“How tall are you?”
I get this question every day, mostly from curious strangers. It’s not unusual for someone to look at me the way Billy Crystal looked up to Max Zamphirescu in My Giant – with wide eyes and disbelief that unlike them, I can reach all of the shelves at the grocery store.
“Um. I’m 5’10”. But I also have a shoe with some lift to it, so it may seem like I’m taller.” The conversation ends with either a blank stare, or one of two follow-up questions. A) Do you model? or B) Do you play basketball? With an awkward shrug, I tell them I do neither of those things. I just watch a lot of television and sit on a lot of couches, since my giant limbs get tired from all of those Doritos I eat. And while I should be used to the height question, it still constantly catches me off guard. My sister is of equal height and my Dad is 6’5”, so I was constantly surrounded by tall when I was growing up.
The problem is, I think some people relate height to power. I once had a boss that wasn’t even 5 foot, and you could tell it was an issue that severely bothered her. Despite the fact that she held a supreme position at the organization, you could tell she was uncomfortable even walking next to me in the hallway.
One day, she confided in me that in high school, she ran for Student Council and couldn’t reach the microphone during her speech – she had to depend on a stool that hid behind the podium. “The whole class laughed at me,” she said before quickly switching the subject. I’m not sure if she won or lost, but I’m sure she blamed either victory or defeat on her size, as opposed to her capabilities.
This insecurity is an issue that many others face and one that is challenging to cure. Shoes and posture-improving stretches aside, there’s no quick fix for height anxiety. Like any personal obstacle, it could be directly to blame as to why you didn’t get where you wanted to go – whether it be scoring a job, or going on a blind date.
Obviously height is something that people can pinpoint about you at first glance but truthfully, I’ve only taken a distinct notice of it when someone acts as if everyone is silently judging them. The more confident you are with who you are, the less people will use “short” or “tiny” as the first adjectives to describe you. Also, remember to keep a light heart about it. If my former boss made a joke about the microphone incident and reminded the crowd how she was small in stature yet soaring with ambition, people would have taken note on how intelligent and socially capable she was.
Never in my life have I heard someone being dismissed from an opportunity based on height, nor will I ever. Even in the modeling industry – although 5’10” and up girls are pegged for the runway, catalog models and commercial actors come in all shapes and sizes. The taller athlete is a fine choice, but it’s the best, most invested athlete that will definitely succeed. It’s not about ideals as much as working hard to achieve what you want to achieve.
Short girls of the world, have faith. As a tall girl, I’ve also suffered from my share of disappointment, confidence issues, and embarrassing situations. While you may have been carded for an R-rated movie at the theater, I’ve walked into tree branches and bumped my head on basement ceilings. While you are probably more comfortable wearing a challenging heel, I’m most comfortable in a black flat (otherwise, I’d be viewing things from ground level). Plus, almost every dress I order online is just a little too short to be considered classy. And unlike you, that’s something that a trip to the tailor won’t fix. Oh, if only.
Photo Credit: ToonJunkie
Wonderful things. I will occur again again quickly to study some even more.
I am just under 5″10 and I have a 36″ inseam. I love being tall and would never change it for anything in the world. I also get asked the model/basketball questions and I politely brush them off. I have above average posture because I have been studying ballet since I was five and I love to wear 4″. Whenever I see another tall girl who is slouching it breaks my heart. I think you should be proud of your height regardless of how “tall” or “short” you are and never let anyone else make you feel badly about how you look.
Have you noticed that height is the only socially acceptable attribute others can comment upon? Race, ethnicity, and weight are all out of bounds. I’m 6’2 and get stopped at least three times a day to answer questions about my height (this has also made me a pretentious tall person–anyone who is under 6’0 isn’t tall). For those uncomfortable with their sky-high stature, read The Tall Book by Arianne Cohen. It really taught me to embrace my height.
I’m 5’3″ and have been since 5th grade( now I’m in 10th) I run and all the other girls are tall and have really long legs. The entire team has taken to calling me Midge. Luckily it’s something I’ve learned to accept and I’ve even started to beat the taller girls in races… And just for the record, hobbits are cool.
I’m a little one. 5 foot (maybe 5’1″). People do make comments about how little I am, even people I’ve known for a few years! I just say “yeah, but I can stand up straight on the window of a plane, and curl up on it to sleep”. I don’t do very well in heels either because I’ve had numerous bad sprains to my ankle. If I go out in flats, I can dance better and usually have quite alot of fun because my feet aren’t aching at the end. I sometimes wish I was just a little taller…but it isn’t going to happen so I mostly embrace my shortness. It’s also funny to see tall people’s bogies.
I’m 5’10″ and I still struggle with it. My husband is 5’9″, I love heels, and I hate feeling like a giant. Clearly, these things don’t add up. My older sister told me when I was young that I would be happy that I was tall when I got older, but I still feel that the tiny petite girls “have more fun.”
I still feel awkward around a group of girls and I don’t wear heels on dates with my husband. I find it hard to believe that anyone would feel inferior just because of their small size.
But on the plus side, I can always reach the top shelf and I do sorta like (just a little!) the surprise in people’s voices when they say “Whoa, you’re tall!”
No, I don’t model or play basketball. So glad to hear this from someone else, it used to make me feel like a failure when I replied to those questions, but now it makes me laugh. And I’ll never get tired of reaching for high things for my vertically challenged friends.
I spent soooo many years slouching along and trying to hide my 5’11” height. I can so relate to the “do you model” and “do you play basketball” questions – the answer is no my ass is too big and I’m completely incapable of catching a ball. But a few years ago I started dancing. Yes I’m taller than 99% of my dance partners but it has taught me great posture! I love shoes and so now I wear heels with pride. Because of my posture and heels most people think I’m taller than my 6’2″ Dad but you know what, when I catch sight of myself in a shop window standing tall and proud – I look awesome! So embrace your height.
Oh and all you tall ladies who can’t get trousers long enough – http://www.talljeans.com.au. I swear this site changed my life – I have to have my trousers taken up now!
Is that the nanny from the Muppet Babies cartoon show?
i’m 5’2″ and i LOVE it. it’s a great way to meet guys when i need something off the top shelf.
I’m bigger on the inside.
le sigh. 29 years old and 4’11″. what’s it like to be able to reach the top shelf in your kitchen cabinets or see the top of your refrigerator?
I’m 5’11″ and I’ve always struggled with feeling gigantic next to others, towering over boys, the one who always gets asked “how’s the weather up there?”. But ultimately I love my height. I’d just like to tell all short girls – don’t worry about height! Being tall can make you just as insecure as being short. Live life, don’t worry about your height. It’s what makes you you!
Is that a picture of Amelia badelia?
Nanny from the Muppet Babies. But I do love Amelia Bedelia. She helped me realize that being a little scatterbrained could be endearing.
I’m 5’11″ myself…actually, much closer to 6′ than a flat 5’11″. I get the same questions (although my large ass keeps them from asking if I model…I just get “Do you play basketball?” or “Do you play volleyball?” or “How tall are your parents?”).
For all my tall ladies out there who struggle with finding jeans or dresses long enough, I encourage you to visit oldnavy.com for their tall section and alloy.com for jeans that come in insanely long lengths. You’ll thank me.
I haven’t been measured since I was 12. I say I’m 5’7, but probably more like 5’6. I wish I were taller, then I wish I wasn’t. Life goes on. But I know tall girls, and they LOVE their height, and even wear 5 inch heels! I admire them.
I have the opposite issue! I’m one of the teensy ones. I’m 4’10 (and a half!)” and 20 years old. Haha, never will I be asked if I play basketball. Rather, I will be asked if I am a legal midget and if I have a handicap sticker on my car. (No, and no.) It can be super annoying, and sometimes feels like in order to come across as powerful, you have to put on a Napoleon complex. After 20 years of looking much younger than I am, I have grown out of my insecurities (emotionally, not physically!) Anyway, lovely post, nice to hear the perspective of one of the “models”
I am 6’1 and have gotten the “how tall are you” question most of my 25 years. My favorite thing though is when someone looks at you … notices your height… and then looks down at your feet to see if you are wearing heels! I usually never am! It use to bug me but now I find it hilarious
It’s funny that people get mentally caught up in the height = power thing. I once had a “friend” who told me I couldn’t wear heels to church anymore because it made her look too short (I’m 5’9″ and she’s probably around 5’4″). I love the look of heels but sometimes I feel too tall to wear them, like I’m towering over everybody…that and I also suffer from clumsiness. I really enjoy being the height I’m at though and as far as dating goes, I tend to actually be attracted to guys who are shorter than me and I have yet to date one who voiced any insecurities about it. For anyone whose insecure about it, being different is part of what makes us all interesting so no worries if you’re on either of the extreme ends of the spectrum.
Thanks for this! I wrote my college essay about being too tall from birth and how my whole life has been affected by it. Also, even more annoying than being asked your height is when you tell them “5’10″ and they respond, “No, I’m pretty sure you’re at least 6 feet.” Um thanks.