Women's Equality

[BlairRorex]

Well written, give him vodka! :P

[anne]

Lol at this vodka spam.

Anyway, unfortunately, A LOT of people assume that feminists are fighting for special rights instead of equal rights. This is, of course, not true. However, some of feminism's messages don't come across clearly and are often marred by the false feminist notions people already have (that feminism = misandry). This is really frustrating because as much as you know and believe the true intentions of feminism, there are some people who just give it a bad reputation. I started a local webzine/blogazine for feminist issues and I always kind of want to make sure we don't forget about the men.

I often think that to be a feminist means you will have to fight two battles: the equality battle, and breaking away from the negative stereotype. Nowadays it just feels necessary.

[Crystal]

I'm very much the victim of sexism on a daily basis. I work around just about all men. It's horrible. My boss is male and he makes no secret of having favorites. First come all the men. They can get away with anything. They mostly get away with not doing their job and passing their work off to a female co-workers. My male work partner is really not so bad as the other men but if I didn't stand up for myself sometimes I would be doing more than I already do. My boss also favors the women that are okay with being sexually objectified by these men. This is 2012 coming up in about 2 weeks by the way. Not an episode of Mad Men. I live this everyday. This particular group sits around all morning talking about how much they drank while they were all out together over the weekend. They are mostly all married but they are cheating on their spouses with each other. It's disguising to witness. I know I'm the main target of a lot of their gossip. I have shot the men down sexually (rather, I have let them know I'm not into married guys without it coming to some big inappropriate gesture on their part) and as a result this has led their bruised ego to talk about me as if we are in the 10 grade and not adults teaching in a high school. The women are no better. I'm a little bit younger and I feel like a jerk saying this, but a little bit prettier. In fact, a male co-worker who invites everyone over to his house regularly doesn't invite me. I ask why other girls can go and his answer was, "Lois is an old woman and Erica aint no beauty queen. I can't have you around my wife." So I feel a bit weird saying I'm so pretty but in these men's eyes, I'm the best looking thing walking around these halls. And I get discriminated based on how I look not just by the men, but women too. I'm the only young girl that isn't over weight (not that I haven't been battling weight my whole life) and men are shallow so to them, I am what is attractive. I think I could gain 100 pounds, be the same girl and still feel pretty but then to those men I would now be unattractive. Back to the man that doesn't invite me to his house. He doesn't tell the other women, "Oh you can come over because you are ugly as sin." No, he tells them and everyone else about my crush on him and he can't have me around his wife. Remember that bruised ego? Anyhow, I share this because this directly affects how I feel about men on a bigger more personal level. I'm terrified of being in a commited relationship that leads to marriage because I know all men cheat. I know it to be true because I've seen no other behavior. My brothers are big time cheaters too but that's a whole other story. Women are just seen as doormats and we are suppose to just except it and look the other way. I think I would just rather be single than stupid.

[brightasyellow]

Crystal - I'm sorry that you're in that situation:(

Anne - you're exactly right about having to fight two fights.

[anne]

Crystal, I'm sorry you're surrounded by jerks. It's a real pain when we get to experience these internalized sexisms on the daily. And from people we interact with everyday! Ugh

[Crystal]

This is why I feel like I am less of a feminist and more of a man-hater. Instead of equal rights I say we go the opposite direction in this fight.

Only kidding of course...sorta.

[anne]

Found this on elephant journal today: http://www.elephantjournal.com/2011/12/ ... osability/

She's insightful and critical of the popular notions of feminism. She talks a lot about male disposability, which I think is just an unfortunate by-product of gender inequity. Society puts women on a pedestal because they need to be protected. Time has obscured the reasons for putting women first so now we see men on a disadvantage, as if the tables have turned. A sort of 'blame' is put on the feminist movement because it's as if women have special rights now instead of equal rights.

I think the whole feminist movement is just experiencing transition. Goals need to be reset, re-defined, and re-asserted.

[Shelby]

I know that I've definitely been discriminated against, because I have not been treated the way that I want to be treated.

There are many people who have seen me as "soft", simply because I'm a woman. Let me tell you, I don't put up with any nonsense from anyone. I treat people as PEOPLE, not as a male or a female. Honestly, from my own personal experience, I don't see much of a difference when it comes to gender. Myself, I don't usually fit the stereotype of "feminine" at all. There are certainly things about me that do fit some stereotypes, but, as a whole, I am just myself. There are stereotypically "masculine" qualities about me, too, which certain people in my life see and they are the ones who treat me more like how I want to be treated. Others... not so much.

Some people that I know are very traditional in certain respects, thinking that all women are a certain way, like certain things, etc. I feel that holds me back, as they think I'm incapable of doing the sort of things my dad does, like doing anything involving manual labour. I have been told all my life that I'm not as physically strong as a man and I have made a point of proving otherwise. Nowadays, plenty of people acknowledge that; at least, the ones who know me do. I'm not afraid to face challenges and I enjoy manual labour and creating things with my own hands, especially working with wood. I have always been the girl doing the "guy things", like electrical work, landscaping, general manual labour, building, etc. I like cars and care little about my looks.

But, when I meet new people, they don't take me seriously. To them, I'm a silly girl. Sometimes, they act like, "Look at that little girl, she thinks she's strong, haha." It makes me angry.

I'm not a feminist, because I think that concept puts too much stress on women being above men and there are certain parts of the feminist movement that I disagree with, but I am most definitely all for equality.

[CatsGiggle]

Women will never be equal to men because they are born females, not males. Men will also never be equal to women, because they are males. True Feminism begins with loving and accepting everything about a woman that makes her female. When we, as women, lower our own standards to become equal with men, we are settling for something less than we we were created to be- Female.

I am not saying to sit back and let men dominate women! I am so glad that by the grace of the first true feminists, I have a right to own land, vote, and work in the work force, even if it is manual labor for minimum wage. Important issues relating to politics and business deserve attention needed, especially when those were/are places that women are degraded.

However, it is important to steer away from things that men get caught up in and remain true to who we, as women, are.
Some women choose to stay at home and raise 6 children while their husband brings home the bacon, some women choose to take a political standpoint and lobby for things like education or healthcare, some women go to school for 8 years to become a doctor, whereas some go to school for 2 years to be a nurse. Some women own their own business or choose a route in law, while some women want to teach at an elementary school or nanny for a family. Some women want to be humble and offer their lives to serving those in most need while some women travel around the world searching for love.

My point is this: women of all race, ethnicity, income, religious, societal, etc backgrounds choose different things in life; none of which makes them less female. Embrace being a women.

As a woman, I don't feel discriminated against. I know there are women out there who are, but don't strive to be like men. Change is good but not when you change who you were meant to be-female.

[hiphopscotch]

"Change is good but not when you change who you were meant to be-female."

What is female? What is male? How should we embrace being a woman? Also, do women have to be born female to be women?