writing about faith, I was initially really anxious to talk in the public forum about it. But so far, my experience has been that people are really gracious and respectful, which I so appreciate.
Everything you said is something that easily could have come out of my mouth. From the conservative upbringing, to the feelings of doubt and disillusionment, to the tentatively trying to sort through it all…. it’s like we’re the same person. I’m so glad that someone is speaking for those who hate the way Christians come across in our culture. I wish everyone could understand that we aren’t all like that. Thank you for that.
Wow, I’m so honored by your comment. I’m loving this discovery that there’s more than just me out there, feeling this about the current church environment.
Awesome! I appreciate seeing someone who has some of the same complicated feelings I have, on such a fun, positive site. I hope this doesn’t turn into one big debate or fall by the wayside. Faith is rigid and all important as children, but as adults we are truly free to choose. And it is a hard decision! I have made some stupid declarations in the name of Jesus, and as an adult I see how silly I was. Jesus is about freedom and love’ not hating on Creed right?!
I would love to hear from others about their faiths, Muslim and mormon specifically!
I TOTALLY relate to that! Exactly. I’d love to hear from a Mormon perspective especially, since I’ve heard varying opinions on their similarities to Christianity.
Although I have many thoughts on this particular topic, I’ll just say that I’m on the journey of coming into my faith, and that I feel so much better about this world now that I’m beginning to understand, in a way, the Lord. I’m currently reading a book that I feel God lead me to, and I’d like to share it with you. It’s called “Closer Than Your Skin” by Susan D. Hill. It’s all about cultivating a more loving, personal, intimate relationship with God. I’ve been recommending this book to every Christian I know, regardless of where they stand on the spectrum of belief. It’s helping me understand that God is personal, loving, and patient, and that He has a plan for all of us. Let me know what you think if you read it. It’s great.
Thanks for posting this.
Thanks for the recommendation. I’ll be sure to check it out! One thing that’s changed in my progression of faith is that I feel uncomfortable referring to God as a gender, although I totally understand that it’s the common practice for most churches. I just kind of want to believe that God transcends gender – thinking of God as a non-gendered entity helps me feel like I can trust that more.
When I refer to God, I use He, Him, Father, Son, because that’s how the Trinity has been explained. However, I don’t really believe that God has a gender, just like I don’t believe that a soul has a gender. Your body is only a vessel, and in a way, I think using a gender name for God is the same thing. It’s just a term we use. I don’t really care what people call God, as long as the belief is there. Names don’t define us.
I love this article, while i was reading it, i felt as if you had penned down my thoughts, something that had been going on in head a lot recently- so THANK YOU!
I was born and brought up in a muslim home. My mother taught me Islam as closely as she could. However i had my flipflopping periods. Sometimes i believed but did not practice, sometimes I practiced but didnt fuly believe and then it was as if I was muslim in name only. But recently something happened and it feels as if I am finally CONTENT. I feel at peace.. It was almost as if He pulled me back and it made me realize just how merciful and loving God really is. Knowing this alone, i felt like all depression, anxiety and all sorts of burdens were lifted from my shoulders.
I finally realised what it MEANT to be content and completely satisfied. and suddenly all my prayers and worship started to make sense and have meaning.
I pray that everyone finds this kind of contentment along their faith-journies, and to be able to live life freely, the way its supposed to be!
Thank you so much for sharing! I’m so glad to hear your story. That kind of peace with your faith is something I so admire.
My faith as been steadily evolving since high school. I went meandering through other denominations, having been raised in a half Lutheran-half Agnostic home. I wasn’t sure whether what I was feeling was part of my youthful wonderings or something more. One of the things my faith walk-about did show me was how different types of Christianity can be. I like to think of myself as one of the “nots” in the “more often than not” quote from Matthew Inman (whom I adore). I came across some very selfish, egotistical, cruel people and some open minded, kind, and giving people on both sides of the “Belief” debate. I’ve seen some people alienated in an almost “Mean Girls” way in a church and have seen atheists hold hands with praying Christians over a tragedy. I’ve also seen a church and it’s secular counterparts of different denominations/atheists and agnostcis group together for a common goal that was a cancer charity. We cannot and should not be put into boxes regarding such a personal relationship. My faith is mine. Not to be judged by anyone of any denomination because it is MY relationship and it gives ME peace. Some people need explanations to consider their point of view valid, some need charts and graphs, some need “just a feeling” and what bugs me is the great question of “if it doesn’t directly affect you, why on EARTH does it bother you?”
I agree with disagreeing as well because it bodes well with me and what I believe. Lets be friends, shall we?
I’ve totally seen the oddities of church cliques and been burned by them many times. Especially having been a pastor’s kid – nothing is more likely to cause the “cool” church group to ostracize you than that! The inner circles of judgement that happen in a church setting are just so common, and can be really hurtful.
I love your quote: “My faith and belief are integral parts of me, but I’m pretty sure if you’d have told a younger me about the sort of faith I’d practice in the future, she would have been horrified.” I occasionally think that about my own faith journey, and I sometimes I am horrified by looking back to who I was (much like you on the conservative Christian spectrum). I think one of the toughest things is extending grace to myself in the present, as I learn who I am spiritually, but also who I was.
Exactly! That’s something that’s been really hard for me – reconciling the hurtful things I said and believed in the past with who I am now.
I think Matthew Inman pretty much sums it up here: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/religion.
I am an atheist myself and I admit, I find it hard to talk to religious people. More often than not, they label me as being hellbound, because I do not believe in a god. They seem to find worship of some supreme being more important than the way I try to live my life.
If you believe in a god, that’s fine by me, but please don’t judge me because I don’t. Just like I don’t understand how anyone can believe in a all-powerful and good supreme being, you can’t understand that I can’t. Let’s all just agree to disagree, whether or not we believe in god, allah, jahwe/jehova, vishnu, buddha or whomever.
I’ve seen that comic before, and a lot of it is really, really accurate. I think that your decision and where you stand in your absence of faith is just that – your decision. And you should be able to live free of judgement from that.
I was raised in a non-denominational church that was probably not far off from the kind of faith you were around growing up, and as a PK you have my sympathy, I know that’s hard!
I read a book called “If Grace is True” after college, and it really freed me to believe what I already hoped was true, that hell is a fantasy and heaven a worthwhile hope for all mankind. I believe in a God who would never give up on anyone, even after they die, and holds all the inhabitants of the world in love.
I found a good spiritual home at a Unitarian Universalist church, which is based on the belief that everyone should be allowed to seek out their own spiritual path, and all kinds of exploration and growth is encouraged. It’s pretty good stuff.
Great essay, and I’m glad to see Hello Giggles embrace their spiritual side!
Clara – I’ve heard a bit about the UU church recently, but I haven’t really looked into it. Do you feel it’s given you a place to call your church home? That’s something I’m still searching for. Thank you for sharing!
I hesitate to call it a church home just yet, but it’s starting to – almost – feel like that. I think the definition of a church home is still in process for me, but it’s welcoming, sweet, and although it’s full of aging hippies, I love the peace and focus it gives me, as well as belonging to something.